lainesux Reviews

Zoo (2007)

I Have No Words

[6/10 · 13 February 2018]

I found this Youtube, thank God I didn't pay for this. It's exactly what you think it is.

A documentary about a guy getting anally penetrated by a horse and then dying as a result. Also, there's other interviews with other Zoophiles. Yes, they are just as pathetic and creepy as you think they are. They attempt to justify their behavior by flimsy excuses. "It's natural." "These horses aren't coerced." "We love them like family." As though having sex with an animal isn't something one can control. It's society's fault, not theirs, that they are judged.

These animals are trained to have sex with their handlers, but these men claim otherwise, despite there being tools in the barn contrary to that.

They claim horses react to human male sex hormones and this results in mounting. Yeah, I have no idea either.

That's my main problem with this film. The men who are, largely, responsible for a man's death do not feel guilt. They feel unjustly judged. They let a man die on their property, but that's the thing that gets to them. Their animal brothel is shut down, and that's what prompts their outrage.

These men are creepy, sound creepy. There is nothing romantic about having sex with an animal. Thank God, they including the horse's new handler Jenny to say 'Yeah no, that's bullshit.' She's a blessing. XD

An interesting movie if you have an hour or two to waste, and you can find it for free.

I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House (2016)

I Am The Only One, Who Was Not Bored By This Movie.

[10/10 · 10 February 2018]

This movie is not for those who are used to fast paced, break neck horror. This is more for those who are familiar with and enjoy Gothic literature. If you don't enjoy penny dreadfuls or the dark romantics, you will not enjoy this movie. (Not to say there's anything wrong with that, everyone has their own tastes. I'm just saying this movie won't be for you.) If you aren't watching closely enough, you may miss important details.

I understand why this movie is getting negative reviews, because people came in wanting one thing and left with another. But, the movie itself is beautiful.

It's color palette and cinematography are to die for, and the writing in the movie is superb. The acting is just on the right side of subtle, and the quiet atmosphere really drew me into a false sense of security, only to push me out of my comfort zone.

The story, at it's core., is about Polly Parsons, a young bride who is murdered and 'buried' behind the walls of the home her husband built for her. She begins to tell her tale to writer Iris Blum, who turns it into a national best seller. Iris tries to communicate with the ghost again, only for Polly to go silent and literally turn her back on her. "You turned your back so often, you're feet were facing the wrong way round."

Over the years, Iris deteriorates. She wants to die in her home, with Polly. Lily (yes, I did do the thing where I screamed "oml dats my name.") comes in as her hospice nurse. Lily begins to uncover these stories, only to die of fright as soon as she sees Polly. She stays in the house, effectively becoming Polly.

The symbolism in this movie is strong. No details are just put in there by accident.

Iris and Lily, wilting like flowers. The mold that is Polly destroys them. *.*

Like I said, if you enjoy the 'My House is Haunted By Demons' genre, but in the vein of 'The Amityville Horror' or 'Oujia' then maybe skip this one? (Of course, this isn't the only genre you're allowed to enjoy. You can enjoy this movie and those as well.) Otherwise, put your looking googles on. This gon' good.

Guilty Party (2017– )

A resounding meh.

[4/10 · 6 February 2018]

At some points, I really enjoyed this show. But all around, I feel like so much potential was wasted. Scenes are overacted to the point of hilarity and the writing is bland. These don't feel like people to me, they feel like stock characters. There are no stakes, because there is no real 'plot.' Things happen, things are insinuated, but nothing really comes of them.

There are also glaring plot holes that make no sense, and some things that don't make sense in general. For example: Preston's face gets plastered around school, with the word 'cheater' overlayed on it. Everyone's first thought? "Oh, he cheated on a test." That's not what a highschooler would think.

The ending makes no sense, and falls flat. Because the series doesn't want to take any huge risks, the characters all stay the same. The plot is resolved, with no real harm done. The end overall makes the time you spend with the series feel like a huge waste.

If you have some time to waste, I say go for it. But there are much better shows out there, especially webshows, that I wouldn't recommend this to anyone.

Swastika (1964)

A stunning melodrama

[8/10 · 25 January 2018]

The cinematography, the actors, the symbols. Everything is perfectly placed to create a tale of lust, obsession, and betrayal. At first, I wasn't sure if I liked this movie. But toward the middle, the more the plot spun into what seemed like a million different twists I hadn't seen coming, the more and more I trusted this film knew what it was doing. I won't give anything away. But fans of Junji Ito's Tomie would approve of this one. //Little light on the gore though. XD

The End of the F***ing World (2017–2019)

My friend read a Korean Hentai, and I questioned his life decisions. Now, I think his tastes aren't as bad as I thought.

[10/10 · 15 January 2018]

I made a New Years Resolution to watch 20 new (or new to me) shows and movies. My friend choose to read more in this coming new year.

We are both ridiculously competitive, so of course we're keeping track.

My friend is trash. I love him dearly, but he is trash. Of course, when he said he'd watched the first few seconds and loved it, I was skeptical.

But our tastes are mostly similar, so I decided to watch the first episode.

Holy Fuck.

I love these characters.

The two characters start out as insufferable little twats, too focused on themselves to see the world around them could be so much darker. Alyssa deals with an insufferable, domineering stepfather and wilting mom who cares more about her new, refined image than her own daughter. James deals with witnessing the suicide of his mother, and his father who constantly tries to fill the silence. Are these real problems? Of course. But these are teenagers, and they come with the complete teenage overreactions and too cool for school attitude they tend to develop. Each of them start off as stereotypes. Think John Green... only creepier, angrier, and louder.

You see their vulnerability once they're on the road, forced to fend for themselves. James quickly realizes he isn't a psychopath at all when he kills a man, and they're forced once again to see the world through new lenses.

Morals aren't always black and white, the world isn't so different outside their hometown, and people aren't always who they appear to be.

One review called it 'A modern Bonnie and Clyde' and I would have to agree. This also gives me The Voices vibes, minus the talking animals, Ryan Reynolds, and the mental illness.

Layered characters in a complex story? Plus LGBT+ representation in the form of two lesbian police officers? I want my season 2, and I want it now!