1951's "Behave Yourself!" is that rare comedy lacking in anything remotely humorous, spoofing the gangster genre with its huge array of guest stars essentially reduced to cameo roles, most of whom join the heavenly choir by picture's end. The cause of all the mayhem is an overly friendly Welsh terrier named Archie, liaison for a contraband smuggling ring, who latches on to small time accountant William Calhoun Denny (Farley Granger), using the pooch as a last minute substitution for a wedding anniversary gift that delights wife Kate (Shelley Winters), if not her typically suspicious mother (Margalo Gillmore). The crooks wait for their loot to change hands as every address listing a lost dog winds up with another batch of corpses to baffle the cops, until the last few that remain all gather at the Denny residence for a final shootout. The blame for this misfire lies squarely with author George Beck, supposedly written as a Damon Runyon knockoff in four days as his only feature film as director, less so for mismatched stars Granger (substituting for Cary Grant) and Winters, whose off screen friendship doesn't translate into on screen sparks. Easily lost among the numerous supporting villains is Lon Chaney as Pinky, the somewhat dimwitted racketeer responsible for most of the bodies lying about, and an easy target for Denny's false escape route (he would also be wasted in another alleged comedy, "Pardners," starring Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis).
Review of Behave Yourself!
