71vwsquareback Reviews

Down to You (2000)

Blech!

[2/10 · 19 December 2002]

Tripe! This movie was boring and poorly acted. It seemed like the "actors" were reading through the script while getting their nails done or something.

I didn't care a bit about any of the characters, and in fact I wanted to clunk their heads together half of the time. The situations were unrealistic, and having 25 year olds playing 18 year olds just never works. And The Fonz as a T.V. chef was mind-bogglingly bad. Yuck,yuck,yuck.

All in all, quite possibly the most ill conceived, badly acted, boring junk I have ever had the misfortune to see. And I saw Men In Black II... 1 out of 10

8 Mile (2002)

What's going on here...?

[11 November 2002]

Have any of you noticed Eminem's name in the movie bears a strong resemblance to the main character's in the movie The Commitments? The lead in that film was named Jimmy Rabbitte Jr...just a little odd, don't you think, considering the similar jist of both the movies.(Lower class guy has dreams of making it big; one in Ireland, and one in the US.) Don't get me wrong. I am not even trying to compare the hilarious, well executed movie The Commitments with this flash-in-the-pan film, but I wonder if the script writers were maybe Roddy Doyle fans. (For those of you who read out there, I highly recommend reading Doyle's Barrytown Trilogy books.) Bottom line, if you are a big Eminem fan, go see it. You probably already have. Personally, I think he's horrible, so if you agree with that point of view, don't go see it and rent The Commitments instead.

Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)

It's mind-numbing

[9 September 2002]

This may be the worst film ever made. I take that back. This IS the worst film ever made.(and I've seen Laser Blaster) If not for Joel and the 'bots I would not have made it through. Perhaps you don't understand...this movie is "Bad and wrong...In fact, there should be some other, worse word for it. Like...badong. Yes. This movie is badong." The sketchy plot line is this: Unemotional family takes a boring road trip through miles and miles and miles of farmland. Luckily you're right there with them to enjoy every excruciating mile of scenery. Unemotional family gets lost in what appears to be the desert. They find a house, ask for directions from Torgo(enter theme music) and decide that this drunken, big kneed goober taking care of the house while the "master" is away should give them someplace to stay and fetch their bags and whatnot. But croaks Torgo,"the master will not be pleased." Mayhem ensues. Well, not really mayhem, but something like a watered down version of mayhem ensues when the master shows up. A dog dies. A man gets tied to a tree and slapped in the face. Some ladies wrestle around in see-through nighties and huge panties and bras and Torgo's hand is set afire. All the while this bleating, screeching, dying saxophone is making noise in the background.

But I digress. Please don't watch this movie without the help of MST3K. You'll never make it. My husband couldn't even make it through with MST3K's help. If you are serious about having seen the world's worst movie, watch this one. If you're not tough as nails, don't bother. Rent MIB II and feel secure in the knowledge that you're watching the world's second worst movie and leave it at that.

Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)

yah, sure it's a goot movie

[5 August 2002]

Being from Minne-sohtah, I couldn't have asked for a better parody of the state, the people, and the whole beauty pageant thing. It's a great dark comedy with wonderful acting and accents(minus Denise Richards who can seemingly act only one way...badly). It's fun and light-hearted, taking even touchy subjects and making them goofy enough to laugh at. I recommend this movie as a 9 out of 10. And for anyone who hasn't ever eaten bars and hotdish in a church basement or community center in small town Minnesota, this movie makes you feel like you are really there... Lucky you.

The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

refreshingly strange, or strangely refreshing

[10/10 · 1 August 2002]

This movie seemed like a breath of fresh air. Amid all the cookie-cutter movies coming out of la-la land, this little gem is unique and interesting. It's not meant to be a laugh a minute comedy, but a sort of understated, quirky, chuckle to yourself movie. I liked this movie because it's different. The soundtrack is really good, too. If you like a good, odd movie, then this is the best and oddest to come along in awhile. There are a lot of reviews likening this one to Rushmore, and while it's similar in it's look and feel, I liked the characters in The Royal Tenenbaums more. I also thought that this movie had a better ending than Rushmore. All in all this is a very entertaining movie that I am going to watch again. In fact, I thik I'll go watch it right now.

Men in Black II (2002)

Men That Lack II

[4/10 · 1 August 2002]

I cannot believe that I paid money to see this drivel. The actors seemed to be sleep walking through their parts, and nothing about it was funny. Nothing. The ONLY laugh our theater got was when the chair my husband was sitting in broke and he fell on the floor. All the "cute" characters were utterly annoying (Frank the dog first and foremost) and the plot was muddy and confusing. I have never been so disappointed after leaving a theater. The really annoying thing is that the first one was very entertaining. I know that sequels normally lack a little of the first, but come on! It was like this movie was written by a second grade class. Not good. Not good at all. Please do not see this movie in the theater. Think about passing it up on the rental shelf as well. Rent the original instead and save yourself from wasting precious time on the sequel.