2/10
Adolescent male fantasies
6 July 2014
Warning: Spoilers
The movie that dares to show why gold lamé armor never caught on in the Middle Ages. Ostensibly, this is a story about a cursed goblet, the result of a knight killing a sorceress and her pet latex dragon. Once the cup is found by an unlucky archaeologist, it appears at random in several subsequent vignettes, randomly and purposelessly. However, every segment involves violent sex and obvious marital aids--why? We don't know. But every adolescent male fantasy is here: dragons, swords, magic helping you get girls, being well-endowed to the point of wielding a deadly weapon, and even Nazis.

Technically, the movie is primitive on every level; it is clearly low-budget. Even the lighting is bad, but not as bad as the gore effects. The acting is not skillful, but quite enthusiastic in the sex scenes.

The opening and closing credits were annoying; just random images against a garage-band level track. There's really nothing to hang your hat on here (except maybe the marital aids mentioned earlier).
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