Buckle up, we're on an express hoverboard to Space Fury. I got a good feeling about this one tonight, like we're in for something special.
If they added an extra R to the title of this then it would be Space Furry. Then it'd be about Grizzlore or Chewbacca, maybe even Ewoks? (Or would it be Sparse Furry?) Awesome, it starts off with a 3D Langolier in Atari format coming right at you.
Space Fury is gonna blow "Aliens" and "Star Wars" right out of the water, I mean stratosphere. The cast in this is awesome - it stars Michael Pare. Remember him from um, uh, that other movie he was in? Yer, that one.
So we're at the nebulous of some chocolate rice crispy breakfast cereal galaxy where we find Betty Boop in some Levithan air pressure explorer with a bunch of Russians speaking another language other than human. Provide some subtitles, please.
Ground control consists of a mixed bunch of nimrods, who sit around with stupid worried looks on their faces, as some popcorn space shuttle crash lands into a um, third dimensional plasma thingy from "Stargate?" (I'm really struggling here. Its like I'm drowning in space treacle watching this.) For some reason we jump to Moscow where The Red Ripper has slain another victim?
And now what appears to be a commercial for Orbit Cola has reared its ugly head in this horrendous movie. Isn't the whole point of watching a DVD to eliminate commercials? This space cola promotion has jack squat to do with anything.
It then turns into a war movie in chechnya with tanks and militia fighting internal domestic affairs?
To enhance the movie's boredom, Betty Boop then goes to bed with Babu Bhatt from "Seinfeld." It's the equivalent of Princess Leia sleeping with The Ranchor Keeper.
The me in year 7 probably would have dug this crap? The me of 2021 is sitting here like a poster boy for euthanasia.
Wow, two spacemen go out to patch the Stargate up with the soda can and decide to make out. Their love making is not compatible to space protocol and violates galaxy laws under section 8 so one is eliminated while the other vies for Betty Boops affection with a fist fight as Boop arbitrates the masculinity and can't decide between the two warring factions.
In the end some big orange rind falls to Earth, two dipso's cut it fine to escape from Ray Liota's maniacal Turbulence and ground control orders pizza and super-strength laxatives to alleviate their constipation.
This movie's a galactic space movement from the bowels of a whole planet's waste disposal.
Space Fury is guilty on all counts! I'll give it 1/10 only because it's better than the worst movie in the world - "After Last Season." It's its only alibi.
The entire DNA makeup of this movie came from the urethral meatus of every space creature from Battlestar Galactica.
Good Lord.
If they added an extra R to the title of this then it would be Space Furry. Then it'd be about Grizzlore or Chewbacca, maybe even Ewoks? (Or would it be Sparse Furry?) Awesome, it starts off with a 3D Langolier in Atari format coming right at you.
Space Fury is gonna blow "Aliens" and "Star Wars" right out of the water, I mean stratosphere. The cast in this is awesome - it stars Michael Pare. Remember him from um, uh, that other movie he was in? Yer, that one.
So we're at the nebulous of some chocolate rice crispy breakfast cereal galaxy where we find Betty Boop in some Levithan air pressure explorer with a bunch of Russians speaking another language other than human. Provide some subtitles, please.
Ground control consists of a mixed bunch of nimrods, who sit around with stupid worried looks on their faces, as some popcorn space shuttle crash lands into a um, third dimensional plasma thingy from "Stargate?" (I'm really struggling here. Its like I'm drowning in space treacle watching this.) For some reason we jump to Moscow where The Red Ripper has slain another victim?
And now what appears to be a commercial for Orbit Cola has reared its ugly head in this horrendous movie. Isn't the whole point of watching a DVD to eliminate commercials? This space cola promotion has jack squat to do with anything.
It then turns into a war movie in chechnya with tanks and militia fighting internal domestic affairs?
To enhance the movie's boredom, Betty Boop then goes to bed with Babu Bhatt from "Seinfeld." It's the equivalent of Princess Leia sleeping with The Ranchor Keeper.
The me in year 7 probably would have dug this crap? The me of 2021 is sitting here like a poster boy for euthanasia.
Wow, two spacemen go out to patch the Stargate up with the soda can and decide to make out. Their love making is not compatible to space protocol and violates galaxy laws under section 8 so one is eliminated while the other vies for Betty Boops affection with a fist fight as Boop arbitrates the masculinity and can't decide between the two warring factions.
In the end some big orange rind falls to Earth, two dipso's cut it fine to escape from Ray Liota's maniacal Turbulence and ground control orders pizza and super-strength laxatives to alleviate their constipation.
This movie's a galactic space movement from the bowels of a whole planet's waste disposal.
Space Fury is guilty on all counts! I'll give it 1/10 only because it's better than the worst movie in the world - "After Last Season." It's its only alibi.
The entire DNA makeup of this movie came from the urethral meatus of every space creature from Battlestar Galactica.
Good Lord.