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Reviews
Dracula 3000 (2004)
Stupid and lazy
This film was so bad, I had to fast forward through it, hoping Erika would at least get naked. The script writers were so intellectually lazy that it was hard to stand. I like well crafted Dracula movies or even ghost ship vice treasure hunter ones, but this should not even count as being in that genre. Nothing is believable, including the opening where a bunch of guys just sit on their asses while the intern goes on the ship alone. Don't get me started on why using an old warehouse should make us think it is a spaceship or why in the year 3000, guys are still using 20th century 9mm pistols and the professor is in a wheelchair. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
The Dogs of War (1980)
Well done and technically well executed
The Dogs of War is perhaps one of the finest war movies ever made and is the best mercenary movie ever made. From a technical and tactical perspective (with one notable exception when the four main characters stand together improbably for a moment) the movie is extremely accurate and gets both the details of the business correct and the tactics of such an operation correct.
There was a time in the 60s, 70s and 80s when these kinds of operations were carried out by men like Mike Hoare. In the aftermath of Vietnam, veterans who felt out of place and out of sync often fell in with the mercenary crowd, willing to fight someone else's battle for money or loot.
Perhaps one of the more impressive sequences is all of the logistical work which captures the nature of the dark world of the arms deals overseas and how the law is skirted.
Chris Walken is especially effective in the title role; believable, yet vulnerable and certainly not the Rambo who always wins the fight.
Last of the Dogmen (1995)
Unlikely premise, great movie
If you can get past the premise, this is a really good movie. It has all of the elements you could ask for. The cinematography is stunning. After seeing this movie, I started looking at real estate in Banff. There is romance with good and believable chemistry between the leads, well done and believable conflict between Gates and his father in law, humor, commentary on the American West in the form of a moral lecture, and the initial conflict between the two Alpha males that turns to respect and then friendship.
The unlikely star of the movie is really the dog; I don't know if that was intentional or not, but it will make you want to get a dog like that.
My favorite and most disturbing scene is the dream sequence. For better or worse, you can actually see our bloody history with the Indians playing out all over again. That perhaps is the most striking thing about this movie: You can really imagine that perhaps we have not moved forward as a society or culture when it comes to dealing with anything that we do not understand or refuse to learn about.
Miracle at St. Anna (2008)
Should have been so much better
If you are a fan of history movies, as I am, and believe that good history movies can help teach and reach a wider audience than simply giving someone a book to read, as I do, then you really wanted to root for this movie. To its credit and Spike Lee's, the film does address the overlooked role of African American troops during World War Two. Even the Nisei had their movie. There are several good sequences with very powerful images, including the opening, with the protagonist watching the Duke in "The Longest Day" and simply saying, "We fought too." However, the plot is somewhat absurd with too many differing plot lines and even the reduction of the female lead from heroic role model to a love struck swooning afterthought. The racial card becomes a baseball bat; you don't need to be hit in the head numerous times to know that white prejudice and discrimination meant the black troops fought the enemy and their own countrymen.
At first, I thought that the sculpture would take on a more deeply spiritual meaning, which would have made sense, given the deeply religious feeling running through the first part of the movie, but then that line of film seems lost and forgotten.
The movie essentially is a hopeless, unfocused hodgepodge of themes which, if taken by themselves, could have been a compelling narrative. Instead, it seems to me to be more like three films in one.
Van Helsing (2004)
Hugh Jackman call your agent
I must admit, I wanted to like this film. I like Hugh Jackman, but Kate Beckinsale is absolutely wooden in this. The CGI made it more like a comic book than it probably needed to look. This film suffers primarily from its inability to decide whether or not it is self-aware (like the Mummy and the Phantom) with making jokes and asides, or with being dramatic (as in Coppola's version of Dracula). This Dracula seems too campy and not quite sinister. Switching back and forth was a huge mistake.
The second problem with this movie is that too much is borrowed or sampled from other movies; too much Bond, too much imaging from the aforementioned Dracula. The high tech weaponry looks cool the first time out, but gets old quick. Much of the existing scenery is overblown as well, castles all out of whack with symetrical design and utility. They would have been better off sticking to formulaic horror movie. Someone call me when Anthony Hopkins plays van Helsing.
The Park Is Mine (1985)
Modern day revenge movie
Tommy Lee Jones, in an updated version of Taxi Driver, plays a disillusioned, disenchanted Vietnam Vet who only truly feels at home while on patrol. He takes over Central Park in downtown New York City in a believable scenario; seeking control, and seeking recognition, he dominates the city by shutting down the Park.
Jones becomes the indigenous guerrilla, the one who controls the fight by setting the scene and drawing the inept Police into his traps. An excellent movie, ahead of its time, imagine a very human Rambo in downtown New York. The movie does not have a neat ending, like Taxi Driver or even Dog Day afternoon. Instead, it ends as you might like it too.
Zulu (1964)
One of the top three war movies
I don't think you can say enough good things about this movie. As a study of the British Army during the 19th Century, it is outstanding: The interplay between the officers, the sergeants and the foot soldiers is dead on. The sequence between Bromhead and Chard when they discuss seniority may seem petty, but it is true and even goes on today, unfortunately. Caine's performance and transformation is very believable, from a martinet to a true soldier.
I think the best sequence leads to the best line of the movie; the last line of defense, the three tiered barrier shows what this type of fighting truly is: Butchery. Nothing glamorous, not fighting for the King or Queen or whatever, simply fighting for survival. Chard puts it simply: "If it's a miracle, Colour Sergeant, it's a short chamber Boxer Henry point 45 caliber miracle." This is an important point for military historians and theorists that can be applied today. Unconventional warriors fighting a set piece battle against trained, disciplined, well equipped soldiers will lose. However, turn the tables around and the unconventional warriors will win every time. Had the garrison moved out as Bromhead suggests and met the Zulus in an open field, game over.