kpassa Reviews

The Walking Dead: The Ones Who Live (2024)

Oh My, That Was Really Dumb

[2/10 · 19 April 2024]

I realize that this was originally based on a comic so I guess I shouldn't be surprised that it turned out to be comical. It started out well enough, filling in the gaps between when Rick got taken away by Jadis after the bridge explosion, Michone's hunt for him and the shows present day, but it quickly devolved from that point onward. Amazing coincidences, spectacular escapes, superhero-like fighting skills, the ability to absorb incredible amounts of punishment and still come out on top, improbable alliances, this show had it all in spades. You can only believe so much until it starts looking like you ended up in clown world. What a sad end to a series that was so special.

The Marlow Murder Club (2024– )

One Of The Stupidest Ever

[1/10 · 5 April 2024]

We watch a lot of mysteries, and I mean a LOT. We watch a different mystery every night, and we've been doing it for many years. We currently have 46 different shows and I've lost track of how many complete ones we have already seen, such as Broadchurch, Morse, Lynley, Baptiste, Prime Suspect, Marple, you get the idea. So when I say I know the difference between a good mystery and a bad one I mean it. This is one of the worst I've ever had the displeasure of sitting through. The stupid in this one really ran deep. Examples:

Believing that a WW2 pistol, along with 80 year old ammunition, would be sold at an auction house in a country with strict gun control laws.

Not only knowing the exact spot to look for a clue that is under water but then throwing in your little magnet and pulling it up on the first try.

Announcing with an important-sounding voice to an intruder and possible murder suspect that you are making a citizen's arrest and coming out of that in one piece.

Having a group of local busybodies walk into an establishment wanting to talk to the owner, getting laughed at then having everything turn serious when they flash their little club cards and announce that actually, this is a police matter then not get laughed at even more.

Having a dog that, in the past, all you have ever done is take for walks and on your command have it smash through a window and go straight for the bad guy's gun hand just like a trained K9.

You get the idea. Not only was the acting bad, the plot was ridiculous and the ending beggared belief. The only saving grace is that it was just 2 parts so I know never to bother getting this drivel again in the future.

The Truth About Jim (2024)

How Could Something This Stupid...

[1/10 · 27 February 2024]

I actually watched all 4 episodes of this, just to see how this girl could make the leaps of logic necessary to tie a hated relative to a series of unsolved murders. It wasn't pretty but still it was fascinating to see how far hatred could drive someone to dedicate so much time to impugn the reputation of a dead relative. It's kind of sad to see people so traumatized that they could make this documentary, but here we are. Yet that still doesn't answer the question of management at HBO and how somebody could be so stupid as to approve this trash? Well, if you think about it, no matter how gullible you think people are, they will exceed your expectations. For example, a show about treasure concealed on an island has been running for years without a scrap of treasure found, yet audiences still lap it up. So my theory is that HBO knew that no matter how stupid it was, they would find an audience. After all, they have time slots to fill. Odds are, they were right.

Anatomy of a Fall (2023)

What A Waste Of Time!!

[2/10 · 25 January 2024]

I watched this because it was nominated for Best Picture. They scoured the world and this was the best they could come up with? It would have been fine if it was made to be shown in a law school as an example of how a trial develops, but other than that there was no compelling reason to watch it. I kept waiting and waiting for the boy to play some significant role in the movie and boy, what an anticlimax that turned out to be. Unlike a mystery or a thriller there were no plot twists to speak of, no gotcha moments and no ending that left you doing anything other than shaking your head and wondering what just happened to the las 2+ hours of your life.

A Murder at the End of the World (2023)

Darby's Dose

[2/10 · 23 December 2023]

I started watching this series because a reviewer for a major newspaper had it on the list of best New shows of 2023. I guess he must have been drunk at the time because this series is terrible. The premise, a girl who has a knack for solving mysteries and an interest in Jane Doe cases, is on track to find a serial killer when she gets sidetracked by an offer from the world's richest man to attend a forum in Iceland. There, another murder occurs, only this time it's her ex boyfriend. The rest of the series revolves around flashbacks of her and the ex and trying to figure out the current killer. At least the ex had the good sense to die so he wouldn't have to be a part of this boring mess. The only redeeming part of this show was the scenery.

In the 1700's a disgusting, horrific form of torture known as Derbys Dose became infamous and is still talked about hundreds of years later. Darby's Dose isn't as horrific as the original but it is still a torture to sit through, something I wouldn't wish on anyone. Avoid this.

Boiling Point (2023– )

Couldn't Finish It

[1/10 · 21 October 2023]

We have categories of shows we like to watch (Detective mysteries, travel shows, cooking shows, etc) then we watch other shows because they have an actor in them that we like. We chose this story because of Stephen Graham. Watching the first episode was a struggle akin to watching paint dry and we only made it partway into the second episode before we couldn't take it anymore and shut it off. In theory it should have worked but some of the ideas were so stupid that it made the show unwatchable. The head chef walking out to check on her mother in the middle of the dinner rush? A new chef with 0 experience who didn't even get a tryout before being hired, even if it was through an agency? I guess the supposed technical triumph is that it was done in one or two takes. It should have been shelved. That would have been its real triumph.

As Luck Would Have It (2023– )

Makes Hallmark Mysteries Look Oscar Worthy

[1/10 · 24 September 2023]

My wife and I watch a mystery every night. It's something we've been doing for years, which means that I always have to be on the lookout for new material. This seemed to fit the bill nicely: a retired criminology professor turned Podcaster solves mysteries as a sideline, much to the disgust of her police detective daughter. Yes, it's a well worn plot device but with a few good actors they can usually manage to pull it off, or at least make it bearable. Not this time. Stereotypical meddlesome mama, amazingly obnoxious daughter with the hapless partner caught in the middle. The acting is terrible , so bad it makes you want to root for the bad guys. The last time I watched something this bad it was a Hallmark mystery, and I deleted all of them. This makes me want to bring them back just to improve the quality of our TV time.

The Good Stuff with Mary Berg (2023– )

Stick With Cooking Shows, Mary

[1/10 · 9 September 2023]

I really enjoy watching Mary cook. I have every episode of Mary Makes It Easy so when I found out about a new show with a food sounding name I had to give it a look. Big mistake. A Canadian Jeopardy champion? A kid who never sees the sunshine because he is glued to his computer (true, something good came from it but how many kids fritter their time away with nothing to show for it except pasty skin?)? Who cares? She did start off with a cooking demonstration but that wasn't enough to make me put up with all of the other filler. Since I live in an area which doesn't allow us to watch her show live I downloaded episode 1. I won't waste bandwidth downloading episode 2. Her opening recipe was chicken. It should have been turkey to match the theme of her show. Oh, and by the way, she also tries to sell overpriced junk. Why, Mary, why? Stick with cooking.

Dancing Queens (2023– )

First World Problems

[8/10 · 14 July 2023]

This series follows the fortunes of a group of amateur ballroom dancers who pair up with professionals to compete in a series of competitions, looking only for glory and a small trophy. The time, effort and money involved in these vanity projects is staggering but these women are willing to make the sacrifice. We actually enjoyed following the storyline of the different characters. Like any good soap opera there were heroes, villains and tales to tug at your heartstrings but in the end it was just a group with first world problems and tons of money to throw at them. I would be surprised if there was a season 2 but I didn't feel like we wasted our time watching this one season.

Cross Country Cake Off (2022– )

Mary Makes It Woke

[1/10 · 8 July 2023]

I love watching all types of cooking shows, from MasterChef to the Great British Bake Off. I have all seasons of Mary Makes It Easy, so when I found out that she was hosting a baking competition I was stoked.

The very first contestant on the first episode spent more time talking about his husband and the LGBTQ community than his cake. The co host said that his cake was an inspiration to the younger members of the LGBTQ community and Mary chimed in about how his inspiration to the community was totally awesome, at which point I turned it off.

I turned on the series to watch people bake cakes, not a course in social engineering. It has nothing at all to do with the LGBTQ community because you can't watch a cooking or baking show without at least one contestant mentioning their same sex partner. That's just a box you expect to be ticked. But spouses get mentioned like any other spouse or significant other, just as a quick point of biographical info. You don't get a lecture to go along with it. I choose cooking over lectures every time. There are too many alternatives to waste time on this. Bye, Mary. You made it easy for me to skip this series.

Count Abdulla (2023)

Wow, this was really bad

[1/10 · 27 June 2023]

I watched the entire series before reviewing just to make sure I wasn't missing something good but in the end all I did was waste my time. No good storyline, no real comedy, no big plot twists, and on top of it all it was grossly bigoted and insulting. Just imagine how it would have been received if a bunch of white characters had made so many slurs about brown people, thrown someone out of a party for dressing as a native or stereotyping people even half as much as they constantly did in this series. Not only would it not made it to production, a lot of writers would be fired and probably prevented from ever working again. But apparently in some circles it's okay to trash people as long as they are in the right group. It might have made some people laugh but it won't work in the long run.

Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)

Couldn't Finish It

[2/10 · 28 February 2023]

I watched, or at least tried to watch, this movie after reading about all of the SAG awards it received and all of the Academy Award buzz. Big mistake. Right off the bat the dialog was unintelligible. The Chinese parts with subtitles was the easiest for me to follow but the rest was a mess. Because I couldn't understand half of what was being said that made the plot almost impossible to follow. I made it most of the way through all of the action in the IRS building when the daughter and her pig showed up then it just got to be too much. I decided that I had wasted enough of my time and gave up on it. All it did was remind me of what a waste of time it is to listen to anything the SAG or Academy Award people have to say.

Life After People (2009–2010)

Gets Boring Quickly

[5/10 · 26 February 2023]

An interesting concept of how the earth would look if all humans disappeared and the planet went back to its natural state, unimpeded by the modifications of man. It quickly went from very interesting to mildly interesting to boring and repetitive to not even worth finishing. It only took a couple of episodes to get it: internal systems fail, buildings start to break down, nature creeps back in, once mighty structures crumble, etcetera etcetera and so on until not a trace of man's existence remains. The first time it was a great watch but then every other episode was variations on a theme. We didn't even bother watching the last few episodes and skipped series 2 altogether.

Last Light (2022)

Eco Fantasy Claptrap

[1/10 · 19 February 2023]

When I started watching this series I thought it was supposed to be a drama about thwarting a plot to destroy the world's energy supply. Instead we were "treated" to a ridiculous fantasy where eco fanatics weren't really trying to bring us back into the stone age. No, they were trying to save us from ourselves. No mention about remaking the world using nothing but hand tools. It might have made a little bit of sense if they had a plan where they wean the world off it's dependence on oil as they remakes the world but no, they want to go fold turkey. The funniest part is that most of the interplay between the two sides is done using items that either have petroleum based products in them or are manufactured using petroleum. A totally silly waste of time.

Karen Pirie (2022– )

Ticker - Right Name For Wrong Reason

[3/10 · 1 February 2023]

There was a scene in the series where it was revealed that most of the cops had nicknames, and it turned out that Karen Pirie's nickname was Ticker, ostensibly because she was chosen for the case because she ticked the right boxes -- they needed a female to lead the case so it looked like they were really concerned about the decades old death of this woman. Well the name was spot on but not for the reasons they had in the series but for how it was presented. Strong female lead? Tick. White men either incompetent, sexist, thugs or evil? Tick. Interracial relationships? Tick. Gay marriage? Tick. Disabled actor? Tick. The actual storyline may have been hopelessly weak and implausible but it definitely ticked all of the right boxes for a modern tv series. Nowadays it seems that it's what really matters.

Violent Night (2022)

Destined to be a cult classic

[10/10 · 27 December 2022]

Oh my, what a fun, bloody mess this movie was!! Santa is getting more cynical and disillusioned with each year, disgusted by the consumerism of modern children to the point that he wants to give up on the holiday altogether. Then he runs into a girl who still believes in him. Unfortunately that girl is in the middle of a dangerous attack and hostage situation so he is forced to step in when he normally stays out of people's everyday lives. The result raises the bar for over the top campy violence and this is destined to be one of those films people drag out every Christmas eve to enjoy while indulging in lots of intoxicants. Merry Christmas to all and to all a bloody good night.

The Traitors UK (2022– )

Painful To Watch

[1/10 · 10 December 2022]

My wife's friend has a child working for the production company so I have to sit in and watch this drivel. The premise with Claudia Winkleman leading a bunch of wannabee TV celebrities in a murder mystery reality series sounded good enough but the reality of this reality show is that everyone is trying so hard to be over the top in their emotional responses to the most mundane of situations that it is beyond farcical. I have watched 5 episodes so far and their reactions to stress would make a room full of nursery children seem calm and rational by comparison. It would be funny if it didn't look so forced and phony. I guess you're supposed to throw in with a few of the contestants but they are all so unlikable that I just sit there no caring who gets murdered, banished or stays. I have read that Claudia Winkleman is now the highest paid performer on British television. Unfortunately she's more like McDonald's than Shakespeare: massive quantities but rubbish quality. She must be crying all the way to the bank. As for me, I just have to grin, bear it and pray for it to end.

César Wagner (2020–2023)

Fun, Familiar Territory

[9/10 · 11 November 2022]

Cesar Wagner is an obsessive hypochondriac with a flair for solving mysteries. Sound familiar? Well if you've see Monk, Professor T or other variations this is another twist on that same theme. Imitation, after all, is the sincerest form of flattery and this series does a good job of continuing that theme. We watch it in French with English subtitles and didn't get bored with any of the episodes. According to the episode synopsis there should be at least 2 more coming and we look forward to seeing them. Nice cast of characters, good location shots, interesting sort of love triangle, all in all a clever and entertaining show.

All Quiet on the Western Front (2022)

Lived Up to the Hype

[10/10 · 6 November 2022]

I watched this movie because of all the positive reviews I have seen. The last war movie that was hyped so much was 1917 and to me that turned out to be a disappointment so I didn't have high hopes going in to see this one. Well I have to say that this one lived up to the hype and did so with fantastic performances, great cinematography and, considering was based on a novel that has been set down on film before, very refreshing. Not for a minute did I think I was just watching a variation on a theme. Everyone involved did a brilliant job and when awards season comes I am guessing that this film will be up for awards in multiple categories. We'll done!

Recipes for Love and Murder (2022– )

Dreadful

[2/10 · 6 November 2022]

We are fans of mysteries, no matter where in the world they are produced, so when I found one from South Africa I didn't hesitate to download it. Other reviewers have commented on the nice scenery and it's hard to disagree with them. Unfortunately that is the only thing I can find to agree with. As a mystery series this is terrible. The storyline is too stuffed with unnecessary subplots that might not be so bad if they weren't so tedious and boring. The acting is amateurish and it struggles to find an identity. Is it a love story? A comedy? A mystery? A cooking show? Whatever it's supposed to be it fails. The scenery is the only thing going for it. If we wanted a travel show it would be okay but as a mystery it flops.

Gangs of London (2020– )

Redefining Over The Top

[2/10 · 5 November 2022]

A power struggle between competing interests for the criminal control of one of the world's most important cities had all of the ingredients to be a compelling, entertaining drama. It definitely fits the bill in those respects. Unfortunately the violence and fighting is so over the top that it turns from a drama into a live action comic book, pure gory fantasy. In a city where, in the real world, knives and acid are the weapons of choice because guns are so hard to come by, automatic weapons and streets littered with bodies make for exciting television but it looks so stupid it ends up ruining the entire farcial show.

The Walking Dead (2010–2022)

Not Even Worth Finishing

[6/10 · 28 October 2022]

I was a huge fan of the series. At first I didn't think it was possible to put a new twist on an old Zombie story but Rick and his motley crew of characters pulled it off, and they pulled it off so brilliantly that the whole world stood up and took notice. The Walking Dead became a phenomenon, and deservedly so. Unfortunately they didn't know when to quit and as the seasons dragged on it became more and more farcical. As it became more tedious to watch the characters get out of impossible situation after impossible situation and becoming more comic like than the comic itself I struggled to find a reason to keep watching it. Now I am on their final episodes and after at first eagerly awaiting each episode I watch them whenever it's convenient and I have nothing better to do. 4 episodes to go and I don't care what happens to them anymore. I never thought I would think this but it I don't see another episode I won't miss it. My rating is for what it used to be, not what it became.

Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries (2012–2015)

As Glamorous As It Is Silly

[5/10 · 27 October 2022]

Phryne Fisher is a wealthy, glamorous, beautifully dressed and coiffed private detective who dazzles Melbourne with her beauty, grace and mystery solving skills. Set in 1920's Australia Miss Fisher shoots like Annie Oakley with her little revolver, fights like a Ninja and runs through men with no fear of getting pregnant or catching an STD, truly liberated. Her hair, dresses, house and car are beautiful and we look forward to see what fantastic outfits she manages to wear every episode In direct inverse proportion to how beautiful the settings are is the stupidity of the plots. Think of a Hallmark Mystery receiving an Oscar nomination for best screenplay compared to the drivel each episode delivers. They almost seem to pay homage to Hallmark with the sexual tension between the policeman (who never wants her to interfere but always shares information and works with her) and the way she manages to knock the weapon out of the villian's hand. The best I can say about the storylines is at least they aren't 90 minutes long. A 10 for presentation, a 0 for plot.

If.... (1968)

It Hasn't Aged Well

[5/10 · 20 October 2022]

A couple of days ago I traveled to Cheltenham, UK with my wife so she could attend a reunion with her college classmates. While she was off with her friends I downloaded a 90 minute audio walking tour. The tour itself was very interesting and one of the stops on the tour was Cheltenham College, where the movie was filmed. There was a prominent mention of the film, Malcom Mcdowell and its importance in British cinema history. When we got home again I downloaded it so I could watch it with my wife, who was born and raised in Cheltenham, so she could spot landmarks. While it was mildly interesting the school scenes, the violence, even the nudity, which was controversial at the time, was very mild compared to modern productions. At times it even seemed corny. So while it can be appreciated for its historical importance it doesn't pass the test of time.

Nikki & Nora: Sister Sleuths (2022 TV Movie)

A Pleasant Surprise

[7/10 · 19 October 2022]

We weren't expecting much. After all, this is a Hallmark Mystery so the bar is set low right from the beginning. Okay, so it isn't going to win any awards for creativity, keeping you on the edge of your seat guessing or acting skills but the ladies did a good job and there were a few surprises thrown in that you normally don't see in a Hallmark mystery. Nobody even got a gun kicked out of their hand by the good guys! At the end we actually were entertained and, rather than dreading the next installment we are hoping that this turns into a series so we can see what they manage to come up with next.