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Lyceus
Reviews
Farscape: The Peacekeeper Wars (2004)
A decent conclusion to the show with some major flaws
I love Farscape and I'm happy they made Peacekeeper Wars so the show wouldn't end in Season 4's cliffhanger. However, I don't think the miniseries was as good as the wonderful Season 4. I guess it's just hard to tell in 3 hours what would have filled a whole new season... That's true, but there are things that still annoy me. The actors are great as usual, but a lot of good and bad things come from the writer's work.
Since I've checked the spoilers option, please make sure you don't read this unless you've already seen the miniseries or you don't care about it. This comment is full of spoilers.
First, let's start with what I liked: 1) It's a nice conclusion to John and Aeryn's storyline, which I wasn't sure we'd ever get. The fact that his son is named D'Argo is predictable but a nice detail in my opinion. The Peacekepper-Scarran conflict which was growing up since Season 2 was featured too.
2) Great script. As usual, the writers made a good job with dialogs (Aeryn telling Rygel they'll name the baby after him if they're a girl, or the fun in Noranti's carrying a weapon).
3) Jothee is back. This was a major unsolved plot and I'm glad he met D'Argo again so they stopped being enemies.
4) Jool dies. I know many people won't agree but I never really liked Jool and she's the only character besides Pilot I would haven't been bothered about their death. It was nice to have her back to get killed so quickly.
Now, what I didn't like: 1) Why did D'Argo have to die? He wasn't one of my favourite characters but he was important in the show and I liked him. And now Chiana is alone in this world! Why didn't they kill Pilot instead? This isn't a major flaw though, since it was obvious more people had to die and at least John and Aeryn survives.
2) I don't like the fact Noranti is underused. I've just found out Melissa Jaffer had a problem with makeup and she couldn't have a larger part, so I can't blame anyone on this.
3) The main flaw is how they writers wrote Sikozu's part. She was absolutely out of character! His hair was terrible but it was obviously a Scorpius influence so I'll ignore it even if I didn't recognize her at first. I can't understand why a Kalish resistance member like Sikozu would become a Scarran spy. She was so smart and loyal to the resistance! In "We're So Screwed: Part 3 (La Bomba)" she's afraid anyone would reveal anything about the resistance to the Scarran, and just two months later, she's working for the enemy. And how did the Scarrans contact her? She was in a Peacekeeper ship with Scorpius, and I'm sure he'd have noticed if she had contacted the Scarrans. She couldn't be a traitor since the beginning since she was a resistance fighter who used her powers to kill Scarrans... Still, she helped her friends to get out of the Scarran ship, so I don't know what to think about Sikozu in the miniseries. She was one of my favourite characters and they absolutely ruined her in the miniseries. I guess it's implied she dies at the end, too. Since we didn't have an actual death scene (we didn't have it for D'Argo either, but I guess he may have been too wounded), I think we can still imagine she got out of the planet. I like the Sikozu/Scorpius relationship and I don't like it ended like that. At least Braca would be happy.
In conclusion, it was good but I can't forgive the writers for what they did to Sikozu... I have never seen something like that.
Painkiller Jane (2007)
Decent show which should have been renewed
It's a shame Sci Fi Channel decided to cancel "Painkiller Jane". It was a good show, with nice plots and a whole universe still to explore. Jane Vasco, played by Kristanna Loken, was a good heroine, with a fast healing ability, but "human" and imperfect. I like heroes to have dark points too, and Jane did so she was more interesting. The other characters could have been developed more, but just one season didn't leave them a lot of time.
I liked the pilot and the show became more interesting in later episodes, specially when they fought a Neuro who could see the future and Jane tried to save three of her team partners. One thing I didn't expect was Maureen's death. Despite she wasn't as important as Jane, she was interesting and I wish she had survived and stayed in the show. The second season of the show was worse, and the clips episode was really, really boring. However, "Jane 113" was shocking, and after that, we had the Hungary episodes, which were different and interesting. The last episode joined the Hungary episode with the plot we could see in "Jane 113" and was very nice. The way the show ended was perfect for at least one more season, and I would've certainly enjoyed more "Painkiller Jane" episodes.
Cleopatra 2525 (2000)
Really funny! You won't be disappointed
Cleopatra 2525 is a very funny, entertaining show. You shouldn't take all the show seriously, but if you wanna have fun, that's your TV show. Being made by the producers of Xena is a quality guarantee, and Cleopatra 2525 isn't that different from Xena. The female warriors formula is brought to the future, where they don't have to fight warriors or gods, but dangerous robots which dwell in the surface, and the humans are forced to live underground. Along the two seasons of Cleopatra, they develop an interesting and funny underground world, and we get to know the three main characters: Cleopatra (Jennifer Sky), Hel (Gina Torres) and Sarge (Victoria Pratt). They all are different, but as a team, they work really well. The three main actresses appeared previously in Xena, like most of the regular/guest cast (there are some known faces from Hercules too, or from both shows). I specially liked the character played by Danielle Cormack (Ephiny in Xena), which is very different from any of her roles I previously knew. So if you liked Xena and Hercules, you'll love Cleopatra 2525. If you don't know them, try it: I'm sure you'll enjoy it.
Crank (2006)
The worst movie I've ever seen - Let me explain why
I never wished to watch this movie, but I was on a long bus journey and the driver played a DVD with this movie and I didn't want to sleep (I should have slept and I wouldn't have wasted the time Crank lasted).
'Crank' is a stupid movie whose plot is absolutely incredible. A professional murderer needs to continuously get adrenaline or otherwise he'll die because of a drug in his blood. This idea is silly, but the way the movie develops (mainly the stupid things he does to get adrenaline) is even worse. Let's see why I hated this movie so much (these are spoilers, but I hope by then you'll be clever enough not to see this movie if you haven't):
-The only thing the main character can save his life is getting an exact dose of epinephrine. He tries to buy it at a hospital as if he was in a supermarket, the only thing he remembers about epinephrine is it starts by an E and he forgets the right dose. I wonder if he was that bad remembering the details of the murders he had to commit.
-When his girlfriend discovers he's a professional murderer, she believes he's lying, but five minutes later she's really proud of what he does for a living.
-He has sex twice in stupid situations, in order to get adrenaline: first, he tries to rape his girlfriend in a street full of people (she eventually agrees); second, when he's driving a car. That's when I realized at all that this movie had no logics and was a waste of time.
-The end is probably the most stupid part of the movie: he pushes his enemy out of a helicopter, so they both fall. He calls his girlfriend and then he hits a car, bounces, falls onto the ground and blinks an eye. No comments.
These details are good to see how bad the movie is, but 'Crank' itself is bad. The script is terrible and the scenes aren't interesting. Everything in the movie is stupid and very boring. The only way to properly describe this movie is saying it's bad, really bad.
When the movie ended, the girl who was sat next to me said it was the worst movie she had ever seen. I could only agree, as everyone did.
Please, never watch 'Crank' and try a good film or TV show instead.
Alatriste (2006)
Decent, but still a lost chance to make a great movie
Alatriste is one of the most known character from Spanish nowadays' literature. The books by Arturo Pérez Reverte are really good, so I was expecting a great epic film. 'Alatriste' is a decent movie but after watching it, I just could feel it's a lost chance to make one of the greatest Spanish movies.
The main mistake is inspiring this film in all the books. They could have made one film per book, and that saga would have been amazing! But the result of including so many stories is a confusing film (not that hard to follow if you've read the books, but the stories aren't developed and they dedicate a very short time to each important plot). They also include some things which aren't related to the books, which is annoying.
Viggo Mortensen was good as Alatriste. His voice was really ugly and sounded very weird, but I got quiet used to it at the end of the film. I think he did a good work disguising his Argentinian accent (he speaks with Argentinian accent when he speaks Spanish because he lived in South America). I personally think casting an actress as a male monk was a worse decision (it was so clear she was a woman).
So this film isn't that bad, but it isn't as good as it should have been. What a shame.
Perfume: The Story of a Murderer (2006)
A great adaptation of the novel
"Perfume" is a really enjoyable movie. However, I'd ask everyone to read the book before you watch it. The film is really loyal to the book (I didn't remember anything that was being missed when I was watching it, although I discover later some minor parts weren't included - don't worry, the most important plots appear perfectly). Well, there's something I'd like to remark - this movie starts with the end: since the beginning you know the main character is a murderer who is going to be executed. I wouldn't have made it like that if I'd made the movie, but it doesn't hurt. After that, we see Grenouille's life since we was born - just as it happens in the book. I specially like the part of Baldini - very good in both the book and the film, I guess that's because the film is *again* very loyal to the book. I guess the orgy scene is as it had to be shown, and I liked the true end - many people dislike it, but I think it fits to the book and the movie. Good actors, nice music and any other artistic stuff - I highly recommend "Perfume".
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - The Cradle of Life (2003)
Good as entertainment
This is a good action and adventures movie. It's really unrealistic, but who cares? Most stunts wouldn't be in the movie if it wasn't a video-game adaptation, but it doesn't matter - and they make the movie more enjoyable! Angelina Jolie is a great Lara Croft. She's a mix between Indiana Jones and Xena, and she reminds me of the TV heroine Sydney Fox in "Relic Hunter" (Sydney is obviously inspired in Tomb Raider's Lara). The other actors are OK, I don't really got impressed but I doubt the movie pretended that. The plot is in fact quite interesting, although not original at all (the evil guy wants to earn millions of dollars by selling a powerful biological weapon which is kept in Pandora's box). The places Lara visits (Greece, China, Africa...) are beautiful and are good choices (I love when she rides in her motorbike on the Great Chinese Wall). The end was good, I didn't think Lara would kill his mate in order to keep the world safe from Pandora's box.
To sum up, a very good movie if you just want entertainment.
Phone Booth (2002)
Awful and boring
"Phone Booth" doesn't really worth the effort, and I would only recommend it to an enemy. It isn't really long, but I found it so boring that I hoped it ended soon (I didn't stop watching it because it lasts less than 80 minutes, but how long they were for me!). The plot is simple, which isn't necessary bad, but in this movie it is. At first I thought it'd be interesting to know how everything gets resolved, but I soon realized it wasn't really interesting - it was so unreal! The actors (well, mainly just one actor) didn't strike me either. But the ending is clearly the worst part: the bad guy gets to escape from a highly-controlled-by-the-police hotel and he visits the 'hero' and talks to him and nobody notices it, and finally the bad guy escapes! As you can see the end is absolutely stupid, but I can't say I did really expect something better since the full movie was awful and boring. This film isn't entertaining nor interesting, and it's definitely the worst movie I've seen in months (or maybe years). You'd better spend your spare time doing something that worths the effort.
The Da Vinci Code (2006)
Entertaining
'The Da Vinci Code' was a revolutionary book a couple and a half years ago or so. Although it looks more like a movie script than a novel, and every book written by Dan Brown has the same plot with very few changes, it was addictive and it charmed readers from all around the world. I don't think you can believe anything Dan Brown states, but it's an entertaining book... and so the movie is.
It isn't a great film, but you can enjoy it and you won't feel bored with it. The cast is really good, and I have no complaint to make about it. It's quite accurate to the book; however, I'm surprised that many things are changed. Most of them are just moved from one point of the story to another, but others are harder to understand. For example, Sophie is red-haired in the book, but her hair is black in the movie. There are only one criptex in the movie instead of two, and Langdon and Sophie don't need to visit the library in London because they find everything they need by using a cell phone. The most important omission in the movie is that Sophie doesn't apparently discover her brother is alive. People who have read the book can easily identify him in the movie, he's obviously the young guy at Rosslyn, but this important plot (which is for me as important as the Grial plot) is missing. Another change is that Robert and Sophie's relationship was deeper in the book. The final scene, however, is perfect. This is the end in the book, which I like (although many people dislike it) and it's perfectly depicted in the movie.
The Village (2004)
A great movie, it shouldn't be underestimated
I didn't really like Signs, but Shyamalan's later movie, The Village, was a great surprise for me. It's a really good mystery film, however, it was promoted as a horror movie and that might make people feel weird when they watch it. It was a terrible mistake, but if you decide to see the film without prejudices, you'll surely enjoy it.
The cast was very good, specially Bryce Dallas Howard. I didn't know her until I watched this movie, but I love how she plays the blind girl. I love when she gets into the woods and is attacked by the fake monster. She knows the monsters weren't real, but she remembers that there were in fact legends about them. I also like the shocking ending, when we realize nothing in the movie were as we have thought.
I also like how colours appear in the movie. Red and yellow are good options to represent danger and security.
Xena: Warrior Princess (1995)
One of the best TV shows ever
"Xena: Warrior Princess" is one of the best TV show I've ever seen. The actors and actresses are so good, and all the episodes have a good story line. The action and the mythology are amazing.
Renée O'Connor played Gabrielle (she directed two episodes, too). Gabrielle started as an innocent peasant, but later she started to fight with her staff. Once she killed an evil woman and her life started to change... After her life as a "hippy", she became a great warrior, and in the last episode, she becomes as good as Xena. This change were possible because of Renée, a fantastic actress, who could played perfectly all the different Gabrielles.
Lucy Lawless played Xena. She could be the Warrior Princess that the TV show needed. She's a great actress.
Hudson Leick as Callisto and Kevin Smith as Ares were the bad people, the first a psycho-killer that became good and the second the God of War, evil deity who loved (and was loved by) Xena. He did good things, too.
Ted Raimi was Joxer, the perfect "friend-boyfriend" to Gabby. They were never a couple, but there were many kisses and "passion" scenes that make the two friends a funny pair.
Adrienne Wilkinson, as Eve, was the perfect evil Livia (Eve's Roman name) and the good daughter of Xena. She was only in a few episodes, but she's one of the most popular characters now.
There were a lot of other actors: Alexandra Tydings as Aphrodite, Paris Jeffeseron as Athena, Darien Takle as Cyrene, Bruce Campbell as Autolycus... All of them are brilliant.
"Xena: Warrior Princess" is a very popular TV show now. There are a lot of Xena fans, and the Internet has thousands of pages about the show and the actors that have become famous because of the show.