Photos
Quotes
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Malory Archer : [arguing over the phone with Len Trexler] You wanna play me hard?
Sterling Archer : Phrasing.
Malory Archer : Well, then, you better nut up!
Sterling Archer : Phrasing!
Malory Archer : Because I've swallowed just about all I'm going to take from you!
Sterling Archer : Hey! Phrasing!
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Agent Lana Kane : Where's the hobbit guy?
Sterling Archer : A frickin' hobbit works here now? Jesus, Lana, they're called little people, not hobbits.
Agent Lana Kane : No, he's not *a* hobbit. He's a hobbit *enthusiast*.
Sterling Archer : [wierded out] Oh.
Agent Lana Kane : Yeah, I know, but he knows how to work all the computers and satellites and shit.
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[last lines]
Sterling Archer : No! Not Deliverance.
[chuckles]
Sterling Archer : In Gator.
Agent Lana Kane : [disgusted] Oh.
Sterling Archer : Right.
[pause]
Sterling Archer : How can you not see that?
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[first lines]
Sterling Archer : Shh!
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Sterling Archer : What's with all the bottles? It's like a trailer park Easter.
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Lana Kane : ...and so basically, we are totally unprepared for this mission.
Sterling Archer : Unless it involves night shoveling.
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Malory Archer : This is the last time you make me out a fool, Len Trexler. You wanna play me hard?
Sterling Archer : Phrasing.
Len Trexler : You know I do.
Malory Archer : Well then you'd better nut up.
Sterling Archer : Phrasing.
Malory Archer : Because I've swallowed just about as much as I can take from you!
Sterling Archer : Hey! Phrasing!
Malory Archer : And we'll see who's smirking when ISIS steals that diamond for real!
Len Trexler : Oh, you're a naughty girl.
Malory Archer : Right, then, commence Operation Rub Len Trexler's Big Fat Nose in it.
Sterling Archer : Yeah. Sounds like you already have.
Agent Lana Kane : Wait. You want us to break back into the palace which now has the insane amount of security we recommended, plus god knows how many ODIN guys?
Malory Archer : Yes, so take more of that poison.
Agent Lana Kane : And on top of that suck salad, you want to sprinkle on the bacon bits of "Oh, hey, let's tell them we're coming"?
Malory Archer : Well?
Agent Lana Kane : Well, there's this new thing called the element of surprise?
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Malory Archer : I don't care if you're captain...
[pause]
Sterling Archer : Crunch! No wait, Beefheart.
Sterling Archer : Claudio, we had a deal!
Sterling Archer : Wait, Kangaroo.
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Sterling Archer : Frickin' ODIN. I can't believe this.
Lana Kane : How many are there?
Sterling Archer : About a bajillion.
Lana Kane : Damn it!
Sterling Archer : Bajillion gay little copycats.
Lana Kane : What?
Sterling Archer : I didn't invent the turtleneck, Lana, but I was the first to recognize its potential as a tactical garment! The tactical turtleneck, Lana.
Lana Kane : Archer.
Sterling Archer : The tactleneck!