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Reviews
Tudo Bem No Natal Que Vem (2020)
A poor version of Adam Sandler's 'Click' Christmas edition
This movie felt like an imitation of 'Click' but with a Christmas theme.
It is hysterical, unfunny but ultimately watchable as Leandro's performance is not too bad and the age characterization and make up are very good.
But in the end it was exactly what I was expecting from Netflix's typical over the top hype: a blow out of proportion movie who has nothing special about it.
Standoff (2016)
Standoffs are always entertaining but...
Laurence Fishburne doesn't fit well. That absolutely ruthless cold-blooded psychopath with zero humanity left is just not his thing.
...and what the hell was that horn of Gondor kind of noise from the soundtrack? I felt Boromir was about to storm the house any minute!
It was fun but there was a lot of pointless cruelty for a movie who explains nearly nothing of the villain's background.
Full Metal Jacket (1987)
This is my rifle, this is my gun!
I think almost everybody agrees on something here: this movie is divided into 2 parts: the R. Lee Ermey part and the rest! I've always found it incredible that one of the best performances I've ever seen was from a guy who was not an actor and had no experience as one. The man outshines the rest of the movie so much that if you try to explain to people that this is the one where "that sergeant is always screaming during bootcamp" they will immediately understand what you're talking about if they have seen it in the past. It is a memorable picture and the second half is nonetheless impactful too!
In the Line of Fire (1993)
Malkovich's masterpiece
This is one the best average movies I've ever seen. I don't mean this as an insult but this is the typical serial killer movie where everything that was supposed to be average was very well done. All I cared at the end was Eastwood's spirit with Malkovich's amazing performance that created an extremely enjoyable picture!
Gladiator (2000)
Shadows and dust!
A legendary masterpiece that will continue to echo through the ages to be witnessed 1000 times by many generations.
Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)
So cheap...
This is pretty much action pornagraphy and a few steps away from "sharknado ridiculous" without the sharks and incredible bad special effects. 200 millions for this is almost criminal. What did people like about it? The game of thrones references? The WWE presence? The guy who does deadpool ?!? To each their own I guess.
Wonder (2017)
A wonder indeed!
This one touched me deeply. The loneliness, being ugly and cast out. Brilliant movie with a beautiful lesson on many levels.
Rampage (2018)
Very entertaining!
It's got Negan, The Rock, King Kong and a hell of a weird mix between Mega Croc Vs Super Snake and The Avengers kind of "city mess". This thing is WILD!! So wild you can't even realize how ridiculous it is! But it sure as hell was entertaining and had surprisingly good visual effects! You'll have a good time watching this one!
American History X (1998)
Incredible movie
It's a story about hate and how it corrupts you and everyone around you. Edward Norton's performance is absolutely frightening. One of the best movies I've ever seen and one for the ages to be watched as a lesson.
Shallow Hal (2001)
An extra star for the Seinfeld inspiration
I would give it a 5 because this is as average as it gets. However it was very entertaining and "Costanza" was very present in this movie which made it a bit better. It was fun overall.
El hoyo (2019)
Grotesque, horrible, disgusting
.....but, it was necessary because that's exactly what we would be if something like this happened for real. And it sort of happened with this pandemic in 2020. Some of us are really showing the savages and primates that we are.
The ending felt a bit like "ok we don't know how to finish so let's just throw something at the viewers and let them speculate". Probably it was me who didn't get the point. Nevertheless I enjoyed it very much.
Spenser Confidential (2020)
Fun...
So flawed and silly but...what the hell. It was entertaining!
Yedinci Kogustaki Mucize (2019)
Touching on all levels!
There's so much talent outside Hollywood. That's all I have to say for this one.
Uncut Gems (2019)
I wanted to LOVE this movie...
...but I kind of just enjoyed it. The soundtrack is dumb, yes, but the movie as a whole is different in good and bad ways: confusing, stressful, tiring...but Adam did a good job. I wish we could see him more outside of his comedy roles.
Hereditary (2018)
Absolutely terrifying !!
I've watched countless horror movies to the point where practically nothing scares me anymore, counting out cheap jump scares.
Let's just say that this one made me go to bed frightened like an 8 year old child from the pure horror. Just watch it, it is unbelievably scary! Glad that they still manage to make stuff like this away from the crap clichés.
Klaus (2019)
Such a beautiful movie!
There really is something magical about Christmas. And this movie shows exactly that. Deep down we are good and when we find our inner child made out of pure innocence and free from the influence of bad actions and thoughts we will find joy, happiness and we will make ourselves better through making others better. Touching and absolutely beautiful!
Venom (2018)
Ridiculously fast
Movie went by and developed so fast there was no time to actually create anything relevant and exciting. Minimally enjoyable but completely forgettable!
El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie (2019)
A solid tribute
Not much to say here. If you're a fan of Breaking Bad, watch it! You'll identify Vince Gilligan's style from the series and feel like you're watching a couple of episodes you missed. El Camino is clearly inferior to 5 seasons of epicness but it has quality and is enjoyable nonetheless.
Paranormal Activity (2007)
Terrifying
I watched this for the first time in 2019. And I have to say I'm impressed! This was pretty good. The environment felt extremely real and after that demonic yell I could never get my crap together!! Did not care much for the way her face changed right before the ending of the movie but other than that and after watching so many movies, I still found one that almost made me lose my sleep. A solid horror!
Midway (2019)
Amazing technicality. Disastrous performances
I will give this a 7 as a big compliment to the tech crew behind this movie. The visuals are amazing! You can't say the same for Ed Skrein. Bad and lame acting. He tried but failed miserably. I really don't understand what they see in this guy. Anyway, I think everything else aside from the bad actors' performances was pretty good although I prefer Pearl Harbor by a long shot.
Fractured (2019)
Very good surprise!
I sure as hell wasn't expecting much from this. Sam Worthington and Netflix movies ?! No way! Boy was I wrong! This movie made me acknowledge Sam and rise my hopes a little bit when it comes to movies released by netflix. I really don't think IMdB and metascore matter too much nowadays. This story is about a desperate father searching for his family. Vulgar story but with really good tweaks that catches your attention from beginning to end and Worthington definitely helped in making this happen. Sure it has its flaws and plot holes but overall kept me well awake in a dark cold night where I just wanted to go to bed. Very good surprise indeed!
The Shining (1980)
A different type of horror
The Shining isn't necessarily scary! Instead, it creates something much more difficult: a phenomenal Jack Nicholson character development and an unique creepy vintage environment. It's, of course, a must see for all horror enthusiasts and a worthy tribute to Stephen King's work.
Joker (2019)
Great performance but...
Joaquin's performace was brilliant! But I think overall the movie was average. Soundtrack was bad and De Niro didn't sit well in his character. I felt the whole movie's quality was not on par with Joaquin's work. I give it an 8 solely because of his skill which was superb!
Eli (2019)
NEVER trust the Netflix hype and the normie masses!
Really? People seeing demons after this? Hearing noises? So scary? Did you people come out of a cave just a few days ago? Have you NEVER seen a horror movie before? Can't you use your heads every now and then? Do you have to follow every ridiculous trend and hype there is? SCARY ?!?! I've seen drama and comedy movies scarier than this and I'm not even exagerating! I swear people will do and watch and follow whatever society tells them to. This huge mass of regulars is ruining everything good we used to have. The only thing good about this movie is the kid's acting and some special effects. That's it! Grow a brain and think for yourselves and stop following lies ! Have some self respect people! Nobody's impressed if you're "fashionable"!
Jacob's Ladder (1990)
A very weird vibe
This movie bothered the hell out of me. Didn't find it remotely scary but there's a very dark, nihilistic and disturbing vibe to it. Tim Robbins doesn't pull out anything too impressive but the whole picture overral manages to characterize his mind well. It's depressing but worth watching.