...Self indulgent, pointless, meaningless... Why, how and what on earth enabled this train wreck to ever get made? Even the likes of Gary Oldman, Robert Carlyle, Billy Zane and Terence Stamp aren't sufficient to turn this mess around, rather they are mostly dragged down with it, with the possible slight exception of Carlyle, who's performance offers at least a little entertainment when he comes on the screen. The two young leads that hold the "plot" together are utterly weak and are putting me to sleep as I write this. Half way in and it's still just painful!!! I mean all the hallmarks of poor film-making: self conscious direction, miserable attempts at clever plot devices and witless attempts at humour. One of the worst, most agonizingly annoying scores imaginable. And what the hell is up with all the stupid CGI hearts?! If you value your time even a little bit, do not waste it on this... I am officially pulling the plug now...45 minutes in.