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Ghidorah
Reviews
The Killer Eye (1999)
Oh, the pain, the pain....
What to say, what to say... The phrase "avoid like the plague" immediately springs to mind. Now don't get me wrong -- I actually LIKE bad movies! "Plan Nine from Outer Space" is a true classic in my book. I've seen "Attack of the Eye Creatures" dozens of times. And movies like "Hell Comes to Frogtown", "Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death" and "A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell" are, to me, what film was created for in the first place. But this? Utter dreck, I'm afraid. Let me put it this way.... After the first 15 minutes or so I gave up trying to watch it and began fast-forwarding in an attempt to skip right to the obligatory "nude bimbo in the shower" scene. And even THAT was a disappointment!
Godzilla (1998)
Cool Giant Monster Movie, But Godzilla? I Think Not....
In true Hollywood tradition, Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin decided to take a pre-existing concept and do it bigger and hopefully -- better. Well, this movie is certainly bigger than any of the Japanese Godzilla movies in terms of budget and special effects. But is it better? Well, it all depends on your point of view, I suppose....
The good news is that this is a really fun and entertaining movie. Even knowing most of the plot ahead of time, it kept me on the edge of my seat. It was fast-paced, witty, exhilarating, and just plain fun! The special effects were awesome, and the CGI scenes were integrated well enough with the live footage so that it was easy to suspend disbelief and accept the thought of a gigantic monster rampaging in New York City. No, none of the actors are going to win Oscars for their performances, and the script probably won't be considered one of the classics of Western literature, but who really cares? This is a giant monster movie, and this movie certainly delivers a fantastic giant monster! Everything else is incidental. I mean, the more time they spend on character development, the less time they can spend showing the monster destroying New York, right? So, as giant monster movies go, this one is definitely a four star movie. Well, at least three and a half....
But is it truly a Godzilla movie, or is it simply a great monster movie?
Basically, this movie is a retelling of the original Godzilla movie, starting anew as if none of the previous Godzilla movies has ever taken place. This allows the film makers to play fast and loose with the character, without having to worry about monkeying around with the existing Godzilla continuity. Toho did something similar to this in 1984 when they "deleted" all the previous movies except for the first one. This is definitely an American movie, though -- Godzilla attacks New York, not Tokyo, and there is no connection to the atom bombing of Japan which served as the moral compass of the first movie. The important question, then, is whether this is really a "Godzilla" movie in anything other than name only.
Well, it is about a gigantic mutated reptile that attacks a major metropolitan area. And he does have these really funky spines running down his back. And, unlike movies like The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms and The Giant Gila Monster, this new monster does walk on two legs just like the traditional Godzilla. And this new monster does have a breath weapon of sorts, although instead of the traditional atomic plamsa breath we get a strong wind and a major case of halitosis. So, if Godzilla is simply a giant reptile that was created by radiation, has spines on his back, walks on two legs, breathes something destructive from his mouth and destroys cities, then yes, this probably is a Godzilla movie, in spite of the fact that this Godzilla also burrows underground and lays eggs.
Is this all Godzilla is, though? Personally, I think not. Although this movie preserves the basic concept of a giant monster attacking a city, that basic concept has been used in countless other movies. The original Godzilla was portrayed as an unstoppable force of nature, whereas this monster is simply a giant animal trying to get along in the world. The original Godzilla was an allegory for the horrors of nuclear war visited upon Japan, whereas this monster doesn't seem to be much of an allegory of anything. And, most important of all in my opinion, the original Godzilla had a powerful weapon that made him truly terrifying, his fearsome atomic plasma breath. That's what made him uniquely different from every other monster, and it was a clear, visual representation of his atomic-spawned origin. Monster, on the other hand, is able to blow hard enough to knock cars over, but it's just not the same. The film does pay homage to the traditional breath weapon by having vehicles ignite in mid-air, making it look briefly as if Godzilla is breathing fire, but that's as close as they come. Apparently, a fire-breathing 200-foot tall radioactive iguana would just be too hard to believe.... Unfortunately, Godzilla without his flame breath is like Batman without his batmobile, batcave and batarangs. Or perhaps a better analogy would be Superman without his ability to fly. Flying may not be "realistic", but it is an essential part of the character....
So, what's the final verdict? It's a fun movie. Go see it. Enjoy it. See it again. Check your higher reasoning functions at the door and just think about how lucky you are to have finally seen a giant monster movie done with such great special effects.
And then, when you're done, go pop Godzilla: King of the Monsters into the old VCR and remind yourself what Godzilla is really all about....
The Eye Creatures (1967)
"Plan 9" has nothing on this one!!!
This is, without a doubt, the funniest movie I have ever seen! Who cares if it was supposed to be a serious horror/sci-fi flick? The script, acting, cinematography, special effects and general production values are, quite literally, laughable. And hilariously so! One example... The climactic scenes all take place in the middle of the night, but instead of actually FILMING it at night they shot it at in the middle of the afternoon with a filter over the lens. Not only does everything cast a well defined shadow, you can even see the sun shining through the trees in a number of scenes! I know I'm weird, but to me THIS is the epitome of enjoyable cinema!