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Reviews
Chaos Walking (2021)
Drown a dog for dramatic effect?
Really?
Yep.
Cheap, or what!
I'd love to say this movie had some redeeming features but even the haircuts were poor.
It's odd how a potentially very original premise gets reduced to a flat, a-typical, cinematic cliche. This also reflects across the performances as it's clear there's something going on that has rendered often dynamic actors utterly bewildered and inert. I cannot blame them for this is one truly unholy mess.
This is like the very worst TV pilot. Everything is made of wood (actors and metal objects included). You rapidly become irritated by the one unremitting special effect and by the time you've got the shape and feel of the universe they've created you'll find yourself spend the remaining 100 minutes amazed at why you're still there.
Avoid.
Dune (2021)
A very long perfume commercial
This movies adds precisely nothing to the legacy of David Lynch's earlier unintentionally flawed adaptation and goes so far as to indulge itself in overt wholesale stylistic plagiarism. You owe your life more than the two and a half hours you'll devote to this empty promise. Avoid.
Resident Evil (2022)
Riverdale with Zombies is not Resident Evil
They almost had me for the first few episodes of this debacle... adopted teen sisters reveal the dark truth behind their fathers corporate position working for the infamous Umbrella corporation. However... it soon collapses into a domino chain of sub-par, poorly executed, hackneyed, stereotypical obvious tropes... just like the previous other Resident Evil Constantin / Anderson productions.
The Resident Evil franchise in the right hands has the potential to be intelligent, intriguing and action packed. This time around? Not so much.
Kindred (2020)
Cliché Domino Chain
No amount of praise-worthy performance (and there's plenty to be had here) can eclipse the simple fact that this technically competent work completely fails to escape its own narrative drudgery. The aesthetic of the production held me to the finish which, in the end, made me dislike it even more as, in hindsight, I found myself wishing it had been a genuinely obvious howler so I could have seen the signs good and early, saved myself an hour and a half and simply walked out at the start.