luigiterra Reviews

Close Encounters of the Fifth Kind (2020)

Greer cripples UFO credibility for good.

[1/10 · 10 May 2020]

I´ve been a big fan of The Disclosure Project, and when the film Unacknowledged was released, I watched with a kind of disappointment how it all drifted towards a quasi-spiritual personal mumbo jumbo project. It was, however, possible to ignore most of the embarrasing stuff and focus on the actual documentation parts pertaining UFOs. This time, Dr. Greer has gone completely off the rails. Babbling away about his own magic psychic abilities, a godlike power to summon and send away UFOs and aliens, and nutcase claims about his friends being "assassinated" because of what the know.

It also turns out that the US gvmt almost routinely abduct people in Skunk Works built UFOs, where various disabled people act as aliens. This as a tool to manipulate nosy politicians etc. The subject of government funded projects for building precise copies of alien craft and tech is emphasized in the movie. Yet, everything Greer and his companions experiences, is the real thing. I guess Greer can tell because he sends his "mind" into the "ships" to check things out.

It´s just too much to mention. I don´t know if Greer&Co. does this only to make money of simpletons and loonies, or if it´s an actual insight into a completely twisted and delusional mind. Probably a mix of both.

UFO phenomena in and of it self is mind blowing and exciting. The documentation is there, undenied. We are free to explore it in a constructive way. Sadly, Greer and his peers burns to the ground, with this one single travesty of a film, the credibility and curiosity having been carefully built up around UFOs over decades. What could have been a contribution to an open and interesting approach, is drowned by the ridiculous stream of words from the lawyer guy, and of course Greer´s banalities about meditation, consciousness and him self as a sort of christ; he is the chosen one, and we can only fully communicate with aliens through Greer as a proxy.

Oddly enough, Greer also insists that UFOs need telepathic help from us to find where we are so they can show up when summoned. In the next sentence, Greer informs us that the UFO´s represent technologies and evolution "maybe millions of years ahead of us". Still, they supposedly pilot their crafts personally, with control sticks etc, and need Greers help to find Blue Ridge mountain. Not a single time through this massive, uninterrupted or challenged Greer promotion video does anyone even hint to the possibility of UFO´s being some sort of drones, multi-dimensional visitors or other. Instead, they are obviously contained well within our old fashioned understanding of the universe and physics, blazing through space with speeds many times faster than the light, etc.

One thing is for sure: anyone who in the future wants to discredit everything that has anything to do with extra terrestrial phenomenon, need only point to this "documentary" to win the arguments. Courtesy of Dr Greer and his annoying little sect. Sorry for any typos, not my native language.

The Great War (2019)

One of the worst war movie attempts in years

[1/10 · 15 December 2019]

Terrible. First "battle"-scene: Soldiers supposed to storm an enemy position basically jog lazily along the top of the trenches, in daylight, no cover smoke or anything, only waiting to get cut down one by one by a german "machine gunner" who obviously never held anything even slightly resembling a machine gun in his entire life, shaking an trembling stupidly in an attempt to make us believe he is experiencing recoil (he is even totally out of sync with the actual fire rate as we hear it). All the uniforms and all the equipment look brand new and unused, even after the men wearing them get shot to pieces and blown up by "mortar shells" (impact blast radius: 2 meters). No visible injuries or blood, except for when the director obviously mid-battle remembers that there must be some, so the surprisingly and consistently boring camera angle suddenly shows some hands and feet neatly spread out on the ground. The soldiers say things like "they´re tearing us to pieces" and "not a place I would like to stay for very long". An US officer is supposed to freak out and lose it in the face of battle, but when one of the black soldiers (yes, they are the heroes in this story) hit him in the face twice, he snaps out of it and seems completely fine going forward. All forgotten now thanks to the slaps. (What makes everything even more annoying, is that the guy playing the officer does a really good job. It must feel bitter having to waste your talent on this arrogant trash production.) You get the idea. Don´t waste a minute on this. I feel like I´m watching some mob money laundering project where everyone basically just wants to get the hole production overwith and go back to what ever they´re doing in real life.

Mine (II) (2016)

Do NOT waste your time (or money)

[1/10 · 9 October 2019]

The worst sniper in the HISTORY of snipers, and his equally incompetent teammate, sits overtly on top of a cliff where they let a clear and easy target get away after a ridiculous hesitation / arguing. Meanwhile they ask a faceless authority, obviously located in a command place somewhere off location, over the comms what to do about obvious situations. Then, the sniper makes sure to blink his unmasked scope enough for the targets / enemies to spot them, where after they immediately try to escape along a non planned route. During this, they throw their weapons to the ground, down a hill, instead of simply holding them in their hands when jumping down them selves. This is so amateurish, completely not researched and stupidly executed in the first four minutes alone, that the script and directing looks like little more than a bad high school project. This has NOTHING to do with a realistic situation what so ever. Shame on you for demanding money to watch this complete garbage of an attempt at a movie.

Too Old to Die Young (2019)

A truly wonderful piece of violent art

[10/10 · 26 June 2019]

Finally, something, really, really good!! I am left stunned by this epic, artistic rendering of a modern story of violence, cynisism and survival. Refn is Shakespearian and mythological in his expression when he takes us on a cerebral, hypnotizing and scary journey, expertly set to a soundtrack so effective it brings up the same eerie atmospheric gravitation as in American Beauty, Requiem for a dream, even a bite of Apocalypse Now, and of course Only God Forgives. This came as a total surprise, I admit, because some reviews have been bad (why though...?). This is like watching an ortolan eating ceremony, angelic revenge and diabolical evil, dreamy sceneries come to life, as beautiful as it is scary ... Acting and casting is GREAT. I can´t remember the last time a fictional character actually made me feel uncomfortable. Michael the cop and his girlfriends father are only two good examples of what can be achieved with a great caster and a great director. Refn is a truly talented film artist, and I can only recommend you plan well, draw all curtains and prepare for long, dwelling and awe inspiring episodes. The episode format leaves you fumbling for "start now"-button, and is a great choice for this kind of storytelling. You don´t wanna miss this. Well done indeed.

Hanna (2019–2021)

Seriously, FIRE YOUR WRITERS!

[3/10 · 24 June 2019]

The first things I get served in episode 1 is "soldiers" who don´t know how to wear a beret or hold a weapon, and some constructed and completely ridiculous "radio communication" in a civil, commercial helicopter. In a chase scene (air chasing ground), the following ensues: A female agent of some sort occupying the non pilot seat in the cockpit, for no apparent reason takes "command" over some unseen weapon or shooter in the heli and says "Hold fire", and two seconds later, "fire" (they are already using deadly force, so it´s not a ROE thing) , whereas the unseen gun fires on the car (and misses). Why? What are you trying to tell me? That she is in charge? Of a gun operator in the heli, which by the way flies doors closed and is NOT equipped with an external weapon? So stupid. So incredibly dumb. Then, a male voice (also helicopter) says: "Gain elevation and sweep the area". Instead of spending time trying to explain why this is so utterly idiotic and embarrassing, suffice to say that NO ONE has ever said ANYTHING like ANY of the above. It is not how any ow this works. At all. If you know what I´m talking about, you are probably struggling not to facepalm yourself through the night, wanting only to erase this stupidity from your memory once and for all.

You spend all these resources on the scenes, even in the vulnerable first episode, and make NO effort to make sure the characters, sequences and lines at least appear with a MINIMUM of credibility? If this is representative for the rest of the writing, this is obviously nothing but a quagmire of frustration and irritation in stead of a thrilling adventure. FIRE YOUR WRITERS!

Bad Blood (2017–2018)

Season 2: impossible to take seriously

[3/10 · 13 June 2019]

So sad to see what they´ve done to season 2. They had every opportunity to make something good from the many possible angles from S1, but put NONE to use. There is a chaotic mix of storylines, branching left, right, up, down, diagonally, back, forth, spread out over a bunch of non essential characters suddenly popping up, establishing and introducing, establishing and introducing, again and again. It gives the impression of too many writers put to work, because here, they are unable to wrap up and stow away side characters as soon as they have nothing more to contribute to the storyline, which is often. It´s unprofessional, it waters out and drains the plot and goes nowhere. Worse; it´s boring and predictable, and the way the story is told goes totally overboard. For instance, the son of a side character who comes home from school where he has been in a fight. How to show this? By giving him absurdly bloody knuckles on the full hand, on all of them, like he just dipped them in intense color. Further, the main character and his sideshow retard nephew suddenly makes a ton of laughable, totally incomprehensible mistakes, like not being able to attach a strip of adhesive marker tape to a container, a VITAL detail in the plot. INstead sideshow clown basically just carelessly throws it on there, and because none of them cares to check (it´s right there in front of them), they hurry away from it. Guess what: tape goes with a perfectly timed gust of wind. Suspenseful music as it drifts away! Our man also ignores an obvious detail on a phone photo he takes to send to the antagonists who is chasing him, an interior detail that is clearly held out to the audience as a clue to where he might be. Him, the professional gangster? Oblivious. Then, he has a property out in the wilderness, which is attacked. The property has NONE security features, not even a sensor alarm on the perimeter, and is easily shot to pieces. Then our man discloses to retard nephew THE ONLY REASON he bought the house, according to himself: it has a secret tunnel. They escape through it, but guess what, it just leads to another OPEN FIELD about 150 metres from the house itself - and the tunnel, made for a crisis like this, doesn´t even contain a shotgun for self defense. They just pop out of the stupid little hatch in the open field, and for some reason, the badguys now empty mags after opening up on the house, can´t see the two, even across the open field, even if they´re moving and talking, even if the distance is no more than what a reasonnably good pistol shooter could hit his target. Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. The acting it self isn´t bad, with a couple of exeptions. but the two newcomer antagonists demonstrate a REMARKABLE patience with the underling family members they have come to instruct in a stone cold killer manner. Emphasis is on the woman as an ice queen fashionista, and her brother squints his way through the plot in a threatening way that never goes anywhere, all the way down to sitting at a breakfast table where he continues to argue with the not complying underlings, in his low and dangerous voice for the fourth day in a row, squinting in a threatening way. Seriously guys ... How could you throw the entire project away on pure bad writing and directing?? I am genuinely disappointed with this one.

The OA (2016–2019)

Why on earth? S2

[5/10 · 26 March 2019]

Part of me gives 10/10, but ... Introducing "mysterious" characters who "explain" to AO that she "must" do certain quests, like in a bad MMPORG, was a bad, bad idea. It´s realy obvious that this is nothing but turkey stuffing. Also the makers obviously has a puberty-like crush on facial expressions, pretty people, "exotic" accents and husky voices. I find it disrespectful towards both the audience and the project when the makers allow such mass produced and shallow elements into the story. And some over the top embarrasing scenes with dripping wet characters showing off their bodies ..... story dies right then and there. Maybe you just don´t bother paying your writers? If that is the case, it shows.

Billions (2016–2023)

Significantly worse

[1/10 · 25 March 2019]

In season 4, everyone is an extreme caricature of themselves. The polished, unlikely, overplayed mimicry, the mechanical punchline-based conversations and the hurried manner as if the writers have to finish a given number of scenes before being allowed to go to the toilet -- it´s nowhere near the previous quality. Dialogues, contexts, heartbeat - all gone. This is pure lazy writing and "let´s get this over with so we can go home"-mentality and openly communicated. You´ll only end up annoyed by this. Watch something else.

Budapest (2018)

Why make such elementary mistakes??

[2/10 · 8 March 2019]

It was promising until our heros got to Budapest. Here, the makers elected to insert one of the dumbest and most overused stuffings there is, one that seems to be irresistable to bad screenwriters wanting to fill gaps: The guy with a prostitute in his lap when his wife calls. In this movie, an enormous panic is triggered with the guy and his friend. What to do?? ANSWER, OF COURSE. In the nightclub. What follows is a Laurel and Hardy type slapstick where the wife back home demands a photo of the guy in the location he lied about going to, London. Friend says a dumb line about tea (because London etc) loudly in the background as the conversation is on. Arms and legs! Wild eyes! Oh my god, what to do! Seriously, this crap thinking is just top shelf annoying and makes ppl turn it off. As if the guy can´t just reject or ignore the call with a perfectly good excuse for doing so.

Nightflyers (2018)

As expected for the wide, wide crowd

[3/10 · 1 February 2019]

Someone once said "I don´t know the recipe for success, but I know the recipe for failure; try to please everyone".

Here, you have it all, in sync with the times we live in. Great emphasis is placed on the characters being good looking, always perfect makeup etc, and of course: black actors duly in prominent roles, including the ships captain. He comes across not as a captain at all, but some sort of enigmatic hermit who drops "profound" lines of "wisdom" whenever he shows himself not in person, but as a hologram (?).

Also, the system computers on board seem unable to activate life saving backup functions or the like whenever something dangerous happens, but in return, they SPEAK everything that happens, really clear, just like in Half-Life 2. Female voice: "Oxygen low", like ten times when a person is trapped in a water tank with diving breather and mask etc on (?), and then, maybe because the system hasn´t even been programmed to warn anyone else on the ship who could come the person in trouble to the rescue, it finally concludes "oxygen depleted". At least the person dying never has to doubt which way it´s all going. Etc.

One psychic antagonist is being kept in a cell on board, awaiting his mission which is to talk to some alien with telepathy. He is a cockney-ish brit with dark rings under his eyes and looks out on the world outside his cell in a scary way.

Some characters also seem susrprisingly un-vetted for the historys biggest space mission ever, being super sceptical towards it and the ship in general etc, and gets to complain openly about this, like they had no idea they were going here and doing this, without anyone raising a finger to stop their moral undermining rants.. The sceptical ones also say things like "We humans are earths disease / parasites and now looking for a new host to infect" bla bla bla.

Oh by the way, the ships mission is to find and explore some kind of alien secret to how the earth can be fixed and habitable again, on a mission that is meant to take two years or so. To do this, they don´t send a specialized team in a specialized craft or anything (guess it would´nt be much of a show if they did), but instead this gigantic station-like craft (the Nightflyer), complete with all the bells and whistles like huge bio habitats for palm trees etc, all run by a susrprisingly low number of crew. And yes, it rotates, at least after a near disastrous departure from just outside the earth atmosphere, where all it takes for the mission and spaceship to nearly go tits up is an engine faiure that threatens to send it into the earths atmosphere to friction-burn ... Again, no help from the advanced on board control computer. On the contrary; the "rebel" crew member on the bridge of the ship unbucles to selflessly and hazardously travel across the huge flight deck (Star Trek-ish), floating weightless of course, to get to an override system. This system is designed for emergencies like this, so maybe that´s the reason it aint placed anywhere near the controls, but under a trap door in the floor. Etc.

It´s all kind of polished and easily digestable, right down to some of the lead characters sentimental videolink chats with their loved ones back on earth.

You´ll probably enjoy this if you don´t expect originality or not before seen turns and twists.

Polar (I) (2019)

Mikkelsen: 10. The rest of them: 1.

[5/10 · 26 January 2019]

"Hey, let´s make this wild, "Sin City"-ish universe and see if we can get one of the worlds coolest actors to star in it - except we do this low low bugdet approach to large parts of the cast, and make the bad guys lame copies of the old "Kill Bill"-gang, and because they´re supposed to be really, really good hired thugs, we let them act so dumb, so clueless around weapons and gear (just throw in some terms, moves and hardware that looks cool although we have no clue what it is and how it should be used), and so unguided by consultants that any viewer over 11 years of age gets really, really frustrated and annoyed with how we succeed in wasting this perfectly good opportunity to do something for real cool!!"

They basically settled for getting Mikkelsen and the cool costumes. And that whining never ending end thing? God ....

Dunno if it´s the writers, the researcehsr or what, but all hands obviously went up in a vote FOR. Always great to see Mikkelsen and the weird and talented Matt Lucas, though.

Vikingane (2016–2020)

Written by 12 year olds

[1/10 · 20 November 2018]

No, this is NOT "Vikings with humor". This embarrasing attempt at being funny is a mashup of old jokes, farting, urinating and Benny Hill-inspired slapstick. Extremely unprofessional, insisting, overdone, it all ends up as an annoying soup of pure dumbness. Believe me, this is not worth your time.

Bodyguard (2018)

Completely ruins its potential

[2/10 · 5 November 2018]

It starts off promising, but already in the initial scenes, a totally misplaced agenda shines through: no less than THREE key operators in a special forces group are female. One of them black. Moderation and realism, anyone? Not in this show, no sir. Add elements such as the alleged weapons expert bodyguard doesn´t check his own ammo in the pistol clip, and thereby manages to fire a blank in a defining moment, followed later by a completely laughable scene in where he is knocked unconscious and strapped into a bomb vest and then held up by police / colleagues who all of a sudden doesn´t believe a word he´s saying about being forced to wear it because he omitted a piece of non vital information to them earlier, and the officer pointing a gun at him (why?) suddenly, after repeatedly requesting it over the radio (??) "gets a green light to shoot" our bomb vest wearing heroon the spot (?????), WHICH THE OFFICER IN QUESTION THEN CHOOSES NOT TO DO, DESPITE HIS OWN DESPERATE REQUEST TO DO SO, and while fearing of our hero detonating his vest (hence the neeed to shoot him point blank, even hough he is wearing a dead man trigger and therefore would kill all his sceptical and trigger happy colleagues if taken down), THEY ALLOW HIS EX WIFE TO WALK UP TO HIM TO TALK SENSE. In short: lazy, amateurish, zero consultants or research (or they´ve just chosen to ignore the advice completely), and all in all a perfectly wasted opportunity to make a decent thriller. Well done ...

Accident Man (2018)

Well below ANYONEs standards

[1/10 · 31 March 2018]

I dare say that most -- if not all -- positive reviews of this embarrasing excuse for a movie is fake. This is one of the worst action movie attempts I´ve ever seen. If it had even the slightest taste of something funny -- it doesn´t -- it could MAYBE pass as a clumsy attempt on a parody over Rock ´n Rolla. It´s beyond me how anyone can put their name on this travesty. Trust me, you do NOT want to waste your time (and certainly not money) on this BS.

Altered Carbon (2018–2020)

Totally laughable flaws

[6 February 2018]

Example: S1Ep9. Elliot, the black guy, gets a critical role in the execution of what is maybe the most important operation of the entire series. His characters choice: ignore everything they have agreed on, time critical aspect included, and instead spending a lot of precious time being a concerned citizen towards the prostitute they have set him up with, delivering some puke-trigging stupidity like "You´ll never have to do this again" etc. Then, being a luxury snuff escort in the universes absolute top brothel, she immediately has a babbling meltdown and starts whining about "did I do it right?" etc even before anything have happened. Elliots job is to put her to sleep, just that, but instead of simply spraying her with some magic maze or something like that, he has brought a sedative to use in a drink (!), even if ha can´t possibly know beforehand if there would be anything to drink or if she would accept the offer at all. Then, it turns out Tak is waiting in the trunk of the car in the parking facility. Because he accidentally slams his hand into the trunk and makes noise, the guards immediately is on to him. THEN, all he has to do is penetrate his own skin with the Reaper knife, later explaining that the sedative it contains is all it takes to "lower his body temp", the temperature problem being the main reason for the entire overly complicated infil operation, Elliot even set up with an elaborate fake identity as a general to get in. Wouldn´t they just KNOW that there would be a way to mask the body temperature and use the magic stuff from the knife, or something like that, in the first place?? The entire operation, paramount to the story, is entirely used to give the Elliot-actor screentime - in the worst possible way. This unprofessional storytelling, which can be seen in various parts of the story, ruins everything and effectively takes down the illusion for me. What a waste.

Hickok (2017)

Uterly embarrasing

[30 January 2018]

Lazy, terrible script, one dimentional characters, flat and boring. Exactly the same kind of stupidity yyou find in series like CSI and similar garbage.

Singularity (I) (2017)

Shocking and embarrassing

[26 January 2018]

I can´t believe my cable movie rental actually charged me for this. I feel robbed. This repulsive and utterly stupid "movie" is exactly what supporters of piracy needs; proof that the industry is urinating on the audience. ANY upvote of this travesty is fake. Guaranteed.

Vengeance: A Love Story (2017)

Seriously?

[1/10 · 6 January 2018]

Thanks for wasting my time and money - this garbage could be made by any 12 year old with a budget. Could easily be viewed as a parody over itself. Don´t bother, it´s not worth the frustration.

T2 Trainspotting (2017)

I loved every minute of it

[8/10 · 27 May 2017]

For once I am in total disagreement with my fellow users here. T2 is a beautifully executed nostalgic sequel. It combines the nostalgia with the chaotic dynamics from the first, and the man characters come fully alive as their older selves. Both thumbs up, job well done. I had a GREAT time.