gluonpaul Reviews

Seoul Station (2016)

Superb animation and an engaging story

[8/10 · 8 March 2020]

The animation itself was superb, the voice acting was great (at least in the original Korean I dont know if there is a dubbed version in English) and the story line again very moving.

My only real gripe is that unlike train to busan when the social commentary was more nuanced and better integrated into the story here its a bit blunt with its point.

Still its both interesting and engaging to watch and I certainly recommend it if you liked Train to Busan.

Brahms: The Boy II (2020)

Decent sequel though not quite as good as the first

[7/10 · 1 March 2020]

I really dont know why this movie doesnt seem to be appealing to a lot of people I thought it was decent.

The acting was good, it kept up a suspenseful atmosphere and managed to make sure you felt tense at all the right times. It was a continuation (obviously) of the boy and while I will admit I thought the first one was better this was still a decent sequel.

My suggestion would be to give it a try at least, while i dont think this was a spectacular classic it was in my opinion an enjoyable watch and worth the time to give it a try.

The Grudge (2019)

Well crafted story but it fails to bring the fear.

[5/10 · 28 January 2020]

I would say around a 5.5 would be fair for this movie, but a 6 just felt a little too generous. The thing is there is a lot to like in this, the movie has a lot of good callbacks to the original Ju-On and the first american remake, it is well acted and the story itself is very well told here.

The problem is as many critics have picked up it almost exclusively relies on jump scares. The thing is jump scares arent scary, you arent actually scared at all you are just startled. You go to a horror to experience the fear not to jump every now and again. Real fear needs a build up, needs you to see and empathize with the fear of characters on screen and needs a scary image which is not jumped on screen but brought in with foreboding.

Although the third film in the original american trilogy was generally meh, its first scene with a girl trapped in the closet had this in spades. The build up was slow, with the sounds of banging slowly moving towards them, the fear on the persons face as they cannot get the door open evokes fear in you and then the slow moving in of the ghost through the hatch in the ceiling. That is horror, but in this movie you will be watching it and then periodically a ghost jumps out of the dark or something. Thats it.

Such a shame as I say there really is a great and well told story in this movie but it just fails in the most fundamental part of a horror.

Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (2009 Video)

Should be schlocky creature fun ruined with terrible characters

[3/10 · 27 January 2020]

These sorts of movies dont need to do a lot to get at least a decent score from me. If they are fun and have plenty of creature action they can at least get a 5.

Unfortunately while this movie does have some creature action it plays second fiddle to a lot of boring and badly written dialogue. Worse than that the character writing is horrifically bad, with our protagonist making blindingly obvious statements in a really arrogant way and other cartoonish characters telling he she is stupid for saying the blindingly obvious. Painful.

The Japanese guy was actually a decent actor but the rest were at best meh and before long it just seems like any other bad movie in the genre. While I have seen worse, I cant recommend spending your time on this.

The Wrath (2018)

Creepy and suspensful, IMO a movie well worth watching

[8/10 · 2 January 2020]

In my opinion this is woefully undervalued on here at the time I write this and while I can sometimes understand why people would vote a film much lower than i do this time I am at a loss.

The film is wonderfully acted, very creepy and has really well written characters. There are some creepy visuals but its not really a horror in the ju-on category its more about suspense and telling a story about humans and our evils to each other. It felt more realistic in many ways than most horrors because it centered more around those factors.

Very interesting movie, if you read this I hope you will give it a try.

Witching and Bitching (2013)

Funny, outragous and off the wall its very much worth a look

[8/10 · 1 January 2020]

I thought this movie was great. It starts off very normal with a quite funny movie and slightly zany humour. This then slowly builds into an over the top, hilariously funny romp which also manages to bury a few home truths in amongst the jokes and craziness.

Very surreal its technically a horror movie but more realistically I would say it was comedy with a few horror elements.

I honestly hope more people see this, I think its a shame its not better known and currently not as highly rated as I at least believe it should be. At the very least I think its worth a look if you are intrigued.

Zombie Spring Breakers (2016)

One to avoid

[2/10 · 31 December 2019]

Its billed as a comedy horror, it delivers as neither of those.

To give you an idea of the humour one of the earliest "jokes" is one of the actors sitting at a bar at night putting suncream on because as he says "better safe than sorry". The worst part is that lame unfunny joke is still probably the funniest part of the movie.

The three main actresses are actually okay but the three guys in this are terrible, especially the fat guy who thinks he is funny. They have a scene with him trying to act and crying to one of the women they are trapped with and its honestly one of the most painfully bad acting moments in film history.

To be honest while its hard to do a good zombie movie, its very easy to make a bog standard its okay zombie movie and this fails to even achieve that. I suggest avoiding this.

Woodshock (2017)

Well produced but lacking a driving force

[5/10 · 25 December 2019]

There was a lot here with potential. Kirsten Dunst did a good job and the cinematography and production were actually really good.

The problem is although the film has a strong central premise it feels as though it is constantly searching for its fundamental story thread. It never quite manages to provide that compelling central part to the story which the other story threads can be anchored too. Even the main plot line of the grief stricken woman falling into a drug fueled fantasy feels more like a side plot to a missing central story. Its a shame, there really was a lot here to like but it ended up being a mediocre film as a result.

Jumanji: The Next Level (2019)

Just a good old fashioned fun movie

[8/10 · 7 December 2019]

There are not many franchises which have been renewed recently which I have actually thought turned out well. Most have been done badly but I have to say that Jumanji stands out as an exception.

This movie does not have a heavy deep story, doesnt try to be anything more than it is, this movie makes you laugh, keeps you entertained and ensures you leave the theater feeling happier than you went in.

It wont win oscars but it will win your heart, definitely a movie to go and enjoy at this time of year.

Ford v Ferrari (2019)

A well written movie with real characters

[9/10 · 22 November 2019]

This was all round a really good movie, it was funny, emotional, exciting and interesting all at once. The characters felt real and managed to capture genuine human interactions and it all built to provide a very emotional ending.

The sets were great and really gave you a feeling of being back in the 60's and there were some very interesting little tidbits thrown in showing how ww2 had left its scar on many people. It did this while maintaining a careful view of its priorities, it wasnt there to tell you what the 60's were but to use it as a backdrop for a real story.

The acting was superb throughout, Damon really gave a strong performance and Bale really managed to convey well the good and bad character traits with real respect for the person he was representing. Also, although Caitriona Balfe was playing a supporting role I think her performance really needs to be called out. Caitriona managed to portray real strength and respect in a female character, she never went around screaming she was better than men, she instead portrayed real emotions, real reactions and genuine heart. I felt her supporting role was very well done too.

Overall this felt like a movie which had some respect for its audiences intelligence and managed to really provide both genuine escapism and tell a very interesting and engaging story. Highly recommended viewing.

Midway (2019)

Solid, respectful and devoid of modern political statements, a real movie about a real event

[8/10 · 16 November 2019]

This movie was very well done, the acting was very decent, the script was respectful of the content it was covering and quite suspenseful and the effects were very decent.

It may not be in line with some of the classic movies but its an extremely competent and well produced movie which is a genuine spectacle at the cinema.

Well worth viewing I would say.

Official Secrets (2019)

A decent movie but fails to bring as much drama as it should to be really interesting

[6/10 · 18 October 2019]

So this is obviously based on true events but whenever a movie says that they invariably have a bias and sometimes are very far from the real events. This movie for instance portrays all journalists as very erudite and ethical and if the last few years craziness has taught us anything we can state that is clearly and unequivocally false! As such the rest of the review is purely in terms of the movie as entertainment rather than as any kind of testimonial to the real events.

The acting in the movie was generally pretty decent, Matt Smith pulls off a good performance and I really enjoyed Ralph Fiennes in this movie. He managed to put a lot of character and entertainment into his role. I was a bit unimpressed with Keira Knightly in this though, for the most part she just looked tired and bored which certainly didnt add to the drama of the movie as you never got any impression of urgency from her.

Speaking of which that is I think the main failing in this movie. While it has its moments trying to bring some drama to the screen for the most part it falls a bit flat.

Overall its not a bad movie, and it (obviously) has an anti-war message which is admirable but it is at best a rather forgettable example of the genre. I dont think you will be overly disappointed as long as you dont go in with high expectations but at the same time I doubt the movie will make enough of an impression to be memorable in the long term.

The Goldfinch (2019)

Strong storyline with great acting but could have done with a little trimming in the editing room

[7/10 · 30 September 2019]

This movie seemed to drop into theaters without much fanfare which i think is a shame. While it may not appeal to action fans in an age of superhero movies there is a good audience for a movie like this I think.

The story revolves around a young man and takes you through his life, showing key moments bringing his own story to light. In a world filled with tragedy he has had his fair share but really the movie revolves around regret of actions past and a story of growth to rectify those.

The acting is decent though Nicole Kidmans understated acting still shines above all others in this film. The story is moving and has a decent premise carefully crafted into a well told story. My only real gripe of any significance is that it is overly slow at points, particularly in the beginning. On the one hand some build up was needed to bring the audience slowly into a realization of the history but it felt overdone and could have done with a little trimming there in my opinion.

Still though a decent film well worth a watch I would say.

Rambo: Last Blood (2019)

Turns out geriatric Rambo is a badass!

[9/10 · 20 September 2019]

So I must admit I didnt have very high hopes going in to see this movie, the idea of a man in his 70's playing this kind of character combined with the critics scores (which at the moment are appalling low) made me think this would not turn out to be a good film. I was very wrong I am happy to say.

Just like the first movie in the series this movie has a very important lesson embedded in a very gritty and entertaining story. I dont wish to include spoilers in this review so i will just say in that regard that the story revolves around the naivety of youth brought up in a secure environment and just not understanding the brutality of the real world and the consequences that can have.

This movie is fairly gory which is not normally my thing but in the context of a story looking to highlight the brutal realities it has an important part to play in really bringing that home to the viewer.

I have to say this was a great all round movie and if this is indeed the final chapter for the Rambo character I think it really went out with a bang. I strongly recommend going to view this.

Killer Mermaid (2014)

Surprisingly decent

[6/10 · 15 September 2019]

I can understand some of the lower scores for this movie to be fair. It starts off pretty slow and there is quite a lot of people just walking around the island. That part is pretty boring.

Having said that it really picks up when the action starts. The special effects were actually pretty decent and the story was quite unique. Once you get to the action in the movie its actually pretty decent. worth a watch I would say.

The Informer (2019)

A decent movie

[8/10 · 7 September 2019]

This is not normally my kind of movie but I quite enjoyed it. The characters all felt pretty realistic, the actors all did a decent job and the story was compelling.

It did feel a bit slow at points and I think maybe a little careful trimming could have done the film some good but even so it keeps you engaged and doesnt leave itself too open to easy prediction as you watch.

Worth a watch I would say.

Crawl (I) (2019)

Good production values and acting but it cant hide a terrible script

[4/10 · 23 August 2019]

So there is plenty in this to like, the special effects are decent, the acting is decent and the production values are very good. Unfortunately its all built on the foundations of a very very poor script.

The father seems to only be there to provide someone to constantly need rescuing by the daughter and provide a backdrop of history for the protagonist (often at very stupid times). At one point they had just seen a police officer get torn apart & eaten and he launches into a speech about the daughter learning to swim. I mean really????

On top of that the protagonist is basically the very definition of a mary sue. At one point for instance this huge alligator has her leg clamped in his jaws and this 80 pound woman kicks it in the face with her bare foot to get it to let go, on top of which all she had as an injury was a minor gash on her leg. Absolutely crazy, and this goes on througout the movie, we see her outswim alligators in the water as well for instance.

Overall I have to say with a decent script it could have been a good concept but with some frankly student film level script problems it just isnt that great in my opinion. Not a terrible movie, but not really worth seeking out.

Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood (2019)

What a fantastic allegory

[10/10 · 17 August 2019]

I have never considered myself a Tarantino fan as such, though I have seen most of his movies and they have always been interesting and decent movies. Given I have rated this movies so high though I think thats worth noting, I think as a stand alone movie this really was exceptional.

I really wish I would have the chance to speak with the movie creators with this one to see if my interpretations match with their vision. There is so much here to unpack if you look into it.

The movie has elements which hark back to a golden age, when people in Hollywood made movies and TV to entertain and to venerate hero's. At that same time this also seems to show so much that reflects modern society. You have the man who has been accused of a crime (killing his wife) and who everyone as judged and punished without any proof that the accusation is true. You have all the elements in hollywood which have led to its devolving into a mockery of itself, just repeating old stories and having no true imagination any more. Its all set to a background of a man who feels like he is over the hill, and struggling to come to terms with the way things are changing.

All of this comes with a side story, which mimics the true stories of the manson family. Those who know the story of the mansons know these were left wing "hippies" as they were known, who preached love while in reality using this as nothing more than an excuse to justify terrible actions by calling people they didnt like fascists. In reality the story of the mansons involved a group of four innocent people, including a pregnant woman who was brutally murdered by several of the girls who supported manson and manson himself. This movie however does something truly brilliant with its ending. Instead of mirroring the reality, this movie instead has the final scene doing what Hollywood always did, it paints reality as though the bad guys can never win. Instead of reflecting what really happened our heros have a redemption arc, killing the evil hippies.

I would be absolutely fascinated to speak with the creators of this movie and see if they agree with my interpretation, and if a movie can make you think this much while also entertaining you the whole time, well that movie is truly fantastic.

Amphibious Creature of the Deep (2010)

Honestly a bit of a shame as there was a lot of potential here

[5/10 · 2 August 2019]

So this movie is a bit hard done by with the score at the moment I think (at a 3.8 as I write this) but unfortunately I can understand why people have given it that score.

This movie has a LOT of good points, the character writing is honestly great, the two main actors (the ships captain and the female marine biologist) are decent actors and the others are all reasonable too, the story is well thought through and keeps its focus throughout. Its also really well shot as well and the creature idea is quite unique. So why the low score?

Well despite doing all of that well, the fact is this is a creature feature film in which you really dont see the creature at all until the final scene. Before that the kills are all masked and quite unsatisfying. Its a creature feature film... which doesnt focus on the creature. Ultimately if you put this in hoping for some simple monster fun, you really dont get much of that.

Its honestly a real shame I would have liked to have given this a higher score.

Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)

A lot of fun, well worth watching

[8/10 · 2 August 2019]

There was a lot to like here, its got a lot of schlocky fun action, a lot of quips and character development and some decent acting on top.

There was a scene with some obvious maclaren product sponsorship but you dont even mind that because the car chase scene it was in was really well done.

The overriding theme of family was maybe a bit on the nose in parts but it had a story to tell and did it well. Overall a great fun action movie which I can highly recommend going to see.

Also love the fact that the virus which turns your guts to jelly is called snowflake... just love that.

Eden Log (2007)

A decent movie but not the classic I think it wants to be

[7/10 · 21 July 2019]

There was a lot to like about this movie, the acting was good, the basic story premise was interesting and the way the story was told was patient and considered.

Unfortunately although there was a lot to like there were a few things which really detracted for me, notably the end (which i will not spoil) felt a bit heavy handed with the imagery. It was painfully obvious what message the writer and filmmakers were saying which really undermined some of the more subtle build up. In addition there were times with the recorded playback sections which were hard to watch. i get they were trying to make it look like a realistic playback but for a film you want the action on screen to be clear for the audience.

Still overall I think it was a decent movie with an interesting premise for the storyline. Worth watching I think.

Midsommar (2019)

Well that was certainly.... interesting

[7/10 · 15 July 2019]

Calling this a horror is really quite misleading, thats not an accurate moniker to give this movie. It is definitely a movie which makes you feel shock, and unease aplenty but its really not horror, rather its a quite unique movie which manages to create a very uneasy and frankly at times quite queasy feeling while you watch it.

Its definitely worth a watch, a very curious movie with a lot of artistry. Some of the story is told in very interesting ways as well, from the less subtle like panning across telling local pictures to interesting hints such as the runes on the hand drawn picture of the girl along with the same runes on her tunic later.

Its very difficult to explain a lot of this movie without a lot of spoilers and frankly I would very strongly recommend you watch this movie without any spoilers. The feeling will be far more visceral that way.

My final verdict, very much worth watching but expect to feel quite uncomfortable at times.

Troy: Fall of a City (2018– )

The most ignorant "historical" series I have ever seen

[1/10 · 17 June 2019]

The BBC made this? This is the most significant indication of the fact that the BBC has fallen into a hole so deep they cannot even see the light of day any more.

This showed a total ignorance of not only the story of Troy but just of classical civilisations full stop. Every aspect of this was laughable from a historical perspective.

Okay so what about as entertainment? nope. None to be had here, terrible writing, terrible acting. Just plain terrible.

How is it possible to make something this bad when you have the money and support the BBC has? If I tried to make something this bad with the budget of a student film I just dont think it would be possible for me to be that incompetent.

Planet of the Sharks (2016 TV Movie)

So bad I turned it off before the end

[1/10 · 14 June 2019]

All I wanted from this was a schlocky fun shark movie, it takes a lot to not even be able to reach those heights!

I have sat through movies clearly made on home cameras but this was so painfully boring I just couldnt make it through. The actresses where awful, the story was boring (its a story about a planet of sharks how the hell did they make that boring?), the shark attacks were simplistic and felt like they were added purely because they felt they had no choice.

Zero fun to be had here, move on.

All Through the House (2015)

A genuinely unique backstory for the killer

[6/10 · 3 June 2019]

So in many ways this is a fairly generic slasher movie.

The acting isnt bad but isnt amazing, there is a lot of T&A as is common in these movies and plenty of gore and kills. The killers mask is actually pretty creepy which I thought was good, not often the killer genuinely is a bit creepy.

For the most part though this was a fairly generic slasher movie but, without giving any spoilers, I will say the backstory for the killer turned out to be pretty unique. Thats hard to come by nowadays. Overall really not a bad slasher movie at all, maybe not a classic but very watchable.