My Husband Hired a Hitman (2024) Poster

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4/10
The title is not a lie
BandSAboutMovies9 May 2024
Warning: Spoilers
Daniela (Tamara Almeida) and her husband Jaime (Jason Diaz) have seen better days. He was once a star athlete but got hurt, so now all he does is play video games and get more depressed while his wife cooks, cleans and makes all the money. He resents her, because she reminds him of the great past that he once had. She wants out so that she can have a future.

While talking with his friend Miguel (Milton Torres Lara), the conversation gets around to what Jaime should do now that it looks like he's heading for a divorce. His wife has a $500,000 life insurance policy, but when Miguel suggests they kill her, Jaime reminds him how much he loves his wife.

However, one of her fellow nurses and her best friend Rosie (Erica Deutschman) has a crush on Jaime and takes a photo of Dani consoling a cop named Noah (Brett Geddes)who saved her from a homeless man who was attacking people inside the hospital. It isn't even a romance yet, but it's already upset Dr. Will (Connor McMahon), who has an infatuation with Dani, and when Miguel sees the photo, he decides that yes, his wife must die.

Miguel decides to pull the job but he gets nervous and struggles with Dani, whose hand is on the gun when it goes off. She has no idea what to do, so she hides the body and calls Noah instead of 911. He reacts so much unlike how she expected, telling her that she's going to hurt his career. That said, he does help her hide out until she figures out what to do next. As she waits in a trailer, she's using her house's cameras to watch what Jaime is doing.

Antonio (David Chinchilla), Miguel's brother, wants revenge a lot more than Jaime. He decides that he's going to be the one to kill Dani and get the money. Noah, who falls for women in trouble, wants to help her. Jaime has no idea what he wants. Dani, however, is the kind of heroine who will do whatever she has to do to get away from all of these men and the various things they need from her.

Directed by Lisa Soper (the production designer on Peacemaker, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina and The Blackcoat's Daughter) and written by Huelah Lander (Twisted Neighbor), this film has a wild color palette that feels like people live inside a Mario Bava film, as well as some great character work. Rosie is one of the most horrible, self-centered and awesome villains I've seen in a movie in some time. And Dani ends up being stronger than anyone else, making unexpected decisions and pulling herself out of the mess her life has become.
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1/10
The more we watched.....
fsudad-9658316 May 2024
The lower the rating.

It was painful to watch. Like fingernails on a chalkboard. The plot went haywire a third of the way in. If you paid really close attention, you would see mistake after mistake. And what's sad is that there was a pretty good premise at the beginning of the movie.

To be perfectly honest, we watched the movie just to see how it ended. Every so often you'll see that one movie that makes you think "Why did I spend the time to watch this thing"? This was one of those times.

The only redeeming part of this movie was one brother's love for the other. And even then it didn't help.

It happens, I guess.
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