robbinsm-99385 Reviews

Reacher (2022– )

Enjoyable, But Lacks Immersion

[6/10 · 27 December 2023]

The show is fun for people who like when the lead actor is tougher than everyone else he comes in contact with so we can live vicariously through them and feel like the hero. It's the same appeal as being the powerful character in a video game or something. We do root for him.

However, the acting is very bad. People remarking on the acting being a highlight have only been watching soap operas their entire life. Alan Ritchson says his lines like he has practiced them 100 times until they became mechanical and completely unconvincing. None of the actors are particularly great, but I've literally cringed at some of these interactions. Some of the "detective work" is just them making observations the audience can make for themselves. They're supposed to be some of the brightest special investigators out there and they still insist on forcing interactions between them so that the audience keeps up. The writers just insist on approaching everything as ham-fisted as possible because the storyline is SO difficult to keep up with (not). Like okay, Dory the Explorer. Thanks for the hand-holding.

The set pieces are also hilarious. For example, are we really supposed to be convinced that cinder blocks can be picked up like a feather? They didn't even try to make the props realistic lol. I'm not even close to a nose-up cinema critic, and even I couldn't get on board with all that.

All that to say, It's fun to watch when you're bored. Just don't expect it to be Yellowstone or GoT-tier acting. Maybe Ritchson is better off as a comedy actor.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (2023 Video Game)

Rose Colored Glasses

[6/10 · 6 July 2023]

I'll keep this short and sweet: the game is good. People saying this is some innovative masterpiece don't have a clue what they're talking about.

TotK was originally DLC for BotW before they realized they had enough content to make a new title. That's fair and all, but that's exactly how this game plays and what it feels like: BotW 1.5. If you never beat BotW, then maybe this won't feel so trying. If you DID beat BotW, playing TotK can feel more like a chore than a world worth exploring... because you already explored it.

There are 2 things that are different: Crafting/Fusing and Sky Islands/Underworld. Crafting is fine, but tedious, and other games have similar mechanics that work way more efficiently. Sky islands are intriguing initially but feels a little undercooked and barely warranted the new Zelda title. The underworld is just the reverse of the mainland, and it's daunting at first, until you realize it's actually boring to explore and takes up the entire size of the original game. There's so much fat they could have trimmed. Seriously.

The story is more immersive than BotW, I'll give it that for sure. Enemies are harder imo, but the game just doesnt play as well and the controls are more counterintuitive than ever before, effectively providing more challenge than the enemies do. Maybe it's a skill issue, I'm open to that, but I've played games my whole life and I've never gotten entirely comfortable playing TotK. It barely runs at 30 fps half the time which is just insane in 2023.

It sounds like I'm harping on it, but it's just not a perfect game. It doesn't feel as dense and whole as BotW did, and it feels like something crucial is missing; like it's lacking heart and soul.

If this was any other game it would receive okay to decent reviews, but because it's Zelda everyone votes it as a 10. Just take the rose colored glasses off before you play the game.

High on Life (2022 Video Game)

Not Good or Bad, Just Different

[6/10 · 23 December 2022]

First off, if you are not a fan of Rick and Morty or Solar Opposites, stay away from this game. The humor is exactly what you'd expect from Roiland.

The premise: I'm sure most of you have looked into this already, but the game is about an Alien race finding Earth and discovering that humans give them an incredible high. You team up with a talking gun named Kenny (voiced by Roiland) to travel to a different planet and explore, fight bosses, find new weapons with different personalities, and visit new places with the help of a washed-up bounty hunter and his gadgets. So let's get into this.

Pros: Humor, Graphics, Dialogue, Exploration, and Boss Sequences.

Roland's humor is littered throughout this game and it never quits. It's very entertaining and scratches just about every humor type there is. The graphics are pretty good given it isn't some triple A title, and I didn't experience *too* many glitches, aside from some dead body shivering and finding some places that I couldn't come back from that forced me to restart checkpoints. The dialogue is entertaining and fruitful, it rewards exploration (although not initially), and the boss fights were fairly well-thought-out and offered some challenge in an otherwise easy game.

Cons: Humor, Longevity, and Mechanics/Button Layout, Music

Yes, the humor is both a pro and a con. I find the humor in this game entertaining up until the moment I don't, and then I can't do it anymore. It's important to note that you can turn off the frequency of dialogue in the settings, but it's crazy that it's even an option. It's as if THEY knew it was too much and just put a filter setting in the game instead of loosening up on all the repetitive word vomit from the get-go. They even have a character in the game whose sole purpose is to annoy you; while I can respect how much they lean into their self-awareness, I would have appreciated more substance to counter the incessant stimulation. I had to take frequent breaks from this game as I usually couldn't play it for more than 45 minutes at a time, not due to the stimulation per se, but predominately due to its glaring contrivance.

It's a shorter game, but I question its ability to maintain relevancy outside the 8 hours you dedicate to it. I would not buy this game for full price personally, but if you find it on Game Pass then there's really no downside to downloading it.

The game mechanics are slow in my opinion, and the button layout is odd. I would find myself rarely using stronger attacks because it didn't feel particularly satisfying or all that necessary. The fighting is fine, but lackluster.. and the music is fun at first but gets old a few hours in. Avid gamers will definitely notice the wonkiness, but a casual gamer would barely notice.

Overall I think people should try it out for themselves, but if you have other games you're dying to play first then I'd leave it on the backburner.

Halo Infinite (2021 Video Game)

Game is alright, but no spark

[6/10 · 9 December 2021]

Nah fam. You're releasing a half-baked game and expecting people to enjoy the experience? It's fine.. campaign is well-thought out. But the multiplayer makes this game unenjoyable. You cant pick the game type you want to play? Seriously? That's bare minimum, guys.

Back 4 Blood (2021 Video Game)

It's about what you'd expect

[6/10 · 14 October 2021]

Back 4 Blood is basically what you expect it to be.. it's Left 4 Dead with better graphics (aside from a few questionable glitches).

The only issue is that Left 4 Dead has something that B4B does not: heart. It's something that many games suffer from nowadays and is almost impossible to pinpoint. It's not that the game doesn't have neat features to explore, but it lacks that spark that keeps you coming back.

Maybe this is a genre that belongs in the past when people actually had friends over to play video games. Playing this alone or with friends online just leaves something to be desired.. and I don't think it's the devs fault.

Slender Man (I) (2018)

Let me guess, everyone is gonna hate on it

[6/10 · 10 August 2018]

Take it for what it is. You are watching a movie based off of a scary-fun character out of a game. Is it innovative? No. But it's not the "worst movie ever" like everyone loves to say about horror flicks nowadays. Go into it ready for some jump scares.. that's literally the game!

Now, with that being said, the most notable negatives are character development and the the frequency of Slender Man. When I got out of the theater I couldn't even remember the characters names. The only one I could remember was Wren who was the worst and best character in the film simulatenously. Also, they made slenderman out to be summoned and whatnot, like The Ring, which in my opinion was a lost opportunity. I feel having Slender Man just exist out there in the world and prey on unsuspecting victims would be more intriguing. Because of this lack of origin, it sort of had me going, "so wait.. where did he even come from then?"

Some of the acting was straight up cringeworthy, and some of the jump scares were completely unnecessary. The beauty of Slender Man is your ability to hear nothing but your footsteps on the leaves. The dead silence is what's terrifying. If any movie needed more silence, it would be this movie. Also, if any movie needed unexpected Slender Man placements, It would be this movie. Everytime he shows up, you know it's coming, and this totally defeats the purpose of this character!! Not knowing when or where he's going to appear is the beauty of the game to begin with!

All that to say, I had some fun with it.. there are some notably uncomfortable moments that'll stick with me for a long to come, and open-minded viewers will probably agree to this. Just go in without your movie critic hat on. No one goes a day without that thing anymore.