sjbradford Reviews

The Brady Bunch: My Fair Opponent (1972) Season 3, Episode 22

Not on streaming due to "Moon River"

[1 October 2023]

One of the other reviewers was wondering why this episode isn't available to stream. It's almost certainly due to the use of an instrumental version of the popular song "Moon River" in the scene where Mike is teaching Marcia to waltz. My guess is that our friends at Paramount aren't willing to shell out for the streaming rights to that song, so the episode is excluded. They could just cut the scene, or put some generic waltz in, but I guess it's not worth the trouble for a 50-year-old episode. You can still catch this episode on MeTV, though - Paramount must have locked up the song for broadcast.

This episode is a little silly, the way Molly goes from mouseburger to popular girl to total B in about a week. I wish they had done a sequel episode where Marcia turned Molly back into a nerd. But the Brady Bunch was never big on returning guest stars. Or retribution, for that matter.

Air (I) (2023)

Enjoyable, but Ben Affleck is a hammy distraction

[7/10 · 23 April 2023]

This is an enjoyable docudrama about how Nike and Michael Jordan partnered in the 1980s to offer the most successful sneaker line of all time. Matt Damon does a fine job as the Nike executive who spearheads the seemingly impossible task of signing Jordan, who greatly prefers competitor Adidas. And Viola Davis is terrific as Jordan's mother, who is the decision maker in their family.

The weak points? Ben Affleck's acting and directing. Affleck chews the scenery as Nike's CEO. You never forget for a second that you're watching Affleck trying mightily to turn in a showy performance. Every time he shows up, it takes you out of the movie. Affleck's directing is also heavy-handed, as he squeezes in every 1980s cliche imaginable.

All in all, the writer did an excellent job of turning what could have been boring subject matter into an entertaining two hours. It just could have been better with a more subtle director. And make sure to steel yourself for when Affleck shows up.

The Partridge Family: Partridge Up a Pear Tree (1971) Season 1, Episode 21

Shirley is smug and unlikeable in this one

[25 February 2023]

The plot, in a nutshell: Keith doesn't have enough money to take his girlfriend to the prom. I find it amazing that the Partridge kids work as performers and stingy mom won't give them a reasonable allowance from their own earnings. The excuse is that they need to save it all for college. But come on.

The worst is when Shirley smugly tells Keith that he should get a job. This from the son who is the lead singer of their group and writes a majority - if not all - of their songs. He already has a job, Shirley. And he's helping to support your unlikeable behind.

And at the end Shirley praises Keith for showing "a twinge of responsibility." Yep, because working as a performer shows no responsibility at all.

Old (2021)

Should have been called "The Crazy Island of Annoying People"

[6/10 · 2 January 2023]

This is an interesting concept for a movie: tourists are lured by an unscrupulous entity to a beach where the aging process is greatly sped up. The problem? Many of the characters are generally unpleasant, often played by actors who lack charisma (diversity seemed to be the most important factor in the casting).

The dialogue isn't great either. And the ending is particularly problematic: the representative of this evil corporation performing experiments on humans just stands back, exposed, when he and his team greatly outnumber those who have exposed them. They had no problem sending these Guinea pigs to their death on the beach. So why are they just standing down at the end without a fight?

The Partridge Family: Two for the Show (1974) Season 4, Episode 14

Another desperate attempt to bring in new characters

[1/10 · 12 November 2022]

The fourth season of The Partridge Family is the show's weakest. Danny has entered the awkward teen years, David Cassidy seems checked out, and the songs are forgettable. So the show made multiple attempts to bring in new characters to bring some youth back into the show. This parade of losers included talentless little Ricky from next door who got to screech a number at the end of each episode, and Reuben's comedian-wannabe nephew who had the same haircut as Keith.

In this episode, the show introduces Andy Williams' real-life identical-twin nephews as the latest lambs to the slaughter. These two cannot act. At all. It's painful. Their little number at the end is passable at best. And fellas: you're way too old to be dressing alike. It's not cute at 14 - just creepy.

The Waltons: The Dust Bowl Cousins (1972) Season 1, Episode 12

The Dirtbag Cousins

[8/10 · 29 August 2022]

A fine first season entry, in which some poor cousins show up at the Waltons needing a place to stay for a while. Generous John and Olivia open their home to these shirttail relatives. Unfortunately, the husband and son are thieves and liars, and the wife/mother is their biggest enabler.

Livvie finally wakes up about two thirds of the way through the episode and realizes that these visitors are poisoning the loving family atmosphere she has worked so hard to build. Suspicious Grandma figured it out before then, but she was a complainer in general so John and Livvie didn't pay much attention to her. The freeloaders finally take off, much to the relief of everyone.

The acting from the adults in this episode is excellent as always, including the actors playing the cousins. The only false note is the faux upbeat closing narration, in which we find out that the cousins made a go of it in upstate New York. Unlikely. A more realistic closing narration would have revealed that the father wound up in jail, with his son soon following. But that wouldn't happen on a show as nice as The Waltons.

Laverne & Shirley: Mother Knows Worst (1976) Season 1, Episode 15

Fun episode, and a great showcase for Cindy Williams

[14 November 2021]

One of the Laverne & Shirley writers gave an interview a number of years back and said it was a joy to write for Cindy Williams because she could wring a laugh out of any line. This episode proves it. Cindy gets to display an array of emotions - all funny and all believable.

Pat Carroll was also wonderful as Lily "Barb" Feeney. Unfortunately, this was her only appearance on the show. It's hard to understand why she didn't become a recurring guest star.

A first-season gem.

The Brady Bunch: Goodbye, Alice, Hello (1972) Season 4, Episode 10

Carol is obnoxious

[8/10 · 18 October 2021]

Yes, the kids gave Alice the cold shoulder, causing her to quit. But what about Carol? The way she wags her finger in Alice's face, demanding that she squeal on the kids, is disrespectful. Alice should have said, "My job is to keep house, not keep tabs on your kids."

The resolution, where the kids retrieve Alice from the crappy diner job, is sweet. But nothing really got resolved in terms of the definition of Alice's job. I wish she had looked at Carol and redefined more appropriate parameters for her responsibilities.

Fantasy Island: Tattoo: the Love God/Magnolia Blossoms (1979) Season 3, Episode 3

Farfetched, even for Fantasy Island

[3/10 · 29 August 2021]

In the first fantasy, young women want to go back to the antebellum South, which surely wouldn't pass muster with the woke crowd these days. In the second fantasy, Roarke's assistant Tatoo wants to be a love god. Which is ridiculous, because even Roarke's powers must have their limits.

Tag (I) (2018)

Interesting idea, but too thin to sustain a movie

[4/10 · 31 December 2018]

This movie was based on an newspaper article about childhood friends continuing a game of tag into adulthood. Fun idea, but not nearly enough to sustain a 100 minute movie. So they try to stuff in a bunch of other stuff, including a romantic subplot, and cancer. That's right, cancer - a well known comedy killer.

It doesn't help that the cast is populated by second-tier TV actors. Ed Helms is not a movie star; stop trying to make him happen. Neither is Jake Johnson. I can't understand how Jeremy Renner made it - he's a very dull screen presence and not good looking at all (by movie standards).

The two saving graces of this movie: Jon Hamm and Isla Fisher. Hamm does his usual charming cad routine, but he does it so well. And Fisher is a riot, doing a lot with very little material. Why isn't she a bigger star?

Vega$: All Kinds of Love (1980) Season 2, Episode 14

Great episode, except...

[14 January 2018]

This is a well-done episode, except for the writers trying to maintain the status quo at the end. This would have been a good episode for Phyllis Davis' exit from the series. Could Tanna ever work with Bea again after she completely disbelieved him? In reality, their relationship would be irreparably broken. Ah well - that's an Aaron Spelling show for you.

Clueless (1996–1999)

Blanchard's the biggest problem

[31 July 2010]

The first season of the TV version of the hit movie reassembled a good chunk of the movie's cast, plus the movie's director Amy Heckerling as executive producer. So why was it such a pale imitation? Two words: Rachel Blanchard.

Blanchard took over as lead character Cher from Alicia Silverstone (who understandably had other things to do at the time). Though Blanchard was physically right for the role, her flat performance makes you realize how perfect Silverstone really was for the role, with her fizzy, lighthearted, charismatic performance. Blanchard, by contrast, was dull as dishwater, with no spunk or charisma or anything. She pulled the whole series down. They should have hired Christine Taylor (Marcia in "The Brady Bunch" movies) instead.

The second season got even worse. Moving to a smaller network (from ABC to UPN) necessitated budget cuts, so Heckerling was gone as well as movie vets Wallace Shawn and Twink Caplan. "Very special episodes" started to creep in as well. Ugh.

Skip this one and rent the movie again instead.

Return from Witch Mountain (1978)

Pale sequel; stick to the original

[3/10 · 18 February 2008]

"Escape to Witch Mountain" is not a perfect movie, but has a good plot, well-developed characters, and beautiful scenery. "Return from Witch Mountain", unfortunately, has none of those. In this contrived sequel, Tony and Tia are left to fend for themselves while on vacation in Los Angeles (all the better to save on the budget!), where they become mixed up with a mad scientist (Christopher Lee), his partner (Bette Davis), and various other Disney stock characters. What charms the original had are completely absent from this sequel, which seems to borrow every cliché from the scores of middling-to-bad Disney movies which littered the movie landscape in the 1970s.

Much of the dialog is cringe-worthy; you'll actually be embarrassed watching it. You're better off re-watching the original.

Snoopy Come Home (1972)

The best of the Peanuts flicks

[7/10 · 24 May 2006]

This melancholy entry in the Peanuts quadrilogy stands out among the four, simply because of the difference in tone from the other entries. "Race for Your Life" is much lighter in tone, while "Bon Voyage, Charlie Brown" is more shallow. "Snoopy, Come Home" is the most memorable because of its unusual depth, as well as the bittersweet themes that it touches on: friendship; loyalty; and partings of the way.

The plot, in a nutshell: Snoopy's former owner is sick, and calls him to her side. Snoopy makes a cross-country journey, and is then torn between staying with his former owner, who needs him, and returning to the place he considers home.

Though the animation is still fairly simple here, it's a notch above the usual Peanuts movies and specials - check out the beautiful backgrounds of the beach scenes, or the wonderful palettes displayed as Snoopy and Woodstock travel at sunset. Really striking, and different from what we usually see in the Peanuts stories.

The real mixed bag here is the music. This was the first Peanuts project that did not features a score by the brilliant Vince Guaraldi. Instead, the Sherman brothers of Disney fame provide the songs, several of which are sung by the characters (in contrast to Guaraldi's usual instrumentals). Some of these songs are quite good, like Fundamentalfriendependability, the song sung by a girl who captures Snoopy when he is en route. Others, like Snoopy and Woodstock's "Me and You" theme, are pure early 70s (think The Association) and unfortunately date the movie.

The voice work is generally good, unlike the more recent Peanuts entries where sounding somewhat like the original voices doesn't seem to be a prerequisite. Stephen Shea as Linus sounds almost exactly like older brother Chris, the original, definitive Linus who grew out of the role. The one weak voice is Charlie himself, whose voice is different enough from his predecessors to be distracting.

But these are nitpicks. The strength and depth of the story itself is more than enough to make up for the few weaknesses. For whatever reason, this is rerun less than the later two Peanuts movies, so seek it out on DVD - you won't be disappointed. And if you're softhearted, be sure to have a handkerchief handy.

Spencer's Mountain (1963)

Stick with "The Waltons"

[4/10 · 8 May 2006]

Based on the same source material that was used for the TV series "The Waltons", "Spencer's Mountain" is cornier, shallower, and quite a bit duller than its television counterpart. The basic setup is the same - a poor but proud man lives with his churchgoing wife, his elderly parents, and a multitude of children, including an intellectual eldest son who aspires to go to college. However, this movie takes place in the present day, though (1963 at the time), and the action, what little there is, is moved from Virginia to gorgeous Grand Teton National Park in Wyoming. Enjoy the scenery, because it's probably the best thing about the film.

Unlike the series, the characterizations are not nearly as well fleshed out. Other than the eldest son (here named Clay Boy instead of John Boy), none of the children are given much to do. The grandparents are ciphers as well. Also, it's difficult to make lovely Maureen O'Hara unappealing, but this movie somehow manages - she plays the clan's shrewish, nagging mother, who lavishes most of her attention on her "special" eldest son. Even worse is Henry Fonda as the patriarch, who is prone to spewing corny, down-home platitudes and creepily refers to his "babies".

Sure, "The Waltons" had its corny side as well, but the early seasons can be surprisingly gritty at times. "Spencer's Mountain" will just make your teeth ache. Skip it.

Killing Mr. Griffin (1997 TV Movie)

Adequate, but read the book instead

[8 January 2006]

Poor Lois Duncan. She's written many good-to-excellent thrillers aimed at the teen set, but their video adaptations almost never do them justice. "I Know What You Did Last Summer" was turned into a teen slasher flick; "Gallows Hill" was butchered into "I've Been Waiting for You", and "Don't Look Behind You" (one of Duncan's best, about a girl whose family enters Witness Relocation) was turned into a vehicle for "Dallas" has-been Patrick Duffy! Only "Summer of Fear", aka "Stranger in Our House", managed to survive intact (though you still have to put up with the dog/horse plot switch, as well as Linda Blair's scary perm).

The "Killing Mr. Griffin" movie, sad to say, is a middling effort, not at all worthy of the excellent source material. Most of the characters survive the transition to the screen, but are watered down and robbed of their distinctive traits. Mr. Griffin himself, a well-meaning guy who has trouble relating to kids in the book, is simply a jerk here. But worse is what happens to Mark Kinney. In the book, it is slowly and frighteningly revealed that Mark is actually a sociopath, whose history of violence and ability bend the group to his will is even more troubling than what happens to Mr. Griffin. But in the movie, Mark is just another troubled kid who is reacting to the pressure his parents have put on him to succeed. Too bad, because his original incarnation is much, much scarier.

If you haven't read the book, I highly recommend it, as well as the other books I've mentioned above. It would be a much better use of your time.

Recess: Taking the Fifth Grade (2003 Video)

Disappointing final chapter to the "Recess" series

[6/10 · 16 December 2003]

Production shut down on ABC's "Recess" series after it reached 65 episodes, as is mandated by producer Disney. But "Recess" proved to be so popular that an additional 13 episodes were commissioned. For some reason, though, ABC never broadcast the new episodes and they were instead edited into three direct-to-video movies. This entry, comprised of three episodes loosely joined together, finds the "Recess" gang finally being promoted to the fifth grade. But it seems they've lost some of their magic with the change in grades. First of all, there are distracting problems with character voices. Courtland Mead (Gus) and Jason Davis (Mikey) don't quite sound like they usually do, and Myles Jeffrey has replaced Andrew Lawrence as TJ (Lawrence's voice was sounding pretty deep in the final episodes of the series, so this change is understandable). Jeffrey is OK, although he hasn't captured TJ's spunk the same way that Lawrence did. The real problem, though, is that the stories just seem...tired. The first, in which TJ becomes a truant to protest changes at school, is simply boring. The last one, in which Spinelli decides she is too old for Halloween, seems like a rehash of previous stories. Only the middle entry, in which the kids join a secret club, comes close to the series' standards. Fans of the series will understandably want to catch up with their favorite characters, but this movie may make them realize why all good things must come to an end.

A Day for Thanks on Walton's Mountain (1982 TV Movie)

Best of the 80s Waltons reunions

[20 September 2001]

This is the best of the three "Waltons" TV movies that were filmed the year following the series' cancellation. This installment finds the family members dealing with various personal issues and starting to go their separate ways, much to the alarm of youngest sibling Elizabeth, who wants to see them all reunited to celebrate Thanksgiving.

Unlike some of the other "Waltons" movies, none of these personal problems are overly dramatic or come across as major crises. Instead, the script focuses on small issues, which is what the original series did so well. Among the subplots: Erin's new husband, Paul, is feeling smothered by her family; John-Boy is suffering writers' block; Jason ponders whether he should leave the mountain to pursue a music career.

If there are any problem with this movie, it's that a few cast members from the series are absent. Robert Wightman fills in as John-Boy, as he did in the last few years of the series, but it's tough to forget Richard Thomas, who created the role. Michael Learned is again absent as matriarch Olivia, who's still recuperating in an Arizona sanitarium from what must be the world's toughest case of TB. Learned is really missed here -- the show is never the same when she's not around.

Still, the theme of everyone coming together for Thanksgiving is a good one, and it's always fun to see the wonderful character actors playing the Walton's friends and neighbors, such as the Godseys, Yancy Tucker, and the Baldwin sisters. The final scene is pleasantly nostalgic and provides some nice closure, as we won't see the Walton family for another 11 years.

A Walton Wedding (1995 TV Movie)

If you liked the last reunion, you'll like this one

[18 September 2001]

The second of the three 1990s reunions for "The Waltons" TV series finds the Virginia mountain clan preparing for eldest son John-Boy's wedding in 1964. This time around, the writers wisely avoid trying to give subplots to each of the now-grown Walton children (most of these former child actors are now much less natural on-camera) and sticks to members of the family who can carry a story: John-Boy (Richard Thomas), John (Ralph Waite), and Olivia (Michael Learned). While the wedding preparations are going on, budding feminist Olivia enrolls in college and finds some prejudice against older students, while county commissioner John is caught in the middle of a minor scandal when he's forced to vote on a project in which the Walton lumber mill has an interest.

The script is less sappy than the last time-around, but there are also far fewer cameos from all the Waltons' friends and neighbors, which is a bit of a shame. Also, Richard Thomas wears a distracting pageboy hairdo which looks completely out of place for the early 60s, and Michael Learned seems to have lost some of the warmth that made Olivia such a wonderful character in the series (at one point, she refers to a fellow student as a "twit"!). The usually-wonderful Holland Taylor seems out of place on the mountain as the meddling aunt of John-Boy's bride-to-be.

But these are nitpicks. This is a solid effort that will entertain even casual fans of the original series.

Return to Mayberry (1986 TV Movie)

Fans of the series will be pleased

[18 September 2001]

This update of the old "Andy Griffith Show" is one of the better reunions of the many that popped up in the 1980s. No fewer than 16 actors who appeared in the original series are present, including Ron Howard, who by this time had gone on to much bigger and better things as the director of many hit feature films.

The plot finds former Mayberry sheriff Andy Taylor and his wife Helen returning to town for the birth of son Opie's first child. Perennial second-banana (and Andy's former deputy) Barney Fife is now running for sheriff, the job he always wanted. But it turns out that Andy wants his old job back, too. This unspoken conflict and the selfless efforts by Andy and Barney to resolve it are very touching.

There's a silly subplot about alleged sightings of a monster in the town lake that detracts from the proceedings. And some of the continuity from the sequel "Mayberry RFD" series isn't followed. But what you really want is to see how these old friends and neigbors are doing, and to feel some nostalgia. And on these two points, "Return to Mayberry" doesn't disappoint.

A Walton Thanksgiving Reunion (1993 TV Movie)

Decent TV-movie reunion

[17 September 2001]

This is one of the better TV-movie reunions, and better than most of the 80s "Walton" reunions that were done the year following the original series' cancellation. Unlike the earlier sequels, virtually the entire cast is present here, with a very well-preserved Richard Thomas returning as John-Boy, and Michael Learned back as family matriarch Olivia, who has recovered from the tuberculosis that kept her sidelined during the series' later years. Even a very frail-looking Grandma is present, even though her portrayer, Ellen Corby, suffered a massive stroke in the middle of the series' run.

The storyline, which deals with the Walton family's reaction to JFK's assasination, tends to be a little maudlin, and it's set about eight years too far in the future to jibe with the series' timeline. And a few minor characters are either missing, like Mary Ellen's husband, Jonesy, or altogether unmentioned, like Mary Ellen's son John Curtis. But what makes this fun is the presence of the original cast, plus cameos from all sorts of recurring characters from the series (something most reunions never bother to do). Keep your eyes peeled for appearances by storekeepers Ike and Corabeth, their daughter Aimee, neighbor Verdie Foster, town idiot Yancy Tucker, Aunt Rose, Elizabeth's boyfriend Drew, and, best of all, unwitting moonshiners Emily and Mamie Baldwin.

I Still Dream of Jeannie (1991 TV Movie)

Second sequel doesn't live up to the first

[17 September 2001]

Jeannie seems to have lost her newfound independence from the last TV sequel, as well as her reason for being with the absence of her master, who's off on an extended space mission (Larry Hagman is absent again). With the exception of the existence of Jeannie and Tony's son, none of the continuity developed for the earlier "15 Years Later" movie is followed.

The plot is contrived (Jeannie must find a temporary master while Tony is away), and there's little nostalgia value, as Jeannie and Roger are the only two characters from the original series present. If you want to see how things turned out for Jeannie and Tony after the original series ended, skip this one and seek out the earlier reunion, instead.

I Dream of Jeannie... Fifteen Years Later (1985 TV Movie)

Acceptable TV-movie reunion

[17 September 2001]

A seemingly ageless Barbara Eden reprises her role from the 60s sitcom as a genial genie married to her mortal astronaut master. Jeannie, who seems to have discovered women's lib since we last saw her, is anxiously awaiting husband Tony's retirement from the space program, so he can be at home more to help her raise their teenaged son, TJ. But Tony's agreement to undertake one more space mission threatens their marriage, and even his life.

The script tends toward corny, and Larry Hagman is missed as Tony Nelson (Wayne Rogers from "M*A*S*H" fills in). And the ending makes the whole thing smell like a failed pilot to revive the series. Still, there are some nice nostalgic moments with Eden, Bill Daily (as Tony's best friend, Roger), and Hayden Rorke as the always-suspicious Dr. Bellows.

Little House: The Last Farewell (1984 TV Movie)

For die-hard "Little House" fans only

[17 September 2001]

The main problem with this TV-movie finale of the "Little House on the Prairie" series is that it features the cast of the show's final season, by which time many of the better characters had been replaced by blander carbon-copies. So, you get the Carters instead of the Ingalls (with a few exceptions), Nancy Oleson instead of Nellie, Miss Plum instead of Miss Beadle, etc. The return of original series stars Michael Landon and Karen Grassle helps, but where's Mary, Adam, Albert, and Carrie? And, worst of all, Katherine MacGregor, who played town villianness Harriet Oleson, is nowhere to been seen. The Oleson family was the saving grace of "Little House", helping to cut through all the treacle, and the two most important Olesons, Harriet and Nellie, aren't in this movie. The story doesn't help, either. Couldn't they come up with a more uplifting plot than the destruction of the entire town?

Unless you're a die-hard fan, skip this one (as well as the other two sequel TV movies), and seek out the original pilot movie instead.