10/10
Unsafe at Any Speed
2 November 2006
I caught this little honey on DVD last night, at three AM, working third shift in the basement of the hospital...the perfect place, in other words, to check out fast-and-dirty, balls-out, low-budget, whacked-out horror feast.

This is the first movie I've seen by whoever D.W. Kann is, but it's not gonna be the last. Kann & Co. drive ANUBIS like a kid's first car, a five-speed deathtrap built out of dynamite and chicken wire. It's got cracked headlights, fenders falling off, and the windshield wipers flipping in every direction -- but it's also painted day-glo red, the Spark-o-Matic's cranked to eleven and there's enough firepower in the trunk to send the whole enterprise halfway to Pluto. And although there are moments when you think whoever's in charge of this thing must be high on glue or steering with their feet, the responsible parties rocket the action forward with the dead-on instincts and passion of somebody who's watched a ton of movies, loves 'em with all their heart and knows what works and what doesn't. Mix it all together with the screwball comedic elements that had me snuffing up my Coke Zero more than once, and you've got raw, uncooked brilliance.

In DANSE MACABRE, Stephen King talks about how true horror fans ought to be patient when it comes to the breed of movies they love -- or moments they love in movies that might not be altogether successful. Is ANUBIS perfect? Not by any stretch of the imagination. Is there enough octane here to get your rocks off for an hour and a half? Abso-freakin'-lutely.
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