It is 1964, and New York-based producer Paul L. Jacobson, armed with a $200,000 budget and a cast assembled from the ranks of the Broadway stage, as well as a crew comprised of behind-the-scenes principals from the ranks of New York area television, has set out to create a big, large scale science fiction adventure starring ..... Santa Claus? There are many individuals who have, over the 30 or so years since Santa Claus Conquers the Martians was first released, tried to explore the many reasons why this particular story, so remarkably third-rate in terms of sets, scripting and even special effects, and yet, in one sense prophetic, given that the story foretells at one point the short attention span of the succeeding generation of children to come. Still, the adventure Santa shares with the Foster children, Billy and Betty, as they spend their time in the house dwelt in by Kimar, Momar and their kids, Bomar and Girmar, has a degree of suspense and dignity.
In the scenes taking place at the region called Chochem's Chair, the wise old Martian sage rants that the children of Mars are rising up in rebellion, for the simple reason that they have not yet discovered the meaning of fun. Only Santa Claus, Chochem proclaims, can provide such a meaning. For the remainder of the film, we follow Kimar and his crew, including hilarious Dropo, the laziest Martian of them all; and Voldar, the jealous, petulant angry person who sees Santa's presence as a potential threat to the Martian future.
There are many who have discussed young Pia Zadora and her appearance in this film --- and, frankly, these descriptions run the gamut from too cute to too campy and back again. Yet such descriptions are noted here because recently Penguin Books USA has published an unprecedented novelization of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, written by film historian Lou Harry. In his version, in which he uses approximately 90 per cent of the actual dialogue taken verbatim from the film itself, the story is presented from the perspective of a now grown-up Girmar, who has succeeded her father as ruler of Mars. Harry's Girmar narrates the tale in a sort of Valley Girl/Queen of Outer Space sort of dialect; indeed, her account of the film's concluding toyshop battle, wherein she and her brother, along with the Fosters, pummel Voldar with toy after toy, ultimately leaving him in tears, will send your funny bone into the stratosphere --- somewhat.
The final verdict has still not yet been fully written regarding Santa Claus Conquers the Martians --- there will be many more historians who will argue its reasons for being --- but one thing is certain: however many times one may call it a flop, there will be others who will wonder what producer Jacobson was "on," if you will, when he conceived the project. What will matter in the end is the simple question: Did you enjoy the movie already? If you did, wonderful; if not, well, who knows?
In the scenes taking place at the region called Chochem's Chair, the wise old Martian sage rants that the children of Mars are rising up in rebellion, for the simple reason that they have not yet discovered the meaning of fun. Only Santa Claus, Chochem proclaims, can provide such a meaning. For the remainder of the film, we follow Kimar and his crew, including hilarious Dropo, the laziest Martian of them all; and Voldar, the jealous, petulant angry person who sees Santa's presence as a potential threat to the Martian future.
There are many who have discussed young Pia Zadora and her appearance in this film --- and, frankly, these descriptions run the gamut from too cute to too campy and back again. Yet such descriptions are noted here because recently Penguin Books USA has published an unprecedented novelization of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, written by film historian Lou Harry. In his version, in which he uses approximately 90 per cent of the actual dialogue taken verbatim from the film itself, the story is presented from the perspective of a now grown-up Girmar, who has succeeded her father as ruler of Mars. Harry's Girmar narrates the tale in a sort of Valley Girl/Queen of Outer Space sort of dialect; indeed, her account of the film's concluding toyshop battle, wherein she and her brother, along with the Fosters, pummel Voldar with toy after toy, ultimately leaving him in tears, will send your funny bone into the stratosphere --- somewhat.
The final verdict has still not yet been fully written regarding Santa Claus Conquers the Martians --- there will be many more historians who will argue its reasons for being --- but one thing is certain: however many times one may call it a flop, there will be others who will wonder what producer Jacobson was "on," if you will, when he conceived the project. What will matter in the end is the simple question: Did you enjoy the movie already? If you did, wonderful; if not, well, who knows?
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