1/10
I Don't know where to start
3 September 2020
Warning: Spoilers
There's a podcast I listen to where guests are asked the worst film they've ever seen. Well I've got my new answer. This is, without doubt, that movie.

I don't know where to start with this movie, but the acting is as good a place as any. It's woeful. The actors look like they're doing a read through, and do not believe a single thing they are saying. I've never heard of the 'leads', which is fine, as just because you haven't heard of them doesn't mean they can't act. But this lot can't. And as for the more established cast, they are equally as bad. Caroline Munro's turn as the cafe owner is cringeworthy. But not as cringeworthy as the 5 minute recipe for Welsh rarebit she provides us with. I'm deadly serious.

As bad as the acting is, the writing is worse. To say it is clunky is an understatement. There is exposition everywhere and I actually felt for the actors having to spew it. There's one point where the scientists, scientists remember, scream "I don't doubt you both saw apparitions" to people who've been spooked. They weren't there. They're scientists, they should question everything.

There is a lot of homage (sorry rip off) of other movies. 'Get out' written on a mirror - Amityville. The cafe scene - American Werewolf in London. (All we were missing was 'Don't stray from the path'). And the blatant "homage" to The Shining at the end (the "photograph"). Shame on you.

And how is it shot? Badly. The director has a preoccupation with long, lingering shots of the building. It's architecture p0rn. The trouble is, it's the same shot over and over again. An example being the stone staircase with the rope handrail. It is used around 6 times. The same shot. The nadir though is the scene in the main actress' home. (Forget about the UK plug sockets when we're supposed to be in New York). The director spends around 2 minutes on the actress at a microwave. Heaven knows why. And then there's the point later in the film where the earth shakes and the special effects are akin to 1970s Doctor Who where the actors had to throw themselves around the room. They literally have to act as if they're being thrown around the room.

Then there is the editing. At one point, someone bursts into a room. The main actor then has to act surprised. Unfortunately for him, the editor left around 5 seconds between the person bursting in and the actor showing surprise. It's just odd. We then go from one extreme to another. Someone gets snatched and dragged out of a room. The main actor stops someone going after them by shouting "Leave it they've gone" when the editing suggests the victim is literally the other side of the doorway.

To summarise - it's woeful. You can make an affecting horror with little money. The recent Zoom-Seance movie "Host' showed that. This director of The Haunting of Margam Castle needs to watch that and weep.
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