spicyburrito Reviews

The Ice Storm (1997)

Tedious exercise in dysfunction

[16 September 2011]

First I should say, this movie could have been about my town and my family. I grew up in Connecticut and was 11 years old when the ice storm hit. My family was probably the typical dysfunctional unit of the 70's – emotionally clueless, parents headed for divorce (though we didn't know that yet), so I should have been able to relate to this film.

The problem with the movie is there's no humor, no humanity. It's just one dysfunctional, sad, deviant event after another. It's like someone from another planet was assigned a homework exercise to depict dysfunctional families on Earth. I couldn't relate to the characters and there was no one to like.

I'll give it 4 stars for the nice cinematography, the all-star cast, the good period sets and clothes. Although Toby Maguire gives his usual staring-into-space, deer-in-headlights, stupid-half-smile, what-am-I-supposed-to-be-doing-again? performance, I thought the rest of the cast did their best with the material – i.e. it wasn't the actors' fault!

The Pallbearer (1996)

This movie TRIES to be better than this....

[4/10 · 15 August 2006]

In a nutshell: this is a cookie cutter romantic comedy that really WANTS and TRIES to be something more. It wants to be Harold and Maude, Annie Hall, The Graduate. It wants to be deep and human. It has interesting camera shots, lighting, music, editing, all of which give it the feel of an important movie. The dialog is smart -- at times. There are some "laugh out loud" moments.

But here's what keeps it from ultimately being anything more than a formulaic late-night-cable, in-flight, time-killer:

1. David Schwimmer -- how many times can Joe sad-sack puppy dog stare blankly into space with his jaw hanging open before it starts to get annoying? Maybe some drool would have helped.

2. Gwenneth Paltrow -- she's really flat here and not just in the chest. Her role is supposed to be this lively, nice, caring girl who just keeps getting herself into wrong situations, is very confused as a result, and that is why a sad-sack loser like Schwimmer has any chance with her. But Gwenneth plays her very dull. Combine this with puppy-dog drool-face (above) and you have very little chemistry to care about.

(I kept picturing someone else in this role -- Kate Hudson for example.)

3. The script and the plot -- the stuff that happens just basically doesn't ring true; all the problems get wrapped up in the end with such a neat and tidy bow on top that it seems like a whistle blew and the script writers just said "oops, time to wrap it up, got a train to catch!" So they pulled out the Hollywood formula book, checked off all the boxes, and went home.

Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

Isolated pocket of 70's found in dorky Idaho town

[8/10 · 13 November 2005]

We all remember growing up dorky in the 70's. Well, those of us who did, do. Napoleon Dynamite is set in the present time, but aside from the computer that Kip Dynamite uses to chat online with chicks, there is not a single object, prop, car, food product or article of clothing or furniture that would place the action later than, oh, 1977.

The movie creates very meticulously this pristine world of 70's dorkiness plunked down in present day Idaho. Who knows, maybe Idaho is really like that. Maybe no one in Idaho has ever replaced their 70's wood console TV or their antique top-loading VCR, or bought a new car in the last 30 years.

I admit I spent the first half of the movie wondering when any kind of plot was going to happen. The stuff about the dance and the class president election did eventually satisfy the expectation for at least a minimal story line. But make no mistake, the movie is not really about anything other than the trials and tribulations of being nerdy, dorky, shy and/or maladjusted in the 70's, I mean in high school.

I think I laughed out loud exactly one time watching Napoleon Dynamite. Most of the time I simply watched in morbid, mouth-agape fascination, slack-jawed (the occasional drop of drool rolling out), as the characters spun their wheels in seemingly random, frantic, mostly futile and misguided acts of painful dorkiness. If you've never spun your wheels this way, especially in high school, then you probably won't get this movie at all. I think a lot of people probably have, though.