2/10
Cheapo Spanish-shot sci-fi monstrosity
17 March 2015
Warning: Spoilers
Here we have yet another crappy B-movie hiding under a number of different titles to try and get unsuspecting horror fans to watch it, I found it under the title of MUTANT II although it bears absolutely no similarity to the first film in any way, shape or form. Instead what we have is a Spanish-set (because it was cheap to film there, I guess) teen movie which occasionally has a small, pathetic alien monster pop up to kill off minor cast members before disappearing again.

I pretty much hated most of this movie, even down to the rip-off title. You'll often find it sitting in "worst movie" threads and in this case I would be forced to agree, as I found very little indeed to enjoy. The best thing the film has going for it is Dennis Christopher. Christopher has made a career starring in junk like this (anyone see THE SILENCERS? Don't!) and to be honest, he's the life and soul of the film. At least he's the only guy to actually try and act and, although his character is irritating in the extreme, you still end up liking him. Unlike the other two "teenage" stars Martin Hewitt and Lynn-Holly Johnson; unbelievable and wooden are two good words to describe their particular acting style.

Hmm I couldn't care less about the plot of this film, not that there really is much of one. For a start, we see a space pod land on earth and five years later a cow gives birth to an alien monster in a pretty yucky scene. Dogs arrive and begin eating the entrails before they are dragged yelping inside the bloody carcass. Sounds good huh? Well it would be apart from the fact you can see glimpses of human hands pulling the dog inside the body of the cow. It kind of ruins the effect.

Well, shortly after this we meet up with the three teens and their camper van or whatever the hell it is they're riding in. There's a love triangle thing going on with this trio and it gets boring really quickly. Sadly they use it to pad out lots of scenes so prepare to put your finger on the fast-forward button. Anyway, the teens and a couple of suspicious scientists all converge on a sleepy little village. It turns out there's a scientific research institute hidden underground in an old building (!) and a scientist is trying to control the contamination. The alien predator can spread from person to person and also impregnates them (hmm, where have we heard that before?).

Unexplainedly the townsfolk (whom we never actually SEE) block the only exit from the town and run around in armoured vehicles killing off various innocent folk. For a moment I thought I was watching a re-run of DUEL again as characters engage in various night-time car chases while cheesy '80s music plays in the background and credibility goes out of the window. Half an hour goes by without any mention of the alien whatsoever! In the end the film just kind of finishes without any resolution and the "threatening" monster is killed in the lamest way imaginable, being wiped off somebody's windscreen with the windscreen wipers and crushed under the wheel of the car. I'm not sure if this was a spoof on the old horror convention of having indestructible monsters but it wasn't a very funny one at that. A shame because the special effects of the briefly-seen slimy arachnid monster are pretty cool, it's just a shame that the creature is so small as to hardly pose any threat whatsoever.

Filled with boring scenes of action, bad acting from most of the cast and poorly-produced to boot, I can't really see any reason to recommend this film at all. All I can say is that some of the special effects are yucky but these are only glimpsed due to the low budget. As for being scary, well no, but actually some of the weirdo townsfolk are pretty creepy (the guy in the spooky mask and the wild-haired waitress are but two) and more frightening than the actual monster in the film. My best advice is to avoid this no-budget mess of a film and actually get something substantial instead.
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