1/10
Rocker
13 March 2017
When someone starts using the business end of a pair of hedge clippers on the more snobbish patrons of a posh country club, rumors fly the slice-n'-dice handiwork is the signature of The Greenskeeper, a serial killer long thought dead from an explosion years ago. Allen, whose mother owns the country club, begins having nightmare visions where he is haunted by The Greenskeeper. Allen begins to suspect he may have a connection to The Greenskeeper he never dared imagine. Meanwhile, the beautiful jet setters of the club decide to sneak in after hours for some skinny-dipping, partying, and sex-on-the-green. Unfortunately for the teens, The Greenskeeper decides to crash the party, and armed with golf equipment and landscaping tools, begins picking off Izods one by one. Joining forces with his new love interest Elena, Allen races to the club to try to save his friends. He and Elena must play a deadly game of cat and mouse to survive, because when you have a tee time with The Greenskeeper, it's par for the corpse!

Gore should be the main attraction in a low budget slasher film. Of course, it isn't. There was way too much focus on a lame plot than the potentially cool killings. They did manage to have a slit throat, a couple be-headings, an anal insertion golf cleaner, and a hedger through the stomach. The gore was pretty dry and incredibly lazily done. With every potential murder weapon on a golf course they could have done a lot better.

The acting actually wasn't too bad to begin with. It was supposed to be super cheesy, but went overboard towards the end with the lazy/awful lines. Some of the comedy was actually pretty funny and delivered how it was meant to be delivered. Allelon Ruggiero really wasn't too bad as the loser guy. The yuppies were all played obnoxiously well and made me laugh a few times. This truthfully wasn't the bad part of the movie.

It had the b-movie feel, but there really weren't too many mistakes. There were a few bad shots here and there, but nothing that ruined the movie. The lighting and audio was always properly done(sort of.) The fake lightning was completely terrible and happened every time the killer was on the courses. That was totally idiotic. The other bad technical aspect was the music...They felt it was necessary to constantly have cheesy mystery or pop music playing throughout the movie. It really didn't have to be this bad!

Final Thoughts: This totally could have been a really fun movie with the exact same cast and crew members and script even. Cheesy music, bad (and dry)gore, lame effects, and too much plot did this movie in. I really wanted to enjoy it, but it just didn't deliver the goods. Too bad the horror movie they were watching on TV (the milkman) looked more like the movie this should have been.
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