armstror Reviews

Darkness Falls (2003)

Entertaining flick that's far better than its reputation.

[6/10 · 30 October 2006]

"Darkness Falls" has been unjustly maligned by the majority of IMDb users. Certainly, it lacks the wit and style of "Jeepers Creepers" and "Dog Soldiers," probably the two best supernatural-creature-on-the-loose pictures of this decade (well, thus far). Still, it's a fast-paced mixture of familiar elements that opts for the unseen vs. visual gore. Even though the premise of a monster fearing light is old hat, it's fun to see the hero carrying around a bag of flashlights and loading/unloading batteries like shotgun shells. There's a nice old-fashioned feel to the proceedings, it's not another lame remake, and, best of all, the running time clocks in under 80 minutes if you subtract the lengthy credits.

The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996)

An implausible, but surprisingly entertaining action flick

[16 September 2001]

It's easy to find flaws to this fast-paced action yarn (e.g., Brian Cox plays a retired agent who schedules a rendenzvous on his phone, which is obviously tapped...like, shouldn't he know better?). But suspend your disbelief for two hours and it's hard to resist this tale of a female James Bond with a major identity crisis. Geena Davis and Samuel L. Jackson have nice chemistry and create likable characters from their underwritten parts. The villains are strictly cardboard and there's one climax too many. Still, director Renny Harlin (then Geena's husband) shows a flair for terrific set pieces (love the scene where Geena and Samuel are falling onto solid ice and she shoots a hole in it on the way down). All in all, it's hard to figure out why the public didn't make it a hit.

Blood from the Mummy's Tomb (1971)

There's no mummy, but there's blood, a tomb, & Valerie!

[14 September 2001]

This satisfying Hammer chiller falls somewhere between the studio's finest films (e.g., "Brides of Dracula") and its lame fillers (e.g., "Curse of the Mummy's Tomb"). The story moves slowly at times, but the brooding atmosphere works well. Andrew Keir, who was marvelous as the intrepid Professor Quatermass in Hammer's "Quatermass and the Pit," has too little to do (he spends a lot of the film unconscious). Fortunately, Valerie Leon, who plays his daughter, generates plenty of interest. This stunning beauty delivers an interesting performance and, well, she looks terrific in all those nightgowns. It's a shame Hammer didn't use her in other films.

Traffic (2000)

Well-intentioned, but overrated and artsy-fartsy

[3/10 · 15 January 2001]

The major flaw in this would-be modern epic is a lack of characters to root for. I think we're supposed to feel sympathetic for the drug czar and his drug-addicted daughter. She's a bored, rich girl from an unemotional home--so is that supposed to explain her dependence on drugs and make the audience feel sorry for her? Sorry, I didn't buy it. The performances are OK, but don't deserve the Oscar hype they're getting. The director, who shot the film himself, uses color imaginatively at first. But even that (along with occasional handheld camera) grows tiresome and draws attention away from the story. Overall, a major disappointment.

U-571 (2000)

A time-filler at best. Watch "Das Boot" again instead.

[3/10 · 16 May 2000]

"Das Boot" proved that submarines can provide the settings for claustrophobic action, intense crew interactions, and nail-biting suspense. Unfortunately, "U-571" fails miserably on all three counts. The culprits here are obvious plotting, mediocre acting, and pedestrian direction. The film has one legitimate surprise (no plot spoiler here), but it's way too easy to figure out the rest of the action before it happens. Harvey Keitel fares the best of the cast, but he's stuck with the stereotypical role of the war-hardened chief petty officer. Matthew McConaughey shows no screen presence as the lieutenant who has to take command. As for the direction, the film moved too slowly (especially at the beginning). Since I was always sure of the "U-571"'s outcome (unlike "Das Boot"), the suspense factor was the film's only lure and it was simply too weak.

The Ghost in the Invisible Bikini (1966)

The weakest entry in the "Beach Party" series.

[3/10 · 15 May 2000]

Instead of Frankie and Annette, we get Tommy Kirk and Deborah Walley. Although Tommy was fine in "Pajama Party" and Deborah made a respectable lead in "Ski Party", neither one of them gets much to work with here. Deborah's big scene has her strapped on a log moving toward a spinning blade--a scene ripped off from "Beach Blanket Bingo". The idea of a "Beach Party" flick in a haunted house probably sounded like fun. But the film plays like a series of unrelated sketches. Boris Karloff, Basil Rathbone, and the gorgeous Susan Hart are wasted. Even Harvey Lembeck seems to be going through the motions as Eric Von Zipper. Nancy Sinatra fans might enjoy seeing her sing "Geronimo" (a ho-hum tune) and trying to act. The film's highlight is probably Quinn O'Hara. She's pretty funny as Sinistra, Basil Rathbone's statuesque, but blind-without-her-glasses, daughter.

Pajama Party (1964)

The second best of the "Beach Party" movies.

[7/10 · 15 May 2000]

"Beach Blanket Bingo" reigns as the best of AIP's "Beach Party" series, but "Pajama Party" takes the runner-up spot. True, there's no Frankie, but Tommy Kirk does fine as a teenaged alien trying to understand the ways of Earthlings (the plot was obviously inspired by "Visit to a Small Planet"). Annette has one of her best songs with the hilarious "Stuffed Animals" number. The often under-used Susan Hart looks terrific, especially when her dancing causes a toy volcano to erupt. In short, "Pajama Party" is a very entertaining piece of nostalgia. It's a shame that Tommy Kirk and Susan Hart were both wasted in the later lame series entry "Ghost in the Invisible Bikini".

Gladiator (2000)

Pretty good, but this overrated historical epic lacks heart.

[5/10 · 9 May 2000]

"Gladiator" has a lot to commend it: Awesome fight scenes in the Coliseum, haunting images, and fine (albeit brief) supporting turns by Oliver Reed and Derek Jacobi. But it's ultimately a three-character movie (Maximus, Lucilla, and Commodfus)and none of those three characters are all that interesting. The ending should be devastating in terms of emotional content, but it just lacks the heart of earlier Roman epics like "Spartacus" and even "Quo Vadis". And, despite the lavish computer-generated effects, the film is sorely missing an epic scope. Contrast Commodus's arrival in Rome with Cleo's spectacular entrance in the '63 "Cleopatra". Maybe the latter film wasn't all that great either, but it captured the scale and pagentry that "Gladiator" misses.

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

A lame, irritating movie that is never scary.

[1/10 · 22 September 1999]

I can't remember the last time I saw a theatrical film as lame as "Blair Witch". Oooh...a mysterious pile of sticks....am I supposed to be scared? The fear of the unseen can be potent in a movie, as evidenced by the creepy forest scene in "Night of the Demon" (1958). But "Blair Witch" is strictly an amateur affair from start to finish. The characters were poorly developed and not the least appealing. I didn't care what happened to them. As for the hand-held camera, it was effective for maybe ten minutes, then its effect became irritating...very irritating. I will say this: The studio did a super job of marketing the film and generating a tremendous amount of hype.

Quatermass (1979)

See the 4-hour miniseries instead of the edited movie.

[7 September 1999]

I recently watched the complete four-hour version of Nigel Kneale's British miniseries "Quatermass." I had seen an edited movie version called "The Quatermass Conclusion" some years earlier. The verdict: The miniseries is superior. It expands on several subplots (of course) and offers richer characterizations. John Mills makes an excellent Quatermass--somewhat befuddled at the outset, but strong and clear of mind when the survival of the world is at stake. Granted, the production is not as polished as the movie version of "Quatermass and the Pit" (the music, in particular, sounds like it costs a couple of hundred bucks). But the ideas are intriguing and that darn nursery rhyme about Ringstone Round is still running around my brain. Kneale wrote a novelization of the miniseries that clarifies a few vague points.

Curse of the Demon (1957)

One of the best horror films ever made.

[9/10 · 14 January 1999]

Several books claim that the footage of the demon was inserted into "Night of the Demon" at the producer's insistence. Whether true or not, it's a good thing--because the demon is one of the most visually terrifying creatures in the history of cinema. And except for an awkward shot at the film's conclusion, the demon looks quite convincing. Still, he gets second billing to Niall MacGinnis' great performance as Karswell. My favorite scene: When Karswell explains to two non-believers the difference between white and black magic at a Halloween party he's thrown for the local kids. To make a point, he conjures up a stylish wind storm--which crashes the party and still fails to convince his intended audience. (Be sure to note the similarity between the kids' party here and the one in "The Birds"). All in all, "Night of the Demon" is a great chiller, marred only by Dana Andrews' routine turn as a skeptic who would put Dana Scully to shame.

The Fury (1978)

An underrated DePalma paranormal thriller.

[8/10 · 5 January 1999]

"The Fury" has gotten better with age and can now be viewed as one of DePalma's most satisfying thrillers. It consists of two stories which eventually overlap. The first story deals with a former government agent (Kirk Douglas) who searches for his son, who has been kidnapped by the feds who want to exploit his telekinetic powers. The second story revolves around a teenaged girl (Amy Irving) who discovers that she too has paranormal powers. Eventually, Douglas enlists her aid in finding his son. The film includes some unexpected humor and several breathtaking sequences, to include a stunning shot where Irving's character is surrounded by past images of Douglas' son (you gotta see it to believe it). The denouement is contrived, but effective and has been ripped by other films.