Ultraviolet (1998)
Ultraboring
8 August 2000
My God but this was the most dismal and slow-moving thing to come out of England since Margaret Thatcher. There were a few bright spots as the series tried to add a new modern spin on the vampire legend and add modern technology and explanations for them, but that's really all it's got going for it. Let's face it, it's very hard to make a good modern vampire movie or TV series. John Carpenter tried and failed, and Quentin Tarantino's attempt is virtually unwatchable. Well, they tried at least.

All in all, the series seems like a imitation of the short-lived American series "Prey", which dealt with a similar theme of cutting-edge technology used by and against clandestine subhumans. But "Prey" dealt with the themes of paranoia and underground conspiracies (both human and not) a lot better than this one. And had more likeable characters. The good guys here aren't very good; even our purported hero doesn't make much of an impression. Every character has about as much personality as a gray Brixton afternoon. And maybe it's just that I'm not British, but I couldn't understand word one of what they were saying. The performances were so low in key and low in volume, and their acting so wooden, that I was rooting for the vampires.

The only reason to watch this is to see the lovely Colette Brown, who plays the longsuffering Kirstie. She's easily one of the most beautiful British actresses I've ever seen. Apparently she does a lot of British television, TV movies and the like. Too bad; I think she'd be great in feature films.
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