The entire concept of birds sacrificing themselves to knock pigs off construction sets is easily an idea I could have come up with last Friday night at 2:30am after a strong overdose. But who cares, right? That's what makes Angry Birds so oddly engaging to play! So of course, this is the perfect material to make a motion picture out of! And you know what, The Angry Birds Movie is the most beautiful, most thoughtful experience I've ever sat through in a cinema, met with some wonderful characters, hilarious gags, and a message that is suitable for all ages.
Ha! Had you there, didn't I? Gosh, I almost had to force myself to type that. Right from this film's announcement, I was expecting this movie to be just a series of super unfunny gags only toddlers would find funny, along with a real overused message to make this feel like somewhat of a complete movie. And sure enough, the result met all my expectations to the tee. I mean, come on. I have always enjoyed the iPhone game, but how could a 97-minute story of these birds possibly be decent?
Well, just like this:
Step 1. You make the main character an underdog with an anger issue who is disrespected by the town. Step 2. You set up his team through an anger management class. Step 3. You introduce the green pigs as the main villains a quarter of the way through the movie. Step 4. You make the main character the only one in the town who knows how to stop these bad pigs. Step 5. You let these bad pigs steal the eggs of the birds in the town in order to eat them. Step 6. You make the town's savior an absolute moron who the main character loses hope in. Step 7. You save the actual game-playing part until the final moments, and only for five minutes tops. Step 8. You throw in puns. Lots and lots of puns.
I've gone crazy now after hearing, "Happy hatch-day, Pluck my life, Insta-ham, and Kevin Bacon in Hamlet." But you know what? Toucan play at this. If this movie can go mad with bird and pig puns, so can I!
The movie's egg-selent screenwriter Jon Vitti got his start writing adult comedies such as SNL and The Simpsons, and maybe he should have left his nest there. While he does sprinkle in some jokes that will fly over the kids' heads, a majority of the humor here is winging it toward the 12 and younger crowd. But maybe that's not the problem. Maybe the problem is that he wrote out each character rather faithfully to their virtual counterparts, yet entirely unmotivated and all-around fowl. Every bird and pig in this movie is either:
A. Useless B. Rude C. Dumb D. All the above
Owl go with option D.
You know that white egg-shaped bird named Matilda? She's the teacher of the anger management class now, and is all sweet and calm, despite being an "angry" bird. Then that yellow triangle-shaped bird named Chuck is voiced by Josh Gad, and he is literally Olaf on crack. His best friend is that black bomb bird, and together they are so annoying that you ought to flip the bird at each of them. The enormous bird, named Terence, is the closest thing to funny this movie gets to, and he just flew right by without enough screen time. Then there's the little blue bird that splits into three, who doesn't even show up until the end-credits scene. Oh, and I guess there's Red. Yeah, no comment.
The world of these birds is also rather cheep. Basically it is all recreated from the designs in the game as well as the Toon series. I'm sure it is a beautiful and creative world on screen, but I couldn't exactly tell, as everything in the frame was moving too fast for me to get a good look at the details. But essentially, the most genius thing they come up with is a pregnant bird carrying her egg strapped onto her stomach like a pregnant human. Yeah, seriously —what the duck?!
The jokes probably would have quacked me up if the animators actually took a breather in between each pratfall and each piece of rapid- fire dialogue. Also, if some jokes were removed entirely, that would help enormously. By jokes, I mean nipple gags, a bird beating up a statue, a malfunctioning stairway, and an eagle peeing into a pond for a full minute (yes, this movie actually resorts to that hawkward level of humor).
Okay fine, maybe there are a few redeeming messages. It does try to affirm that anger is good motivation to fighting for the right causes, but it's entirely forgotten by the last few moments and is even deliberately mocked by the characters themselves. So yeah, no important values to be found here!
I'm talon you, if a movie about the Angry Birds really needed to exist, then it should have be done by artists who actually gave a hoot to the kids and the parents who had the birden of allowing the ticket prices to go on their bill. But even judging by an Angry Birds fan, this movie is not boosting the popularity of the franchise in any way. If anything, it's just going to hurt the franchise. So stick with the game, there's no peeing eagles.
Overall Grade: F
Ha! Had you there, didn't I? Gosh, I almost had to force myself to type that. Right from this film's announcement, I was expecting this movie to be just a series of super unfunny gags only toddlers would find funny, along with a real overused message to make this feel like somewhat of a complete movie. And sure enough, the result met all my expectations to the tee. I mean, come on. I have always enjoyed the iPhone game, but how could a 97-minute story of these birds possibly be decent?
Well, just like this:
Step 1. You make the main character an underdog with an anger issue who is disrespected by the town. Step 2. You set up his team through an anger management class. Step 3. You introduce the green pigs as the main villains a quarter of the way through the movie. Step 4. You make the main character the only one in the town who knows how to stop these bad pigs. Step 5. You let these bad pigs steal the eggs of the birds in the town in order to eat them. Step 6. You make the town's savior an absolute moron who the main character loses hope in. Step 7. You save the actual game-playing part until the final moments, and only for five minutes tops. Step 8. You throw in puns. Lots and lots of puns.
I've gone crazy now after hearing, "Happy hatch-day, Pluck my life, Insta-ham, and Kevin Bacon in Hamlet." But you know what? Toucan play at this. If this movie can go mad with bird and pig puns, so can I!
The movie's egg-selent screenwriter Jon Vitti got his start writing adult comedies such as SNL and The Simpsons, and maybe he should have left his nest there. While he does sprinkle in some jokes that will fly over the kids' heads, a majority of the humor here is winging it toward the 12 and younger crowd. But maybe that's not the problem. Maybe the problem is that he wrote out each character rather faithfully to their virtual counterparts, yet entirely unmotivated and all-around fowl. Every bird and pig in this movie is either:
A. Useless B. Rude C. Dumb D. All the above
Owl go with option D.
You know that white egg-shaped bird named Matilda? She's the teacher of the anger management class now, and is all sweet and calm, despite being an "angry" bird. Then that yellow triangle-shaped bird named Chuck is voiced by Josh Gad, and he is literally Olaf on crack. His best friend is that black bomb bird, and together they are so annoying that you ought to flip the bird at each of them. The enormous bird, named Terence, is the closest thing to funny this movie gets to, and he just flew right by without enough screen time. Then there's the little blue bird that splits into three, who doesn't even show up until the end-credits scene. Oh, and I guess there's Red. Yeah, no comment.
The world of these birds is also rather cheep. Basically it is all recreated from the designs in the game as well as the Toon series. I'm sure it is a beautiful and creative world on screen, but I couldn't exactly tell, as everything in the frame was moving too fast for me to get a good look at the details. But essentially, the most genius thing they come up with is a pregnant bird carrying her egg strapped onto her stomach like a pregnant human. Yeah, seriously —what the duck?!
The jokes probably would have quacked me up if the animators actually took a breather in between each pratfall and each piece of rapid- fire dialogue. Also, if some jokes were removed entirely, that would help enormously. By jokes, I mean nipple gags, a bird beating up a statue, a malfunctioning stairway, and an eagle peeing into a pond for a full minute (yes, this movie actually resorts to that hawkward level of humor).
Okay fine, maybe there are a few redeeming messages. It does try to affirm that anger is good motivation to fighting for the right causes, but it's entirely forgotten by the last few moments and is even deliberately mocked by the characters themselves. So yeah, no important values to be found here!
I'm talon you, if a movie about the Angry Birds really needed to exist, then it should have be done by artists who actually gave a hoot to the kids and the parents who had the birden of allowing the ticket prices to go on their bill. But even judging by an Angry Birds fan, this movie is not boosting the popularity of the franchise in any way. If anything, it's just going to hurt the franchise. So stick with the game, there's no peeing eagles.
Overall Grade: F