jensenholmesPA Reviews

The Holiday Sitter (2022 TV Movie)

Best Christmas movie so far in 2022

[9/10 · 12 December 2022]

I watch a ton of Christmas movies (Hallmark, Lifetime, Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu etc) and rank them on letterboxd. The UK movie "Christmas Number One" has been my top ranked movie for about 5 weeks now (out of 64 new movies so far this year).

Welp, it was just knocked off it's spot by THE HOLIDAY SITTER. I love this movie! I was looking forward to it as Hallmark's first Christmas movie featuring a gay lead couple. It didn't disappoint. It's light and funny and genuine with two gorgeous and sweet leads who have electric chemistry together.

The plot is a fish-out-of-water story about a guy who is roped into babysitting his neice and nephew for a few days before Christmas due to a family emergency. He has no idea what to do with kids but, fortunately, the hot guy next door loves children and is willing to lend a hand.

There's comedy, romance, and some genuine family feels. I loved the character arc of the lead who goes from "I never want to get married or have kids" to falling for the guy *and* the kids and family life. There's a moving discussion he has with his sister about the queen experience.

The script is quite good, but it's the leads who make this special. Thank you, Hallmark, Jonathan Bennett, and George Krissa for making this landmark movie so beautiful.

A Playful Romance (2021)

One of the best new holiday movies this 2022 season

[8/10 · 21 November 2022]

I wasn't expecting this to be one of my top tier of holiday movies this year, but here we are. I loved this. Let me count the ways.

First, an excellent script. So many of these holiday TV movies have manufactured drama and conflict, things that could easily be resolved if only people would just talk to each other. Not here. The conflict in this story is presented early on and the tension is kept up throughout. We have a true Scrooge of a villain, and she isn't a-kiddin'. Yet you can ultimately understand her motivation.

The conflict resolution in the final act is beautifully done with a Big Gesture that releases the tension/conflict in an authentic way. It made sense for the characters.

Second, there's the romance. Both leads are extremely appealing. They had great chemistry and fit well together as a couple. Jamie Perez as Riley truly sparkled. She had a strong and fun personality and was convincing as the director of a local theater company. Thomas McDonell as Sam was more laidback with a soft edge that worked with in contrast to her drive.

And then there was the A Christmas Carol theater production. I wanted to see more of it. We only got the a few short readings. But there was some nice caroling by the show's cast midway through that was impressive, and there were echoes of the Scrooge story in the main storyline.

All told, this is a keeper and is in my top five this season.

A Christmas Number One (2021)

An instant Christmas classic -- for grown-ups!

[10/10 · 9 November 2022]

I adored this movie so much. It's is an instant Christmas classic for me and one I will watch every year. It's the best holiday film so far in 2022 by a mile, and it'll be hard to knock it off it's (ahem) number one spot on my list.

I love it when Christmas movies include music. "Christmas Is All Around" by Billy Mack was the best bit in Love, Actually. Imagine an entire movie built around that and you have A Christmas Number One.

This is a super funny jab at the music industry. Megha, played by Frieda Pinto, is a female record producer who is moved to London to manage a boy band named Five Together. You can tell the guys in the Five Together had a blast spoofing a boy band, and they were so spot on. Their scenes were hilarious.

Five Together needs a Christmas song and Megha finds one when she runs across a video made by a little girl with cancer. It's a song her uncle, a heavy metal musician, wrote for her. The song itself is wonderful and we get several different versions of it during the film. The ending credits are not to be missed either.

This movie has romance, family love and heartbreak, lots of humor, and some killer musical numbers. It made me laugh and cry and want to heap laurels on its little movie head. I'm giving this all the stars, and I need the blu ray right now.

I agree with another reviewer -- I have NO idea why this movie is rated in the 5's. But trust me--you don't want to miss this one.

Well Suited for Christmas (2022 TV Movie)

Wonderful enemies-to-lovers romance with family feels

[8/10 · 7 November 2022]

This is my first Lifetime Christmas movie of 2022, and it's a winner. The focus is on the enemies-to-lovers romance of a hot entrepreneur bachelor who only wears black and an up-and-coming men's fashionwear designer whose signature is bold color.

This is a smart script. The conflict is immediate and seemingly insurmountable when Ms Color is assigned to dress Mr Black for a charity runway show. Both of them have a lot riding on it. Along the way, these two people at loggerheads learn more about each other and start to fall in love.

The foster kid angle was wonderful and her parents were delightful. There's something about a character who grew up without a family finally finding a family to belong to that adds an unmatched level of feels. This is a trope not uncommon in romance novels but I haven't seen it in a movie before.

Add on some lovely exterior scenes of NYC at Christmas, and gorgeous clothes, and you have a keeper.

Interview with the Vampire: In Throes of Increasing Wonder... (2022) Season 1, Episode 1

FInally, an INTERVIEW done right!

[9/10 · 2 October 2022]

I loved the novel of Interview with a Vampire and found the 1994 movie disappointing. The new series gets it right. The actor who plays Lestat (Sam Reid) fits the novel's character waaay better than Tom Cruise, and is mesmerizing onscreen. The new Louis is an interesting choice. The point of Louis is that he is incredibly sensitive and thus too squeamish for the life of a vampire. In this series, Louis is a tough guy running prostitutes in New Orleans. So it will be interesting to see how they develop his sensitive side later, but the actor is quite good. I loved the extended New Orleans storyline (which isn't in the book). The first episode is around 75 minutes long, and it all takes place before Louis is converted to a vampire, so there's a good bit of new story involving his family and business in New Orleans as well as Lestat's slow seduction.

The story is nicely updated for 2022 with mention of the pandemic, Louis currently living in Dubai, and a cynical older reporter. It's also more multiracial and more gay. While Rice's novel is certainly homoerotic, in the new series, Lestat's seduction is flat-out sexual. I was pleasantly surprised. Bring it.

Suffice it to say, I highly recommend this series to fans of Rice's work and look forward to the rest of the episodes.

Window Wonderland (2013 TV Movie)

One of the very best Hallmark Christmas romances

[9/10 · 10 November 2021]

9/10 STARS *on a Hallmark scale*

I've watched quite a few of the new 2021 Hallmark's this year, and this golden oldie from 2013 blows them out of the water.

Let's start with PAUL CAMPBELL, one of my favorite Hallmark leads. Gotta love a guy with a sense of humor, and Campbell is Hallmark's own version of Ryan Reynolds. Whether he improvised or this was just that good a script, he has lots of great banter and gags in this movie.

The theme of two competing window dressers at a big department store is fun, offering both a her-him competition and an artsy-crafty story. I also loved that the girl (Chyler Leigh playing Sloan Van Doren) came from a working class family and was trying to present herself as rich and cultured. Naomi Judd plays her bathroom-attendant mother to perfection. And, of course, Paul's character fits right in with her rowdy, fun, low-brow family (but Sloan's snobby fiancé does not). Matty Finochio is also a lot of fun as their department store boss.

If you like Hallmark Christmas movies, this one is not to be missed.

The Great Christmas Switch (2021 TV Movie)

Mediocre and underwhelming

[4/10 · 7 November 2021]

There were only about twenty times during this where I was shouting at the screen - JUST TELL THEM! It's not like switching places is a criminal act. So many things got royally screwed up because they were trying to keep this "secret" when there wasn't a good reason to keep it. Like, there legit wasn't a logical reason other than because the writers were trying to string it out. Super lazy writing. They could have come up with some kind of compelling rational that made the whole thing work better.

I also found the lead, Sarah Lind, not all that interesting as ONE character, much less as two. Just not especially charming/compelling/watchable/cute etc etc. Rather dull, IMHO.

As "twins switch places" movies go, this was truly mediocre and underwhelming.

I've watched all the new Hallmark and GAC movies so far this season (2021) and I'd say this is a the bottom of the list.

Raise a Glass to Love (2021 TV Movie)

8 stars *On the Hallmark Scale*

[8/10 · 3 November 2021]

This was excellent. Juan Pablo Di Pace as Marcello, the love interest, elevated this above most Hallmarks. He is authentic and so appealing as an Argentinian wine-maker working at a California vineyard. His acting was head's above more Hallmark hunks. The female lead, Laura Osnes, was decent in a typical Pollyanna kind of way. The romantic chemistry was spot on.

I enjoyed the California wine country scenery and the detailed wine sommelier theme. One of the best Hallmark's I've seen.

Much Ado About Christmas (2021 TV Movie)

Not a Hallmark-killer, but worth watching

[7/10 · 31 October 2021]

This first GAC Family Christmas movie has a lot riding on it. Bill Abbott left Hallmark (he was CEO of Crown Media) and went to GAC Family to recreate it (but, presumably, the 'old' Hallmark, before they cared about, you know, diversity).

So anywho, how was it? I'd say this movie out-Hallmaked Hallmark--which isn't necessarily all a good thing. Every scene was *Christmas done to the 9s*. Visually, they couldn't have crammed in one more nutcracker or ornament, and the production was high-end, glitzy, and perfect. So they nailed that. The female lead (Susie Abromeit) was very appealing. The male lead (Torrance Coombs) less so, but decent. I'd rank him in about the middle-to-low-end of current Hallmark male stars. The romance plot was fine. Nothing groundbreaking, and not as well-written as the 5 new Hallmark Christmas movies to debut so far this season, which have had above-par scripts for Hallmark (all except You, Me and the Christmas Trees, which was meh). But I liked the "billionaire/prince in reverse" angle because this time it was the girl who ws the secret heiress. (shocking, I know) And she was sweet.

There were some major annoyances. The story takes place in some mythical European (I think) town. Which apparently required all the American actors to use terrible British accents. I mean, BAD. And then the female lead's accent was 100% American despite her mother and everyone else n this city trying to sound British. So go figure that one, A few Christmas-y bits were way, way overdone in a bad way. I'm looking at you, Christmas karaoke scene. But the visuals were a feast of Christmas cheer and the romance had some sweet moments. The ending was as happy and glamorous as you could hope for.

So. Not a Hallmark-killer, at least not this movie. But worth watching once. And I'm all for even more choice in holiday fare.

The Santa Stakeout (2021 TV Movie)

Real feels in this zany caper rom-com

[8/10 · 25 October 2021]

This is a particularly good Hallmark. The male lead, Bill Campbell, is a natural comedian, and he really make this zany caper movie. The female lead, Tamera Mowry-Housley, was good too, and she had good chemistry with Campbell. There's a decent little mystery in the script as well as neighborly Christmas spirit that had genuine heart, and a rehabilitated con to tug the heartstrings. The best Hallmark holiday movie so far in 2021.

Christmas in My Heart (2021 TV Movie)

Very solid Hallmark movie

[7/10 · 24 October 2021]

I always enjoy it when Hallmark holiday movies include musicians and music. This one stars a country music star (Macfarlane) and classical violinist (Hemmens). There are a few musical numbers, which were terrific. I could have listened to a lot more of that.

Macfarlane also has a daughter he's raising alone, which introduces a nice family vibe to the romance. Grief is a theme as both the country music star and the violinist recently lost someone important. Both main characters are in multi-racial families, and the script actually brought up issues of racial identity (in a very light way) which I appreciated.

A really solid Hallmark movie worth keeping.

One con - Luke Macfarlane has a scene where he sings--there's a reason why he's an actor not a singer. But points to him for putting his heart into it.

Cinderella (I) (2021)

Super fun family movie - nice update to the classic

[8/10 · 5 September 2021]

I watched this with two little girls, and we all loved it. Great cast, great voices, and fun song choices. I loved the rapping town crier and the new spin on the evil stepmother. The evil stepsisters were memorable. Best ever fairy godmother. It had a brisk pace and didn't bore the kids (4 and 7). I'm surprised it's got so many negative reviews. Maybe the anti-woke police are trying to cancel it, I don't know. But I highly recommend!

Christmas Ever After (2020 TV Movie)

An average TV Christmas movie that earned an extra star for rep

[7/10 · 12 December 2020]

I watch a lot of Hallmark and Lifetime Christmas movies. So much so, I'm fairly jaded about them. Purely from the "TV Christmas movie" perspective, this is a decent one-time watch with a typical Christmas/snowy setting and appealing leads that had good chemistry together. The plot was minimal and unoriginal. A romance writer goes on a holiday retreat to help cure her writer's block. It turns out the inn's new owner looks just like the hero of her romances, as depicted on all the covers. He's also a single dad with a cute little girl in the mix.

This movie would have rated a 6/10 for me as a perfectly watchable TV Christmas romance. But it earned an additional star for having a female lead who is in a wheelchair. Interestingly, that never came up at all in the plotline. It was not a consideration in the romance or even mentioned by the love rival. I think that was a good call.

This movie will mean a great deal to many people. Thank you, Lifetime.

The Christmas House (2020 TV Movie)

Feel good family movie with nice diversity

[8/10 · 1 December 2020]

I was excited to watch the first Hallmark Christmas movie with gay couple (though I recall a lesbian couple in a recent one...). This is a feel good family movie with various subplots. The newly retired parents have grown apart, the actor son has career issues, and the younger, gay son and his husband are trying to adopt a baby. They all converge to put on a crazy, over-decorated house that's open to the public like they did years ago. Nice, feel good movie. I really enjoyed the inclusion of an LGBT storyline and that the couple was just a normal part of the family. Well done, Hallmark!

On the 12th Date of Christmas (2020 TV Movie)

Worth your time - Not the same old plotline!

[7/10 · 4 November 2020]

I'm glad to see a bit more creativity put into at least a few of the 2020 Hallmark Christmas movies. Typically the same plot is used over and over. But this one is unique and much better than average.

The plot involves two people who work for a game company who are put on a tight-deadline project to create a game for a new hotel in Chicago. They end up putting together a "12 days of Christmas" scavenger hunt that incorporates historic Chicago landmarks and neighborhoods. There were some clever poems/riddles as part of the game, and you get basically a travelogue of Chicago too. The leads were also both appealing and there was genuine chemistry with a nice romance arc.

This one deserves to go on regular rotation on your watch list.

I'm Thinking of Ending Things (2020)

If this film were a person, I'd unfriend them

[2/10 · 23 September 2020]

Pretentious, over-written, pseudo intellectual dross.... Ffs. Two people in a new relationship trying to out erudite each other by quoting everything from Woodsworth to physics. Who talks like this? No one. And if someone did, I'd want to get away from them ASAP. Which is exactly how I felt about this film. It was painful to watch.

I persevered, however, wondering if the ending would somehow give it meaning. It didn't. It was more half-*ssed than the rest of it. As in "there's no real story, and we have no idea how to end this stream-of-consciousness mess, so let's just throw an animated pig at the wall and see if it sticks."

I suppose this is the sort of movie that young wanna be intellectuals pat themselves on the back for adoring. Yeah. No.

Jimmy Kimmel Live!: Pete Buttigieg/Patrick Stewart/Tony Hale/Jhene Aiko/Miguel (2020) Season 18, Episode 26

A much needed laugh

[10/10 · 13 March 2020]

In this time of the plague (Coronavirus 3/12/20), I really needed something to smile about. Pete is a breath of fresh air. So nice to see him again after he dropped out of the presidential race and he was charming, smart, and endearing. The Star Trek nerd fest with Patrick Stewart was cute and the political monologue refreshing after such a tough primary battle. Thank you, Jimmy Kimmel.

The Ritual (I) (2017)

First great horror movie of 2018

[9/10 · 12 February 2018]

I loved every minute of this. I've done some long-distance hiking, so the fact that it was themed around a long-distance hiking trail in Sweden was cool enough right there. I loved the coward-to-badass character arc and the folk horror in the ancient woods. The special effects were amazing.

This is one for blu ray!

Love Always, Santa (2016 TV Movie)

The writing sparkles in this one

[8/10 · 22 January 2018]

I watch a lot of Hallmark movies and enjoy them, but it's always a great pleasure when one rises above the fold and turns out to be much better than expected. That's the case with this one.

The lead actors are appealing, the romantic chemistry is good, and the premise of the little girl writing to Santa, who writes back and then falls for the mom--that's all good. But what makes it so much better than average is the humor in the script.

I *loved* the various side characters like the hero's best friend, who is always making sarcastic quips about marriage and kids (but really loves his own family). The heroine's sister's husband and his buddy, Randy, are obsessed with a potato shooting contest. Randy is such a crazy guy, he practically deserves a series of his own. Brilliant! Then there's the heroine's Hemingway-themed cafe, called The Bun Also Rises, with menu items like To Ham and Ham Not and The Old Man and the Tea.

The ending with the magical Christmas barn and sleigh was tongue-in-cheek about all the Hallmark Christmas smaltz, yet in a fond way. It worked.

There are a few Hallmarks that stand out due to really good scripts -- I love Seven Year Hitch (2012) and Naughty Or Nice (2012). This movie goes to the top of the heap for me. In fact, I even looked up the writers and am seeking out more of their movies. I've never done that.

Watch it!

Frozen in Love (2018 TV Movie)

Not a great Hallmark romance

[5/10 · 22 January 2018]

I was looking forward to all of the 2018 Winterfest movies. So for the only one I've liked is Love on the Slopes. (Though I have high hopes for Winter's Dream with Dean Cain).

In Frozen in Love, I found the female lead, Rachel Leigh Cook, really annoying. I love books and bookstores and libraries, but she was just ridiculous with her adament clinging to the past and refusal to do anything to help her bookstore modernize and survive. Her immediate antagonism for a guy who just wants a freaking cup of coffee comes off as extremely bitchy and rude. For the first half of the movie, she was just so over-the-top snotty. Yes, I know romances need to show character growth, but in this case, it was too extremely and unrealistic. and it made me dislike her character so much, I didn't want the guy to fall for her.

I never felt the chemistry between these characters. Nor did it make sense to me a big time jock would fall for this small-minded, snobby woman. Why?

The male lead (Niall Matter) was good despite this. I would definitely watch another movie with him as the co-star.

The plot is also problematic. A famous bad-boy athlete is paired with a little indie bookshop as a PR stunt to help his rep? Why? This makes no sense to me. And then the way he dumps the store at the end -- a typical romance "angst point" ruse -- just didn't work. It didn't make sense that his team manager would put him on this PR stunt in the first place, and then pull him out of it at the last moment. Wouldn't that further hurt his rep?

Overall, this not one of the better Hallmarks. There are plenty of others to watch. Take a pass on this one.

Love on the Slopes (2018 TV Movie)

Fantastic scenery makes this Hallmark

[7/10 · 22 January 2018]

Hallmark is great at making setting an important part of the movie, but this particular film does that in spades. There's incredible snowy mountain scenery here, especially in the scene where Alex and Cole zipline across a canyon above an icy river. Just gorgeous. Seriously, this is worth watching for the scenery alone.

As for the romance, I liked the leads, even if Alex's girly "I'm so not sporty" was a bit ridiculous initially. The premise of having her do a lot of winter-y extreme sports allowed for breathtaking vistas and for her to cling to manly extreme sports guide, Cole. The chemistry was pretty good, especially towards the end. The script was serviceable.

All in all, one I will rewatch. The leads are attractive and appealing enough that the romance was decent. But it's mainly the setting that puts this one over the top for me.

One Winter Weekend (2018 TV Movie)

Not a Hallmark I'll rewatch

[5/10 · 22 January 2018]

I watch a lot of Hallmark movies. I love the winter theme of the four "Winterfest" movies of 2018. This film is mostly set at a ski resort. The scenery is wonderful and the snowboarding theme is fun. The production is very slick. But I didn't feel much real "heart" or chemistry in this movie.

I think where it fell short for me was in the lead actress, Taylor Cole. She seemed like an ice princess (no pun intended), very cold and distant and bitchy. Especially bitchy and princess-y at first. Even once she "warmed up" in the storyline, she still struck me as someone I wouldn't like in real life. Kind of a "mean girl" vibe. The lead actor, Jack Turner, was good but not memorable. Maybe it was because of the lead actress he had to work with.

For me in these Hallmarks, I find two things can push them from serviceable to ones I love and will rewatch. The first thing is the script. I love the particularly witty or funny scripts like the recent "Love Always, Santa" or "The Seven Year Hitch". The second thing is the lead actors and their chemistry. For example in "Broadcasting Christmas", I loved the quirky and warm Melissa Joan Hart and the ever-boy-next-door Dean Cain. In the case of 'One Winter Weekend', the script never rose above formula, the lead female was not likeable, and I wasn't feeling the chemistry between the leads.

On the plus side, I liked the side romance with the bffs, Rukiya Bernard and Dewshane Williams. She's super cute and I hope she does more Hallmark.

In sum: If you love Hallmark, worth watching once, but I won't be saving this one.

Inside (2007)

Watch only if you love the idea of a pregnant woman being unrelentingly tortured

[1/10 · 28 December 2017]

Gods, this movie was nothing but gore, gore, gore and unrelenting trauma. There was not a spark of relief through the entire thing, and the ending was the worst possible place it could go.

I'm a writer, and I'm very familiar with beats in story. Normally you want a story to have an up and down beat pattern to hold interest. Or at least an occassional up beat to give some depth to the emotional experience. Yes, even in horror. I'm a fan of horror comedy, but even straight horror has some moments when the good guys get a break or there's some bonding or hope or *something*.

I guess this is "edgy" French cinema because I swear there was not a truly positive beat in the entire thing. Yes there were a few times when it looks like the villain might be stopped, but after the first time that fails, and so illogically too, it was obvious that any new character would be introduced into the scene simply in order to have another body to kill, and that the filmmaker's intention was to have the villain magically evade any attempt to derail her. And that's just what happens.

The one time the pregnant victim grows some balls and looks like she'll fight back, which would have made this SUCH a better film, that moment is quickly wasted and leads to only more gore and torture for her. Like, hello? If you have the beaten-to-hell victim get up and grab a weapon with murder in her eye, DO SOMETHING WITH IT. But alas no. She has the villain at her mercy and does nothing. And then, illogically, yet a different character steps in and beats her down. Because... variety! Let someone else bash the pregnant belly for a change! Whee!

As other reviewers have pointed out, all the characters do stupid things in order to allow the villain to keep going and going, including 3 cops and the protagonist multiple times. The cops are the worst. None of them ever call for backup or respond with true caution, not even when one cop is screaming downstairs as he's being murdered and the other cop is exploring upstairs. Are we to assume the stairwell is somehow magically soundproof? Because, similarly, the pregnant victim upstairs never seems to be aware there is anyone else in the house and never, you know, calls to them for help or recognizes the voices of her friend or her mother who is right outside the bathroom door.

The last cop was the worst though. During every action of his I was screaming what an idiot he was. How could he not call for back up? But even if you accept that he had the training and instinct of a two year old, even that doesn't explain why, with 3 cops and a perp missing, the precinct never sends another car out to check up on them. Talk about lazy writing. Can you not come up with a scenario and actions that actually MAKE SENSE?

I won't even get into the misogyny aspect here with a pregnant woman undergoing more torture than you can imagine and finally having the baby dug out of here. Ugh. Why? Making the villain a female erases none of the bile of this ultimate abuse of women.

I was counting the minutes until it was over. In sum, not recommended unless you love torture porn and love the idea of seeing a pregnant woman abused unrelentingly.

As Above, So Below (2014)

On my 'all time favorite' list

[10/10 · 29 March 2015]

Seeing this crop up on a few 'years best' horror lists, I decided to give it a try. It was WAY better than I expected. My husband and I both loved it. The metaphysical aspects of the story (philosopher's stone, alchemy, esoteric occult philosophy) was integrated in a deep way into the structure of the film and of the fabric of the Paris underground. It was much more intelligent than most horror films ever try to be. Whereas so many horror films fail when they reveal the monster at the end, this film exceeds expectation. The last quarter of the underground were genuinely original and terrifying and the ending was perfection. There were several spots where I jumped/screamed, which is unusual for me since I've seen so many horror films. But beyond the solid execution and genuine thrills, I really love this film for the interesting integration of real occult philosophy. If you like Dan Brown metaphysical thrillers, you'll like this. This one goes on my all time favorites list!

Honor Student (2014 TV Movie)

Horrible ending

[2/10 · 13 March 2015]

This suspense film looked good in the trailer so my husband and I watched it. For about 90% of the film, I would have rated it a 6. It is a typical female stalker type thriller and the stalker actress (the 'student') is pretty damn scary.

However, the ending of this film bumps this down to a dismal 2. I literally screamed at the TV. It's like the network or director decided to go for an upbeat ending at the last second, and changed the last two pages of the screenplay. Nothing that comes before makes the ending credible in any way. Horrible. Truly horrible. It would be like Fatal Attraction ending with the couple engaged in a happy polygamous relationship with the Glenn Close character after she'd killed their bunny and everything else.

No. Just no.