Where to begin?,,,,the film is meant to be about 6 friends who go missing in the woods, only they don't, they all die in a house, killed by an ironing board with a wolf's head glued to it and some David Bowie impersonators, that's how muddled this film is, it doesn't even keep to it's own synopsis. I should explain, one of the friends shoots an empty gorilla costume when they're out in the woods, all 6 of them mistake it for Bigfoot, (I know!!), and they decide to strap it to the roof of the car and take it home in case they get into trouble, (I know, I know!!). The gorilla suit then comes back to life, turns into the ironing board with the wolf's head glued to it, calls some of his pals who like to dress as David Bowie and they kill the hikers, who aren't hikers now because they're in a house, i think. One particularly harrowing scene has one of the hikers (housemates) hiding from the ironing board in the cupboard under the sink,,,, never thought i'd ever say that, the cupboard door is hanging open and the creature takes a full minute to find him!!. I love crap creatures, but a hairy ironing board that can't find a grown man in a kitchen cupboard is just taking the pi$s. As for all the David Bowies, answers on a postcard.
12 Reviews
Garbage House
knightox10 July 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The other reviewers who rated this horrible mess one star were exactly right to do so. I'm pretty sure they would have given it negative ones if they could have. I'd give it a minus-5. Everything about this "production" is just WRONG!!! Terrible actors, terrible plot, terrible filming, terrible directing and probably a terrible budget around two hundred dollars. It is an insult to watch for a person with a functioning brain. Anyone involved with making this idiocy should be ASHAMED and definitely NOT paid. And btw there are no wolves in this as the poster falsely advertises.
The One Star Reviews Are Spot On
tmccull5212 July 2020
Warning: Spoilers
Note to aspiring indie horror film makers': if you want to center your story around a group of long-time friends heading out to do this or that, instruct the members of your cast to act like they actually like one another while in character.
This is another one of those "found footage" horror films. Why is it that the group "documentation" in almost every single one of these movies is an obnoxious, annoying, arrogant, classless, clueless twit? This is, of course, the case in this movie. The friend behind the camera in this movie is Joseph Hiller, and he is totally and completely unlikeable, so unlikeable that you have to wonder why anyone else in the movie would want to have anything to do with him. Joseph tapes a KICK ME sign to the back of another member of our merry band, and then he follows his victm around and repeatedly kicks him in the ass. When he is told to stop, he protests and complains, and he just can't understand why everyone else in the group doesn't find this to be absolutely hilarious. It's comedy gold, according to Joseph!
After arriving at their destination, another member of the group, John, shoots a large, hairy creature and kills it. Is it Bigfoot? The group debates this. Yes, it is. No, it isn't. Yes, it is. No, it isn't. Regardless, they take the remains with them, wrapped in plastic. The problem is, the creature isn't dead. The group goes to check on the body, but it's gone. They go into the house to discuss what might have happened to the corpse when it stacks them. Two members of the group are killed in the initial attack, and the rest flee. One tries to call the police, but he is reprimanded that 911 is for emergency use only. So, the police aren't coming.
As the film goes on, it appears that the creature that was shot and killed was recovered by other creatures of the same kind. John tells the remaining members of the group about supernatural creatures of Native American folk lore and legend. Another member of the remaining group makes a comment about one of the two that were killed. This is Allan, who had the KICK ME sign taped to his back. Allan says something about Rebecca, who was John's girlfriend, until she was killed. John goes berserk and attacks Allan, and the others manage the pull John away.
Alan. Alan Alan Alan Alan. Alan is very arguably the most despicable cretin in the history of indie horror. Actually, no one in this movie is likeable, but Alan is so utterly lacking in any redeeming qualities that you wonder why anyone would have anything to do with him at all. Joseph, the video documentation, particularly detests Alan, as he sees Alan as a rival for another member of the group, Donna. Joseph has romantic designs upon Donna, you see.
The "found footage" is interspersed with flashbacks that are supposed to fill in the individual back stories, and explain the relationships between the characters. The flashbacks don't help the movie, as they only reinforce the contemptability of each member of the group. As the film goes on, the remaining members of the group get picked off one by one. I cheered as each one was killed.
Someone else left a seven star review for this movie, and decried those leaving one star reviews as "Hollywood lackeys" with their own agendas. This has to be coming from someone connected directly with this movie. When the creatures are revealed, they are completely and uttetly laughable, even for low budget standards. We have giant creatures that look like a cross between a wolf and a gorilla, and others who look like zombies running around in their underwear. It really is that bad. This is truly and genuinely a waste of resources and time. It is an utter piece of trash.
This is another one of those "found footage" horror films. Why is it that the group "documentation" in almost every single one of these movies is an obnoxious, annoying, arrogant, classless, clueless twit? This is, of course, the case in this movie. The friend behind the camera in this movie is Joseph Hiller, and he is totally and completely unlikeable, so unlikeable that you have to wonder why anyone else in the movie would want to have anything to do with him. Joseph tapes a KICK ME sign to the back of another member of our merry band, and then he follows his victm around and repeatedly kicks him in the ass. When he is told to stop, he protests and complains, and he just can't understand why everyone else in the group doesn't find this to be absolutely hilarious. It's comedy gold, according to Joseph!
After arriving at their destination, another member of the group, John, shoots a large, hairy creature and kills it. Is it Bigfoot? The group debates this. Yes, it is. No, it isn't. Yes, it is. No, it isn't. Regardless, they take the remains with them, wrapped in plastic. The problem is, the creature isn't dead. The group goes to check on the body, but it's gone. They go into the house to discuss what might have happened to the corpse when it stacks them. Two members of the group are killed in the initial attack, and the rest flee. One tries to call the police, but he is reprimanded that 911 is for emergency use only. So, the police aren't coming.
As the film goes on, it appears that the creature that was shot and killed was recovered by other creatures of the same kind. John tells the remaining members of the group about supernatural creatures of Native American folk lore and legend. Another member of the remaining group makes a comment about one of the two that were killed. This is Allan, who had the KICK ME sign taped to his back. Allan says something about Rebecca, who was John's girlfriend, until she was killed. John goes berserk and attacks Allan, and the others manage the pull John away.
Alan. Alan Alan Alan Alan. Alan is very arguably the most despicable cretin in the history of indie horror. Actually, no one in this movie is likeable, but Alan is so utterly lacking in any redeeming qualities that you wonder why anyone would have anything to do with him at all. Joseph, the video documentation, particularly detests Alan, as he sees Alan as a rival for another member of the group, Donna. Joseph has romantic designs upon Donna, you see.
The "found footage" is interspersed with flashbacks that are supposed to fill in the individual back stories, and explain the relationships between the characters. The flashbacks don't help the movie, as they only reinforce the contemptability of each member of the group. As the film goes on, the remaining members of the group get picked off one by one. I cheered as each one was killed.
Someone else left a seven star review for this movie, and decried those leaving one star reviews as "Hollywood lackeys" with their own agendas. This has to be coming from someone connected directly with this movie. When the creatures are revealed, they are completely and uttetly laughable, even for low budget standards. We have giant creatures that look like a cross between a wolf and a gorilla, and others who look like zombies running around in their underwear. It really is that bad. This is truly and genuinely a waste of resources and time. It is an utter piece of trash.
Abysmal "acting"
thedarkestshadow-3278510 August 2020
I didn't think the acting was THAT bad until the....whatever it was attacked. The guy screaming ( camera operator) was.... there's not a word string enough to describe how bad his acting is. Then the guy that calls 911 and the 911 operator are even worse. The worst movie I'd ever seen was Terror Toons but this just topped it.wow.....just wow. They should be ashamed to show their faces in public.
A Chipmunk
nogodnomasters14 August 2017
Warning: Spoilers
70 minute found footage film, I wanted to pull at 70 seconds with the boring monologue. A group of young adults go up to Hartland, NY to a cabin, only to be bothered by a creature for their bad acting and filming. Found footage was done poorly for realism...I suppose. It included the shake cam, jerk cam, floor cam, head cut off cam, butt cam, green cam, foot cam, etc. The writers thought it would be clever to create character with a "kick me" sign. The special wolf effects were a set back from the Lon Chaney Jr. days. The end included black and white photos "in memory of" type of stuff, most likely a tribute to death of their acting careers. Please note, if you are are going to show a film as if it is found footage, it really needs to be chronological without flashbacks.
At no time does a wolf emerge from a human as on the DVD cover art.
Guide: No sex or nudity. Didn't catch any F-words, although admit I used the FF film, depriving myself of a hacker punch on my card.
At no time does a wolf emerge from a human as on the DVD cover art.
Guide: No sex or nudity. Didn't catch any F-words, although admit I used the FF film, depriving myself of a hacker punch on my card.
Abhorent in every possible way. Everyone involved should be embarrassed.
manuelasaez3 March 2017
A poor budget is no excuse for unleashing a turd onto the cinematic world, yet this...thing (I refuse to call it a movie) was so unbelievably bad, it barely deserves a full review. But if writing one saves anyone else the agony of sitting through this hot garbage, I will suffer the ordeal of writing it. First of all, the cast. Untalented, annoying, and lacking any chemistry, it was like watching 5 mean kids from High School attempting to have anything in common. The main character was insufferable, and the supporting cast was just as bad, if not worse. I hated everyone from the onset, and I was actually rooting for them to die in the most horrific ways possible. The movie itself doesn't take long to get going, but when it does, you would have wished it didn't. There are crappy special effects make-up, and then there is this. I...just have no words at how incredibly offensive everything looked. Like watching a 4th grade production of Underworld. Here is a suggestion; nobody involved in this soiled diaper has any idea what true artistry is. This thing is what is commonly referred to as a "cash-grab". They shoot a cheap thing as a found-footage to save as much money as possible, not caring that their names are attached to this festival of regret. I would be embarrassed, ashamed and offended if my name were ever attached to something this horrifically bad. A complete and utter failure form beginning to end, this thing does not deserve oe iota of your time. Please, PLEASE avoid this. I beg of you. These people do not deserve to have the funds to ever make another film again.
Another Awful Found Footage "Movie"
craigfisher-0098011 June 2017
At some point someone will figure out found footage films suck. This one has all the usual problems. You can't see anything most of the time thanks to shaky cam. You watch a lot of people's feet. This film has the added problem of shooting a lot in night vision mode. Plus they use the picture in picture edit at times so it is even harder to see. You get the tearful Blair Witch monologue into the camera because you I guess have to. This film isn't a so good it is bad type film. It is awful and basically unwatchable.
Was not disappointed
carpenterkaiden23 March 2023
Warning: Spoilers
We looked through a random pile of movies, looked up the worst overall rating, can honestly say I expected garbage, but this is steaming hot garbage. The acting was spot on, the film, sfx, audio, everything was exactly what was expected. We knew it was gonna be awful, can confirm this is awful. Between the wolves wearing jeans, to the fake blood flowing out of some guys mouth, the horribly placed cut scenes/flashbacks, the awful portrayal of characters and their position in the friend group, the hair, oh the hair was fabulous, everything about this movie was absolutely incredible. Incredibly cringy. This movie was awful, so bad I couldn't even find stuff to laugh at most of the time, but I will definitely be recommending it to friends to waste their time.
Spend a night in the Wolf House.
eahoulie-954617 November 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Look at all these Hollywood lackeys trashing a decent indie film. Thanks to your hard work we're that one step closer to another Blumhouse movie. Wolf House is a very well crafted found footage film. Some elements we've seen before and some add a bit of spice. Essentially, a Native American legend is none too happy with being shot and hoisted atop some redneck's suv. But it decides to make the most of it by tormenting and torturing said redneck and friends. The film is edited in such a way that you might actually like the characters as you're presented with shocks of monster intercut with a camping trip meant to repair friendships. So, why a seven? Well, there's quite a few cliche scenes including the "If anyone finds this...sorry mom" speech. This is incredibly low budget, which, if you're used to your found footage having remarkably fabulous lighting and well made up actors (for supposedly being completely organic), this might turn you off. There's also the not having everything explained completely vs. just enjoying all the "what the hell"s for the fun of it factor. It also seems a bit strained just to make it feature-length. It's a matter of taste as the found footage genre has many different flavors. It certainly doesn't deserve a one-star rating, that's a bit overdramatic. It's no where near a ten but one star should be reserved for not very well organized slides of someone's summer vacation.
Actually Watchable
melk081523 September 2020
BEST MOVIE
ironmanhipster23 March 2023
Best movie I've ever seen. Best costumes. Best makeup. Best acting I've ever witnessed. Will recommend. Honestly it was like a toddler took your phone and was recording anything and everything. But I'm not really complaining. I feel bad for the poor werewolf, he'll be needing a chiropractor for the rest of his life.
One thing it has in common with another very popular movie is all the mouth breathing. Kristen Stewart taught them everything they needed to know. Makes me want to take a class from her as well.
Directors and producers should take note and never make a monstrosity like this ever again.
One thing it has in common with another very popular movie is all the mouth breathing. Kristen Stewart taught them everything they needed to know. Makes me want to take a class from her as well.
Directors and producers should take note and never make a monstrosity like this ever again.
I hated this
alisatperez23 March 2023
So much of the movie was boring and the characters were annoying and the filming was A W F U L. Like it was just mostly basically not enjoyable. Once people started dying it was really funny. It's just so silly. The whole house is ridiculous and the werewolf looks like a reject puppet from the dark crystal and then suddenly there were like cavemen and cult zombies????? The ACTING, like bruh. It's just breathing heavily and over acting and stupid repetitive arguments that you can't even follow. Anyway it just drags out the ending and it's all super cheesy and you'll laugh only near the ending. I hated this movie. I would recommend it to a friend.
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