maddmatt420 Reviews

Hot Fuzz (2007)

Lukewarm Fuzz

[1/10 · 10 May 2007]

Let me preface this by saying that I LOVED Shaun of the Dead. It was brilliant. I was eagerly anticipating watching this movie, and therefore it probably came as a far far worse disappointment to me than to viewers who go in 'cold'.

That said, where was the actual humor in this? I honestly cannot understand these high ratings and positive reviews. I sat through this entire movie waiting for it to get funny, and literally there was not one single humorous line throughout the entire film. It was like watching a B cop movie, that's it. The plot wasn't funny, the characters weren't funny, the 'whodunit' results at the end weren't funny. This was just flat out terrible in all regards. Bland as oatmeal mush, seriously.

Some people are going to say I just don't 'get' British humor. No. I LOVE British humor pretty much universally. There just wasn't any of it in this movie.

Pledge This! (2006)

My brain tried to strangle me

[1/10 · 16 December 2006]

If I could give this movie a ratings less than 1 I would. This is coming from someone who LIKES fairly terrible movies. I watched Dorm Daze and thought it was mildly amusing. I watched Britney Spears in Crossroads for gods sake.

This movie made my brain try to jump down my throat and choke me just to save itself from the abject misery. Even the randomly placed T&A shots weren't enough to come CLOSE to making up for the terrible acting and plot. Having one of those girls in my actual LIVING ROOM naked would have made it even, and that's about it.

I would like to personally curse the names of the people who gave this movie a positive review, since I watched it based on those recommendations. I hope they have an extremity crushed by a load of bricks.

Oh, and if you didn't think it was possible to hate that worthless waste of space Paris Hilton any more. . . this movie will prove you wrong.

A Prairie Home Companion (2006)

Terrible and pointless

[1/10 · 19 September 2006]

This movie started nowhere and continued going there. Very slowly. Honestly this was basically like watching a variety show, interspersed with scenes from a totally non-fascinating side story.

This is coming from someone who loved the Prarie Home Companion radio show and book, and pretty much loves this kind of music. If you actually DON'T like this style of music and 'theater' this movie would definitely be well into the dig out your eyeballs with a fork category.

Really, if you're going to do a movie about death, then do a movie about death. Why waste 75% of the movie showing musical numbers that are in many cases completely irrelevant. It's like I could've cut out the entire 'plot' portion of this movie and watched it in about 20 minutes.