Future Kick (1991)
3/10
"Sit back, relax, and let us control your mind"
10 May 2015
This is a remarkably bad movie, even by Don Wilson's meager standards. I'm sure there are folks in the world who enjoy low-budget, sci-fi B-movies and for whom FUTURE KICK fulfills some personal niche, but for me, this is just lousy, unimaginative filmmaking, the only good thing about which is that it sets a low standard to which all future Don Wilson sci-fi outings thankfully rise above.

The story: In a dystopian future where corporations control the world, a wealthy female moon-dweller (Meg Foster) arrives on earth to track down her husband's murderer - a task for which she enlists the aid of the last member of a race of lethal androids (Wilson).

Give cult producer Roger Corman credit for being game enough to give every weirdo script that fell into his lap a chance; a filmmaker would *have* to be pretty indiscriminant to try and make something of this. Mind you, this isn't to say that the script co-written by Catherine Cyran couldn't have been made into a decent film, but rather that the movie makers were foolish to attempt it on what must have been a small budget. With a plot that clearly outweighs this one's financial resources, the results include embarrassing computer effects, cheapo sets that hardly convey it's a futuristic setting, and a perpetually dark lighting scheme. This last aspect is the worst for me: absolutely every scene is filmed in shadow, making the movie an entirely depressing experience.

The film features five fight scenes; three of them are crud and the other two (including a showdown between Wilson and his late friend Chris Penn) are only marginally better - all thanks to that awful lighting scheme. Beyond that, there's only a car chase to see, and a bucketload of gore. This one's clearly the bloodiest flick Wilson ever starred in, but even that isn't worth seeing the film for by itself. Characters are lucky if they're two-dimensional, seeing as some (e.g. Don Wilson himself) are completely lacking in character at all. Bad guy Eb Lottimer goes through the whole movie stabbing people and ripping their hearts out, but at the end he's still the most boring serial killer you'll ever see.

What else can I say? I have nothing substantially good to write about this one. Admittedly, I've never been a fan of Don Wilson's movies, but this is the absolute low for him. I don't often blame a single movie for ensuring a director's success or lack of, but man, am I not surprised that Damian Klaus hasn't made another picture since this one.
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