Review of The River

The River (1997)
3/10
Now my neck hurts.
15 August 2003
Oh, the horror of it all. The ennui. The angst. The isolation.

Must drink ... double shot ... of ... espresso ...



Interesting themes, but a borderline unwatchable movie. This thing makes an Antonioni film look like "Indiana Jones". The use of real-time filming (or whatever technique the film school flunkies are calling it) is interesting in spurts, but it was just plain cruel and unusual punishment here. I get the feeling that the individuals who loved this movie are the same ones who would declare a two hour movie of someone peeing pure genius. Thankfully ming-liang had the decency to keep his pure peeing scene to only 4 minutes. I was rivetted wondering how the sound of it would change as we proceeded from the second, to the third, to the fourth minute. Enthralling filmaking.



If you enjoy watching paint dry I give this movie my highest recommendation. If you expect even a hint of entertainment value in your films I give it a 3/10.
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