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tarasuffolk
Reviews
Beauty and the Beast (2017)
Was it necessary? No. Was it pretty good? Yes
Yeah this movie didn't need to be made but Disney doesn't care. They're gonna do as many live action movies as they can and we can't stop them.
You know the plot.
Anyway, I'll list the things I didn't like because I liked more things: 1. Emma Watson's singing voice. It was weak and lacked passion. 2. The 'gay' moment. It was small and not gay enough. Le Fou, a notable buffoon, gay? Kind of silly. Disney should spend their time making original characters who are gay. 3. They didn't include the song 'Home' from the Broadway show. This would have been okay if they didn't include the music for that song.
I loved a lot of things. I loved the movie. I was really surprised considering the live action Cinderella was kind of dumb.
Things I LOVED: 1. The song 'Evermore' 2. How they explained Belle's mother absence (both the explanation and the scene). 3. Josh Gad 4. The added characteristics for Belle and the Beast.
I liked everything else.
So before you bash this movie because Disney's greed to make more money, watch it.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Where the Wild Things Are (2000)
Kind of dumb
I'm watching this show for the first time ever and only a couple of episodes have made me go 'What the hell was that?'. Surprise this is one of them!
Buffy and Riley are having lots of sex and that angers the house in which they're doing it in. The house, before it was a frat house, was an orphanage (or something) run by an uptight lady who punished the children when they were dirty (sexually). So the repressed children come back to house as poltergeists and they do very weird things. I mean, there's literally a scene where a bunch of people are touching a wall because it gave them orgasms.
Yeah that's the plot. It made me slightly uncomfortable. I mean, why can't Buffy have sex with someone without dangerous consequences? It just seems unfair.
I would add more but I don't want to think about this episode anymore
The Secret Life of Pets (2016)
The voice actors carried this movie
Overall this movie was okay. I had no idea what the plot was going into this movie. And I still don't truth be told. The trailers made it seem like the pets did wacky stuff while their owners are away, secret stuff. Instead it was kind of like Toy Story where jealously leads to wacky adventures.
I'm 22 years old. I LOVE animated movies and television shows targeted at children. But I didn't like this one too much.
The good things: The voice actors. Louis C.K. did an amazing job. He talked like he was a dog if that makes sense. I did even know that it was Eric Stonestreet. I like the voice he used. Kevin Hart did a good job too, he put as much intensity as I'm sure he puts into his stand-up, Jenny Slate, Ellie Kemper, Albert Brooks, Lake Bell, and Dana Carvey did amazing as well. Overall the voice acting was top notch.
The animation was bright and colorful. That's pretty important for animated movies for children. It made New York look nice and friendly.
There's a point where we find out that the Eric Stonestreet dog (Duke) had a previous owner and that scene is lovely. So Max and Duke somehow find the house and of course the previous owner died and that scene is nice.
The dog who's played by Bobby Moyniham, Mel, was my favorite. He was so cute and hyperactive. He made me laugh.
The score was interesting. It was kind of jazzy, I liked it a lot.
The bad things: The plot. It was kind of all over the place. I had no idea where it was going. First thing that happens is that Max (Louis C.K. dog)'s owner gets a new dog (Eric Stonestreet), Duke. Max is mean to him and the new dog is mean right back. Hijinks ensue as they compete for love and alpha status. Eventually Max wins and the new dog has to do what Max says for a bit. Then as they go to the park, the new dog pulls an asshole move and tries to get rid of Max. Haha kids movies amiright? The plot falls apart there. They run into crazy feral cats, then pound people, then animals that live in the SEWER because they were abandoned, then a weenie factory, and then sewer and feral cats again. The plot changes every 10 minutes to keep attention spans from running out I guess.
The weenie factory scene. It was bizarre and it made me uncomfortable. Max and Duke eat so many that they imagine the weenies singing 'You're the One that I Want!' from Grease. Or maybe it actually happened. I don't know. That scene didn't really make any sense to me.
About 25 minutes in, the bunny that Kevin Hart plays drives the city pound truck. Quite honestly that's where the movie lost me. I can disband my belief for talking animals but when they drive machinery is when it looses me.
The dog that Jenny Slate plays, Gidget, has a crush on Max and spends the whole movie trying to rescue him. The crush bothers me because it doesn't explain why or how she has a crush on him. She just does, no backstory. In order to save/rescue someone, apparently you need to have romantic feelings for them.
Most of the movie apparently takes place in one day. I don't buy it.
And last thing, there's so many characters. Max and his friends, Kevin Hart bunny and his gang of misfits, Gidget and her rescuing crew, the feral cats are just some characters. This isn't even mentioning all the human characters. It was too much, I can't handle it.
Anyway, if I was under 10 years old I would probably like it. But I didn't it and it makes me sad.
6/10.