Rhinestone (1984)
2/10
Don't Join The Bandwagon
1 October 2023
I'm a fan of Sylvester Stallone, but the facts are the facts. After his stardom blew up because of Rocky he choose to appear in some really bad movies in the 80's & 90's. Even wrote & directed select pieces. 'Rhinestone' belongs to this category of "what was he thinking" level of ego. Good news is whenever things looked grim he had a Rocky or Rambo sequel to fall back upon.

The story of Jake (Dolly Parton) trying to win a bet to get out from her singing contract at a NYC country music nightclub is hokum. She tells the club manager she can make ANYONE into a country sensation. Of course her boss gets to choose the dude and he picks loud mouth, tough guy cabbie Nick Martinelli (Stallone).

Can I mention if she loses the bet not only does she have to sign a contract extension, but she has to sleep with her boss? Ugh. The rest is drilling Nick about how to walk, talk, look, breathe country on the way to the singing make-or-break predictable finale.

I went into 'Rhinestone' for some unintentional laughs and I certainly got a few. The production history, Sly's bouts of ego and 'I know better' are more fun than the actual title. His maneuver of revisionist history and not taking any responsibility for his part in this mess is a hoot. I don't expect hardcore fans of his to acknowledge this given the amount of love this title is getting, but there's a reason why this film flopped and is generally considered a trainwreck.
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