When it comes to movies, I scare easy. Real easy. I'm always the first idiot to scream in the movie theater- often I'm the only idiot screaming in the theater. I argue (unsuccessfully) with my fiancé to let me leave the lights on when we watch a horror flick at home. I flinch, I whimper, I cover my eyes with a throw pillow. At a showing of The Descent, I buried my face in my date's arm, only to have him yelp in confusion when I accidentally bit it in a moment of misplaced self-defense. I am a complete and utter wuss.
So when I say that this movie was far too ridiculous to be even mildly scary, you can believe me. I mean, heck, it was entertaining; but more in a "you've got to be %@$#ing kidding me" kind of way. Twenty minutes into the movie, I wasn't scared; I wasn't even nervous. I was incensed. I was watching young, healthy, apparently intelligent people getting their behinds handed to them by someone who looked like the local children's librarian. There were a thousand and one ways that this could have been a much shorter movie. It might, just maybe, have been believable if the antagonist had been anyone who didn't look like she had just stepped out of an advertisement for maple syrup; or if her intended victims had been prepubescent (well, maybe not; that kid from Home Alone would have had her beat for sure)- or perhaps bunnies, or hamsters, or blind, deaf, and dumb geriatric pirates missing both their wooden legs. There was one point when two healthy young women- one a mother defending her child- are being menaced by the real-estate-agent-gone-bad. They are both armed (one with a cleaver, one with a taser) and safely positioned behind a metal grate. The real estate agent has just lost her dominant hand, and is clutching her bleeding stump to her chest as she cackles and pokes at them weakly through the grating with a lead pipe. This struck me as more irritating than terrifying and it seems to me that any normal person would simply relieve her of the pipe through means of a simple fulcrum (since she squatting and poking it through the grate down at you, just pull down and you'd have the pipe) and then proceed to smile up at her and calmly ask just what the hell she planned to do now. If the antagonist had been some kind of evil genius, it would have been a different story, but she wasn't; she was almost laughably predictable and run-of-the-mill movie crazy.
One gets the feeling that this movie came to be because one of the writers lost a bet. "...ok, but if I win you have to write a movie about a crazy real estate agent in a little yellow raincoat. Oh, and dude, she has to look like your MOTHER."
Still, if you found the killer bunny scene in Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail to be funny (and who didn't?) you might enjoy it.
So when I say that this movie was far too ridiculous to be even mildly scary, you can believe me. I mean, heck, it was entertaining; but more in a "you've got to be %@$#ing kidding me" kind of way. Twenty minutes into the movie, I wasn't scared; I wasn't even nervous. I was incensed. I was watching young, healthy, apparently intelligent people getting their behinds handed to them by someone who looked like the local children's librarian. There were a thousand and one ways that this could have been a much shorter movie. It might, just maybe, have been believable if the antagonist had been anyone who didn't look like she had just stepped out of an advertisement for maple syrup; or if her intended victims had been prepubescent (well, maybe not; that kid from Home Alone would have had her beat for sure)- or perhaps bunnies, or hamsters, or blind, deaf, and dumb geriatric pirates missing both their wooden legs. There was one point when two healthy young women- one a mother defending her child- are being menaced by the real-estate-agent-gone-bad. They are both armed (one with a cleaver, one with a taser) and safely positioned behind a metal grate. The real estate agent has just lost her dominant hand, and is clutching her bleeding stump to her chest as she cackles and pokes at them weakly through the grating with a lead pipe. This struck me as more irritating than terrifying and it seems to me that any normal person would simply relieve her of the pipe through means of a simple fulcrum (since she squatting and poking it through the grate down at you, just pull down and you'd have the pipe) and then proceed to smile up at her and calmly ask just what the hell she planned to do now. If the antagonist had been some kind of evil genius, it would have been a different story, but she wasn't; she was almost laughably predictable and run-of-the-mill movie crazy.
One gets the feeling that this movie came to be because one of the writers lost a bet. "...ok, but if I win you have to write a movie about a crazy real estate agent in a little yellow raincoat. Oh, and dude, she has to look like your MOTHER."
Still, if you found the killer bunny scene in Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail to be funny (and who didn't?) you might enjoy it.