mariarammstein Reviews

Schitt's Creek (2015–2020)

I don't see it !!!!

[5/10 · 4 March 2024]

I like: Modern Family, Arrested Development, 30 Rock, Seinfeld, Louie, Friends, the Charlie Sheen seasons of Two and a Half Men, Louis CK, Jerry Seinfeld, the Bernie Mac Show, George Carlin, Chris Rock, Bill Hicks, Everybody Hates Chris, Veep, the New Adventures of Old Christine, Get a life, Malcolm in the Middle, Ricky Gervais, Extras, the Office, Alan Carr, Sarah Millican, After Life, Web Therapy, Family Guy, the Simpsons, I loved Best in Show, Dave Chappelle, and I am sure I'm forgetting some shows or comedians.

But I cannot even smile at this show. It's not horrible, but I can't get into it. I was hopefull because of the 8.5 score but i just don't see it.

5 for effort ?

Blood Red Sky (2021)

Entertaining is what it's all about

[10/10 · 26 August 2023]

And you thought snakes on a plane are scary !

Wait untill the vampires board.

A vampire mom boards a transatlantic flight to New York with her son, to get a cure for her vampire ....... eh ....... curse I guess ?

The stewards ( who's in the hijack-plot) over-acting is a bit annoying, but overall this German American thriller slash horror movie, is absolutely worth your time, if you just want to be entertained in action, thriller, vampires and horror.

The finale is both surprising and satisfying.

Having said that, it could easily have a sequel. And I'm almost certain there will be.

And I will watch it.

Unfriended (2014)

Not for the elderly

[8/10 · 24 August 2023]

The critics are really awful about this movie and I can only think of one reason: age.

The idea for this movie is excellent, the result is fun to watch IF you skype or face time or group chat too.

If not, this movie might go over your head.

The movie is not boring at all, if you pay attention to detail.

A movie about on-line supernatural was about to become a thing, ofcourse, and the end is expectable and a surprise in one.

I liked watching it and I wish the so-called critics would be a bit more flexible in their reviews, since this is clearly a movie for people who get the social media dilemmas.

Insecure (2016–2021)

Absoltely Fabulous

[10/10 · 19 August 2023]

Atlanta, Insecure, I don't know who was first, but I see similarities in cinematography. It's a bit faster than Atlanta but there is a vibe that both series have, funny at times, seriously when needed.

A must watch for both men and women.

Don't be put off by the "immaturite" reviews, written by the wannabe critics here, who seem to have the "being adult" under controll or think they have.

For the peeps who are growing older and have their lives so called under control, with careers, families and all that we are supposed to have at a certain age, well, good for them.

We're not all there yet, some of us may never get there.

This is your must watch.

The Invitation (II) (2022)

Remember when a horror movie was a horror movie ?

[6/10 · 14 June 2023]

This is not horror. This is a cross between all vampire movies and television series and Bridgerton.

Predictable, almost every scene is from another (horror) movie, all has been there and done that.

An entertaining flick to play in the backround at a Halloween party, you can skip entire parts and still get the gist of it.

Netflix compares it with "Midsommar" which is a stretch, and an insult to be honest. "Midsommar" is a gem of a movie which didn't need jumpscares or darkness to make it an amazing movie. The Invitation needs it, bad.

Not very bad but a dime a dozen nowadays.

Entertaining, but nothing more.

Slasher: Night of Hunters (2017) Season 2, Episode 4

If you want to dump someone ...

[7/10 · 1 June 2023]

...... don't tell them in the middle of nowhere, do it at a gasstation without giving them a heads up, or leave them a note explaining why you dumped them if you must.

Especially if he dumpee is a guy you met in prison, who forced you to be his "mate" and gives you a vibe that if you do not do what he says, he might do you harm or even worse, he might kill you.

But it wouldn't be a scary scene in a quite entertaining horror series if you did.

It's a more logical series that American Horror Story, seasons and episodes are not all equally good and some decisions by the main characters are questionable but if the characters used common sense, this series wouldn't exist.

Beef (2023– )

He who angers you, controls you

[10/10 · 8 April 2023]

This is an amazing series. A must watch, and you can't really stop watching.

Sometimes a gem like this pops up and makes you see the art of creating amazing television. Great acting by the entire cast, it has a bit of an "Atlanta" feel (another gem in the history of television): funny, poignant, realistic, relatable, ridiculous and binge-worthy.

Plus, I am a sucker for a good soundtrack.

The trailer sets the story, how the entire "thing" starts but as you get pulled in the more out of hand it gets. It's one of those shows you keep thinking about and, if you're a roadrager as are a lot of people, you see how stupid you really are.

Luther: The Fallen Sun (2023)

Ignore the wannabe movie critics

[10/10 · 12 March 2023]

It's a great watch. Ofcourse there are plotholes, some things are farfetched, it's not like the series because series last longer than a movie, ofcourse you don't go to Sweden in a trenchcoat like Luther's and sure there are chlichés, it might even be a bit predictable, a dirty cop on the inside, the daughter of the police chief will be kidnapped by the scary villain but ffs it's a movie, make belief no matter how realistic crime can be. And an entertaining one, scary at times but not one you look away from to get a drink or have a leak without pausing. It won't win an Oscar, it's a follow up on a damn good series and I would have preferred a series aswell.

You can't always get what you want.

But it's a damn good movie.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: The Book of Esther (2018) Season 19, Episode 20

Carrie

[7/10 · 25 February 2023]

Episode with a pretty good story, great acting by Giddish and McKinnon, the Esther character has an extremely high "Carrie" vibe, a bit of an unnecessarry stereo typing, and some other things that were way too "out there". Asking a dumpstore salesman for a list of buyers of a certain type of coat is also not very believable and is more of an administrative, desk job, and I really don't mind that some episodes are kind of based om stories you once read in the paper or saw on the news. It makes you look up some cases you may have forgotten about long ago.

It's just that the times Rollins is going rogue is getting old.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Maternal Instincts (2015) Season 17, Episode 6

Unbelievable

[1/10 · 18 January 2023]

These episodes are highly obnoxious and just plain bad: badly acted (the flutist, the mom, the sister, Rollins herself). It's a waste of an episode, a waste of a storyline and a waste of time.

The storyline is very far fetched - they arrest people for less - and Rollins' gullibility is annoying. The actress that plays Rollin's mother thinks she is on Golden Girls, and the actress that plays the sister isn't even fit for an after-school special.

I like to watch this series in spite of its predictability, but this is an episode you can skip without missing a beat, and an insult of sorts to its audience.

Bodies Bodies Bodies (2022)

The plot is great, but the road to the end is tedious

[3/10 · 1 November 2022]

With a few exceptions, Dutch directors are so obviously present in their movies. Paul Verhoeven's fingerprints all over this. Sex or make out scenes, cursing and now, overusing the social media trope, the drugs, booze and super woke characters, just that bit over the top that it irritates instead of getting you to bond with a or the characters - they could've all been killed, I wouldn't care - or the movie.

The story is light, the dialogues are as superficial as the characters and if you're not into this generations way of socializing, this movie will just annoy the hell out of you.

I had such high hopes for this movie, I absolutely bought into the buzz about this movie but it disappointed, I'm disappointed.

Sea of Time (2022)

A Dutch film about if time heals wounds

[6/10 · 15 October 2022]

The movie, based on a true story, consists iof two parts: past and present. A young, very much in love couple, Johanna and and their 5 year old son Kai, sail across the seas, when their son dissappears. The footage of Kai is real footage of Mikel, the boy who this true story is about. The search for Kai is impossoble, heartbreaking and without any hope.

The moment the have to sail back home and leave Kai behind in a way, is very though to watch.

Through the excruciating pain, they are incapable to communicate. She thinks he moves on too fast and doesn;t want a second child, which Johanna can't fathom, and they separate.

After 40 years without any contact Johanna has to find out through media that Lucas is planning to direct a play about Kai. She is.outraged by his plan and goes to confront him about him using their mutual loss without letting her know.

There they finally are able to talk about their grief, what happened and talk about Kai.

An unnecessary plottwist at the end, the music is overly dramatic, the acting is superb (if you can handle Dutch (over) acting).

Zee van tijd is translated "sea of time" but in Dutch it also means to have "all the time in te world".

The role of young Lucas is played by the son of the actor who plays the old Lucas.

Monster (2022–2024)

"Y'all did nothing !!!"

[10/10 · 27 September 2022]

If you know the story of Jeffrey Dahmer, there are no spoilers. If you don't, there are spoilers in my review.

A must watch, great acting, in a true story about an evil human being that walked the earth scot-free for a awful long time before he got caught.

The Dahmer story in ten gutwrenching episodes. The failure of the police to follow up on calls that were made by his neighbour Glenda Cleveland. The neighbour that was dismissed a thousand times and had they listened, there could have, would have, should have been less victims.

There is some great acting by Evan Peters because at no point you feel bad for Dahmer, or even relate a little bit. Richard Jenkins as his dad, Lionel Dahmer, gives a great performance aswell, and Niecy Nash as the ignored neighbour Glenda Cleveland aces her part.

You can almost smell the decay, sweat, stench, mold and the bloodsoaked matrass but the worst smell of the entire series is the story about how this Dahmer got away with his crimes for so long, and how little there was done for the (families of) boys and men who went missing, and how little there was done by authorities for the victims, letting each person who watches this, to have an opinion on who is to blame, if any. But the real 911 call by Glenda at the end of one of the episodes, is witness to the devil may care attitude by the authorities involved, because (so it seems) it was all happening in the black, poor and gay community. So no one, except for her, really cared.

All in all an amazing story telling by. Ryan Murphy (why, at first, I thought they would steer from the true story but the absolutely did not) about a serial killer that didn't have to make so many victims, had they listened to Glenda. Cleveland in the first place.

There are no spoilers for people who know the story. And one can go into detail about the disorders Dahmer may have suffered from, but sometimes some people are just plain evil.

This story does not claim anything about what might have been, or gone wrong with him, it just tells the story of an evil man that for a long time, got away with murder.

Clusterf**k: Woodstock '99 (2022)

The documentary is well made, but it leaves you feeling angry, sad and angry again

[8/10 · 3 August 2022]

On one hand a must watch, on the other an enraging documentary.

Watching this, and growing up the ninetees music era, enjoying it to its fullest, I can't help but wonder what has become of all the godfearing American people that were there. Environmentalists ? Bankers ? Homeless ? Family men ? Soccer moms ? Politicians

Some people who participated to this documentary still seem to find it all very funny

You do get to see how Beavis and Butthead are doing these days. They aged terribly.

The first title of this documentairy would have been a much better fit, "trainwreck" is way too mellow for this huge disaster. Greed, lust, pride.gluttony, wrath, sloth and a lot of drugs, alcohol and no water respectivily crowd and organisation, all present.

Add a couple of artists, bands that are contributing, enthousiasming the chaos and violence

The concert industry must have learned a lot of this "how not to organize a festival" Woodstock 99 disaster although I wonder if they really learned a lesson, especially when money becomes the main goal. Hence Love Parade Germany, Astroworld.

It's a miracle "only" three people died.

This is hard to rate: the docu is painting a realistic picture, but the content is horrible, so the rating is purely for the quality of the series.

Call Me Kat (2021–2023)

Don't blame Miranda !!!

[3/10 · 11 June 2022]

Not every BBC sitcom is fit for a US adaption or vice versa. It's not the cast's fault, blame the people who wanted a US version.

While "Miranda" is a very funny show, at least the first two seasons, this is not. You can't blame them for trying, but it's not working.

The mom is too much, while Miranda's mom is more. And so on.

Watch "Miranda" instead, that's really funny.

Three points for trying.

Rammstein: Angst (2022 Music Video)

Angst - Fear

[10/10 · 5 May 2022]

A parody on todays society of fear, directed by Robert Gwisdek, also known for Rammsteins "Zeit" video. The track is from the 2022 8th studio album "Zeit" (time) which was released at the 28th of April in cinemas worldwide, and for ale as of the 29th of that same month.

Clark (2022)

Bill Skarsgård plus Jonas Åkerlund = magic

[10/10 · 5 May 2022]

Amazing, fast, funny, harsh, hilarious at times, dry humor, bombastic, black humor, you name it, they checked all the boxes. Binge-worthy !

Based on a true character but not a thing you must know. Cinematographic masterpiece, Bill Skarsgård obviously had fun making this role his own.

I won't go into the story, but I highly recommend it.

Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)

I LOVE this movie !!! Wanna laugh ? Watch this.

[10/10 · 2 April 2022]

From the first time I saw it up to now, over twenty years later. Every couple of years I rewatch it and it always makes me laugh out loud. Denise Richrards psycho rich spoiled girl, Brittany Murphy's laugh, Allyson Janney's trailer trashy friend of Ellen Barkin trailer trash mum of Kirstin Dunst, with their hearts in a good place, Will Sasso' as. The slow but freaking funny judges brothers, all the actors and actresses are giving great performances and it seems the entire cast and crew had fun making this comedy.

The end is a bit far fetched but it's a very, very enjoyable watch.

Love it !!!!!!

Bad Times at the El Royale (2018)

Just a good movie

[9/10 · 6 March 2022]

An entertaining movie through and through. It starts weird, it evolves weird, flashbacks and kind of a happy end, great acting, magnificent atmosphere, a bit of this, a bit of that, leaves a couple of questions, and an overall enjoyable experience.

Extant: Change Scenario (2015) Season 2, Episode 1

So Negan meets the Governor, while Lucille and Jessie .....

[8/10 · 26 February 2022]

Not being into science fiction - although a lot of is where we are today ....- Jeffrey Dean Morgan lights up any series, and seeing the Walking Dead connections is fun to watch. Hally Berry is not convincing as an astronaut but has the "I'm not crazy-crazy" absolutely up to par.

Entertaining enough, thrilling at times, even funny and all the beautiful people makes it a great watch.

I'll probably catch more Walking dead actors in the other episodes, who knows ...

Days of Wrath (2008)

Where is it ???

[10/10 · 27 January 2022]

Anyone ? Where did it go ? Has i t vanished into thin air ? It's not on any streaming service, not on DVD, not in cinemas. Is it that bad, or is it that good ? Is it an urban myth ? Yes, I had to make this into one hundred and fifty characters so .... anyone ???

Let the Right One In (2008)

A freakishly Beautifull Must-See !!!!

[10/10 · 26 January 2022]

Please check this movie out for yourself, it is just impossible to write a review on it. Dramatic, sweet, gory, beautifull. I found this through a You Tube comment on a whole other subject and am so glad I did.

Just watch it, you will not be dissappointed.

Texas Rising (2015)

Just enjoy

[10/10 · 23 January 2022]

Amazingly entertaining, might not be historicly accurate but to hell with that. Modern old fashioned, highly enjoyable, good actors, a soda and some popcorn and you're set for a great evening. Or a few evenings.

Normal People (2020)

Boring very soft porn

[4/10 · 28 December 2021]

So a guy kisses you and than ignores you at school, stops by your house and ofcourse you have sex, oh , and he thinks you're very pretty by the way. Are the Irish really that simple ?

Maybe this is for the young people, I don't know.

Don't Look Up (2021)

Good acting, but could have gone without the Ariana Grande song

[6/10 · 25 December 2021]

It's an entertaining film, and a happy end would have been a bummer, but the not happy ending is a big bummer. Not a good movie to watch while in a pandemic lockdown during the Holiday Season though.