2/10
Put the whiny four year old in a Christmas special, and you're in for one miserable holiday.
23 December 2010
Caillou's Holiday Movie is based off of the seemingly harmless, but very harmless kids program Caillou. Caillou is a show aimed for kids at around age four, the same age as the title character. Caillou's Holiday Movie is the first film focusing on the four year old kid, and it should rightfully be the last. It's worse than when Arthur got his first full length movie, Arthur's Missing Pal. Well maybe not that bad.

Caillou, to me, isn't the greatest influence on kids in the 21st century. For God's sake he whines about something every five minutes. He has his own show, and he sings the annoying lyrics to his own theme. How can he be so melancholy around Christmas time? Not just Christmas time, but year round the kid doesn't even count his blessing. "But mommy, I want to go noooooow!" Shut the hell up, Caillou. Or should I say it's French connotation? Bald head. Put some hair on the kid already! No offense to anyone, but he looks like an untreated Cancer patient.

As the movie unfolds, it basically focuses on Caillou's anticipation and high hopes for the holiday season. To ease the excitement, and to patient the hyperactive toddler, his mom and dad get an advent color. Although this one doesn't leave behind chocolate or trinkets, it tells the stories about how other cultures celebrate their holiday season. Caillou learns that we may all live on the same planet, but our traditions are all but unique.

My question is plain and simple - why the hell would you buy an advent calendar that passes on nothing but information not relating or effecting you in any way, shape, or form to a four year old kid? I get that his folks are supposed to be showing kids the importance of connecting to cultures and making note that not everyone puts up a tree and waits for a big jelly bowled gluten in a red suit to bring toys. But it's likely unless this is a kid's first memorable, Christmas of significance, he will know what an advent calendar is. I guess Caillou was so excited about delve into culture's traditions he forgot about the chocolate.

Besides, aren't you just teasing the kid by passing on more useless information to him when you are trying to make him patient for Christmas? This all could have been resolved with a little piece of chocolate for 24 days. But why the hell am I doing pros and cons over an advent calendar Caillou gets that doesn't even exist? I just wasted my typing skills.

The nail that seals the coffin in this special is that IT'S A DREADED MUSICAL. I don't mind musicals if it's something I can get into (ie: The Rocky Horror Picture Show and The Sound of Music), but when the songs are being song by a talentless kid with no singing experience EVER in his four years of life, than I don't like them. Why does every special need to be a damn musical now? GLEE isn't enough, we have every kids special on TV singing their hearts out. My favorite musical ever conducted in a Christmas special, besides It's Christmas, Charlie Brown, is probably Arthur's Perfect Christmas. Now that was an enjoyable special. Arthur and his friends possessed more singing talent than Caillou or any of his four year old companions.

The film rarely hits a high note, and by day eight, you're begging for it to be over. I used to tolerate Caillou when I was real young, but as I've gotten older I realize the show is an annoyance all together. Whenever I turn it my dad comes down and says "That kid still ain't got no hair?" I laugh and usually change the channel, and ask myself why I made that foolish move. Caillou's Holiday Movie isn't the absolute worst thing to come out this holiday season. But it's far from the most memorable thing. I'd still rather watch Arthur's special or maybe Cyberchase's New Year special.

Starring: Annie Bovaird, Merlee Shapiro, Jennifer Seguin, and Pat Fry. Directed by: Nick Rijgersberg.
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