hawkknight88-1 Reviews

2000 Mules (2022)

Misleading film made by known grifter and felon

[2/10 · 25 May 2022]

This film is based on research by True the Vote, conservative 'vote-monitoring organization' based in Houston, Texas.

Even if the events it shows occurred, every absentee ballot deposited in a drop box must be inside an envelope sent to each registered voter that includes the voter's registration information, signature, and a barcode for verification. Ballots lacking the envelope are rejected. True the Vote never asserted any of the ballots involved in the alleged mule scheme were illegal.

Look - if any of this were true or actually illegal, we'd hear about it in court. America actually does have a justice system, and there isn't some worldwide conspiracy to stop Donald Trump from being reelected.

And the final kicker? In 2014, D'Souza pleaded guilty to one felony count of making illegal contributions in the names of others.

The Lion King (2019)

Didn't need to be made

[5/10 · 4 November 2021]

Of course I have my childhood nostalgia but I do believe the original was better. I just don't get why this needed to be made. It wasn't awful; it just didn't bring anything to the table.

The worst part was the awful rewrite of "Be Prepared" that's probably my favorite villain song of all time.

Fisher (2021)

It was mediocre

[6/10 · 1 November 2021]

This was clearly a low budget or indie movie. I stumbled across it because it has such high rating (which seem to be friends/family?) The movie was just not that good. There was some pretty mediocre acting and the ending 'twist' was incredibly obvious. We knew the religious kid was acting shady the entire film. We know he's tall. We know the mom is really short. The moment he got in the van with his mom after hitting the 'bathroom' with liquid on his shirt I turn to my wife and say "he cut her brakes and the boyfriend in the back seat is just to try and throw us off".

It has some cool shots and I appreciate that lots of clues were dropped (ie the writing was not poor). But this was fairly sub par flick. Also we never fully got to see what happened to Kim besides some bloody glasses.

The Social Dilemma (2020)

Scarily accurate

[9/10 · 15 July 2021]

Sure the acting parts are in-your-face fearmongering, but all of the interviews with tech leaders are accurate. We are being treated as a commodity to be bought and sold to the highest bidder. Our world is being changed by social media, for better and worse.

I wonder if any of us even understand how much screen-time we have in a day? Myself included!

Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021)

Confusing and nonsencial, but pretty

[5/10 · 22 March 2021]

The CGI is good. Steppenwolf is cool. I could take Superman seriously, and the Flash provided some reasonable comic relief. I get the feeling this movie just wasn't for me, and it was some fan-service for people who know the DC fluff really well.

I actually saw the Justice League in theaters and couldn't remember who the bad guy was until I saw Steppenwolf on-screen again. And he's just 'cliche bad guy' who wants to conquer Earth so that he can get on Darkseid's good side (heh heh). Kind of a shallow villain, IMO.

It's on for far too long, there's some glaring plot holes and there's a ridiculous number of slow motion scenes. Lots of cheesy one liners and too much overly dramatic music. Their budget for 'fans that blow the characters' hair dramatically' was probably in the millions. We actually laughed out loud when Aquaman left town and the town's women sang some dirge and then one lady sniffed Aquaman's discarded sweater. Isn't it weird that every time the Atlanteans talk underwater they make an air bubble to do it? Isn't it weird that some mythical black arrow was shot directly to a Greek temple, and was also the key for a room downstairs? Who was the girl in the car that the Flash saved, and then we never saw her again? Why was Lex Luthor even in the movie, besides the cliffhanger? What was that epilogue in some other universe? Why is Alfred a genius mechanic?

The most fun we had with it was talking about it as it went on, for way way way too long.

Wheel of Fortune (1983– )

Same great show with needless extras

[6/10 · 5 March 2021]

I watched Wheel and Jeopardy with my parents as a kid most weeknights. It's a fine show, and it's fun to play. What I don't love is the new "America's game" branding and Pat+Vanna touring America. In my opinion it's needless exposition and fluff.

The American Barbecue Showdown (2020– )

Manufactured Drama

[6/10 · 21 December 2020]

It's a barbecue competition. I'm here to look at interesting people making tasty food. I'm _not_ here to hear sob stories, or hear judges say "I don't know if she can recover from this". It's fake, and it pulls me out of my immersion. I don't know why every show needs to be reality TV now.

The judges were a little humiliating to Shotgun - and we're in episode 1 here. They called him up to taste his own food, and judge lady held up his asparagus like she was personally insulted.

Blood Beat (1983 Video)

Really not great

[4/10 · 2 December 2020]

The film is confusing. Most other reviews seem to agree there's a big 'wtf' element about the whole thing. But the acting is really poor. There's amateur continuity changes between scenes, or some scenes are very short, then others are awkwardly long. The animations are what they are - low budget, but they tried.

Spoilers...?

The mom is psychic, and so is her son's girlfriend? Her son's girlfriend finds some random chest with samurai armor then becomes possessed (in sexual fits) and murders people as the samurai spirit? It's so odd - and you can tell from all of the question marks that I'm not even sure what happened.

I kind of feel like I wasted my time. But I also like bizarre movies usually.

John Dies at the End (2012)

Not the best realization of the book

[6/10 · 12 April 2020]

It's very common for movies to take creative liberties with the source material, because they're strapped for time. That said.. The movie is fun, but it would have to be incredibly confusing if I hadn't read the book first. It's a very fractured plot, with important pieces missing and others jammed together for the sake of time.

There's also those annoying changes that are just entirely unnecessary. Amy is a redhead - the book says it so many times. And for no reason, in the movie, she's a brunette.

Is definitely watch it, but you should probably read the book first.

Silent Hill: Revelation (2012)

It wasn't awful

[5/10 · 18 January 2020]

There are a lot of fun moments and effects in the movie. The story is very poor, and the acting is pretty bad in a few spots like when SPOILER Heather meets Alessia (and hugs her to death?). Just some truly random plot points like Sean Bean deciding to stay at the end. And oooOOOooOOooo some fog reappears right before the credits.

I don't know. It kind of feels like a teenager's idea of what is creepy instead of being legitimately horrifying. The enjoyment I got from it was some of the effects because it reminded me of Hellraiser, and the first film.

Suspiria (I) (2018)

I stopped watching

[1/10 · 9 May 2019]

I _rarely_ shut off movies without finishing them. I got about an hour in, and then turned it off. It was just pretty boring. I didn't find it to be a "slow burn", I found the dialog to be a confusing maze.

Hellraiser: Judgment (2018 Video)

Enjoyable with a disappointing ending

[6/10 · 6 May 2019]

I actually really enjoyed most of the movie. It's kind of Se7en meets Hellraiser. But it feels like the writing got hazy at the end with what the film was supposed to be. And it was just too corny and unbelievable for me.

The new Pinhead actor was good. Sure, not Doug Bradley, but he did a great job. I really advise Hellraiser fans to be less dogmatic about their fandom. You might like this film!

Dead House (2014)

Practical effects the only redeeming quality

[2/10 · 17 March 2019]

Just awful. There is so little story, besides kinda sorta the bad guys think they're "giving it to the man" by raping and murdering (rich?) families.

The story becomes completely incoherent about 2/3 of the way through when the zombies get out. Inexplicably the father injects himself and becomes a weird zombie because... He's a coward?

The good brother decides to randomly become evil and rape/murder the mom he was escaping with.

The mom forgets she wants to save her kids between scenes then remembers later.

How did the neighbor's turn to zombies so quickly? How did it become daylight when it should have, maybe, been midnight?

Just a lot of "shock" value with no substance for explanation.

Into the Dark: Down (2019) Season 1, Episode 5

Solidly mediocre

[5/10 · 10 February 2019]

The main woman made so many dumb decisions. I actually yelled at the TV twice because she kept being such a dimwit. It's a shame because the film is otherwise okay.

When will horror/thrillers learn that characters can be smart and the movie can still be compelling?

** Spoilers ** She's trapped in the elevator with a psycho and she proceeds to threaten him before she gets out?? Does nobody question the director?

At least the ending was better than I thought it'd be.

Malevolent (III) (2018)

Disappointing.

[4/10 · 7 January 2019]

It was a decent plot. Acting was great. I thought the cinematography was impressive.

But the absolute idiocy of the characters later in the movie is just too frustrating. They move slowly, and they make illogical decisions. I thought the ending was really lackluster. And the use of jump scares a few times came off as cheap.

Curse of Chucky (2013)

A pretty good return to the franchise

[7/10 · 15 July 2018]

Definitely a fun movie, and there's tons of fan-service for those who have seen all of the originals before this one. I think the early film was pretty weak, and I was prepared to rate the title really poorly until nearer to the end where the film gets a bit smarter. The 'horror' parts were really cliche in my opinion, with some poor acting, particularly from the two women having an affair. The the mother, Barb, was just unlikable. I'm not particularly fond of how the doll was changed, either, though he returns to form as the film progresses I guess.

Definitely worth seeing, but the first half could have been much stronger.