Jason's machete, Freddy's glove, Michael's butcher knife, Leatherface's chainsaw...why not a killer with a javelin? They're so practical!
This movie is so dead-serious and yet feels like a parody. A soft-core porn parody. And it's pretty hilarious, though I seriously doubt anyone involved meant it to be that way.
My favorite example of "comedy" is two long shots in two separate locker rooms. The males are running around in whitey-tighties, including showering in them and then the film ventures into the female locker room where all the girls are completely nude, front, back and in almost every shot. Sure, I know I'm not the demographic for this film, but with careful editing, you could've given the illusion of the males naked without showing anything. It was just excuse #91 of showing fully naked chicks.
I digress, I just finished this and the ending had the obligatory killer explaining his/her motives to the final girl...and I still don't know why the killer did all that killing. But, at least it's hilarious whenever the killer's onscreen: we just see this shadow of the killer with the javelin posed to be thrown at the victims and some crazy score. It's fantastic cheese.
But...not as humorous as when they show the javelin travel through the air at the students. I imagine those scenes must be seen by someone high. Most...laughs...ever.
Basically, there's an Olympic training academy run by four red herrings and students are getting, ah-hem, picked off one at a time. Oh, and they're being legally prescribed steroids because 1980s. Not sure if that's relevant because I still don't know the motives of JK, or Javelin Killer.
And no, it's seriously not worth my time to go back and rewatch the ending. I really don't care that much. The movie was extremely hard to watch anyways: the budget was so low, they couldn't afford the electricity to keep the lights on for more than half the film.
I award this movie one extra star for the unintentional comedy and I could see the actors, despite their terrible portrayals and dialogue, really trying. They did put their heart into it. But, more so for the downright, laugh-out-loud scenes.
***
Final thoughts: I don't recall how exactly I learned of this movie - it was just a few days ago I first ever heard of this 1984 slasher film. But, what made me want to see it was the back cover of the VHS which read: "...Far too many people at the academy have motives. Dr. Jordan with his illegal use of drugs in training. Overly-demanding Coach Webber. Lesbian Coach Drew. Therapist Diane Paine, a maternal figure who takes her work into the bedroom..."
Wait. Hold up, 1984. You are seriously lumping in a lesbian into that suspect bunch? And with nothing attached, just "Lesbian Coach Drew"? It's stated that one of the actresses who played a lesbian character took a filming break along with everyone else and came back to the shoot changed into a Born Again Christian and refused to kiss another woman, even for the sake of acting. Huh. Maybe we should've changed "Lesbian..." to "A Born Again Christian student" as a suspect. To me, that's just as offensive.
This movie is so dead-serious and yet feels like a parody. A soft-core porn parody. And it's pretty hilarious, though I seriously doubt anyone involved meant it to be that way.
My favorite example of "comedy" is two long shots in two separate locker rooms. The males are running around in whitey-tighties, including showering in them and then the film ventures into the female locker room where all the girls are completely nude, front, back and in almost every shot. Sure, I know I'm not the demographic for this film, but with careful editing, you could've given the illusion of the males naked without showing anything. It was just excuse #91 of showing fully naked chicks.
I digress, I just finished this and the ending had the obligatory killer explaining his/her motives to the final girl...and I still don't know why the killer did all that killing. But, at least it's hilarious whenever the killer's onscreen: we just see this shadow of the killer with the javelin posed to be thrown at the victims and some crazy score. It's fantastic cheese.
But...not as humorous as when they show the javelin travel through the air at the students. I imagine those scenes must be seen by someone high. Most...laughs...ever.
Basically, there's an Olympic training academy run by four red herrings and students are getting, ah-hem, picked off one at a time. Oh, and they're being legally prescribed steroids because 1980s. Not sure if that's relevant because I still don't know the motives of JK, or Javelin Killer.
And no, it's seriously not worth my time to go back and rewatch the ending. I really don't care that much. The movie was extremely hard to watch anyways: the budget was so low, they couldn't afford the electricity to keep the lights on for more than half the film.
I award this movie one extra star for the unintentional comedy and I could see the actors, despite their terrible portrayals and dialogue, really trying. They did put their heart into it. But, more so for the downright, laugh-out-loud scenes.
***
Final thoughts: I don't recall how exactly I learned of this movie - it was just a few days ago I first ever heard of this 1984 slasher film. But, what made me want to see it was the back cover of the VHS which read: "...Far too many people at the academy have motives. Dr. Jordan with his illegal use of drugs in training. Overly-demanding Coach Webber. Lesbian Coach Drew. Therapist Diane Paine, a maternal figure who takes her work into the bedroom..."
Wait. Hold up, 1984. You are seriously lumping in a lesbian into that suspect bunch? And with nothing attached, just "Lesbian Coach Drew"? It's stated that one of the actresses who played a lesbian character took a filming break along with everyone else and came back to the shoot changed into a Born Again Christian and refused to kiss another woman, even for the sake of acting. Huh. Maybe we should've changed "Lesbian..." to "A Born Again Christian student" as a suspect. To me, that's just as offensive.