williamwhitex Reviews

Smartass (2017)

Chaotic good time.

[7/10 · 14 September 2017]

Fans of films like Love and a .45, Natural Born Killers, Killing Zoe, Spun, and those other niche crime thrillers will find quite a delight in this film. Characters are charmingly broken, quick witted, and often borderline sociopaths, but all with seemingly redeeming qualities that won't leave you feeling too guilty for identifying with them, even if just for a moment.

While the titular character often comes off as trying too hard in the role, and there are some snarky bits that feel somehow off, the film is a chaotic thrill ride with interesting characters and story. One part cautionary tale, one part ride-on-the-wild-side, there's enough here to keep just about any fan of the genre occupied.

It (I) (2017)

Pales in comparison to the original.

[5/10 · 14 September 2017]

With the leaps and bounds made in special effects, and the stringent television guidelines placed on the original, I was nothing but hopeful for a remake. The original costuming and other visual bits released to tease had me convinced that this film would be nothing short of spectacular. I don't think I've ever been so wrong.

The child cast is wonderful. They're splendid actors who take to their roles as if they born for them. The story, familiar to all those who braved the original, runs just about the same course as it did in the original series (straying from the book in the areas you know where too taboo to be addressed). No complaint there.

The violence, broadcast in tenuous CGI, isn't alarming in the sense the film-makers intended. It's alarming that the original, showing much much less and leaving more to our imaginations, accomplished far greater scares. The bloodiest bits look more like a made-for-TV effect reel than a major release. Pennywise, the titular being meant to make clowns scary for not just those with coulrophobia, comes off like a dime store version of Tim Curry's rendition. Oafish and at many times grossly and strangely over-acted, I found myself shaking my head in disdain more than fear. It gets so bad at points that I found myself wondering if I should even finish the film.

Overall, I'm greatly disappointed.

Pussy Kills (2017)

Just plain terrible.

[1/10 · 14 September 2017]

The rape/revenge genre has been trite and tired since the can was closed on the original Day of the Woman film. Still, "fans" of the genre use that to their advantage, knowing that the stilted genre contains at least three guaranteed bits: nudity, graphic violence, and revenge that leaves the rapists wishing they were never born. This film? It contains none of that. At all.

Attempting to be a study of some sort of Psych 101 level of dissociation, the film contains no writing or acting that can capture even a hint of what it tries to, other than a handful of tight shots of the main actresses butt in an awful catsuit. I couldn't tell what made me cringe more: the stilted acting, or the terrible entry-level CGI blood in the one or two scenes where they bother showing any.

It's a wandering, poorly acted, poorly situated film that isn't even in the so-bad-it's good wheelhouse. It's just plain bad.