Change Your Image
bkeenan-26796
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
See: I See You (2022)
Drunk writers
I know they were trying to tie up the lose ends here and kill off some main characters, but am I the only one who thinks a random woman who can suddenly hear footsteps several meters underground is impossible? Am I the only one who thought of making some loud noise so the sighted ones could massacre the blind soldiers? Did it not occur to them that of the 10 tunnels leading them out of town, the one tunnel they shouldn't use is the one that goes directly under the invading army? I feel like I could go on and on with these massive plot holes, and the conclusion I have come to, is that either the writers were drunk, or they allowed an trained octopus to write the final episode by attaching a pointing device to one of its tentacles and asking it to pick from a series of random cards containing stupid things that no one would ever do in real life. When Kofun decides to gouge his eyes out so he can understand how his son experiences the world, I think it really summarises how stupid the writers think their audience is to believe this would be someone's choice. I mean, just the message it sends - it's better to blind yourself than to be different. It's better to throw away your gifts that to make a difference in the world, because making a difference might be hard. It's really setting a low bar for any of the kids watching this show.
I liked the show, the acting (I even tolerated the kids) and the storyline, right up until the last episode. Then it was like getting punched in the face by stupidity. Not sure why no one else has noticed this so I thought I should write a review in case anyone else was feeling the same and we can sit and stew about how the writers spat on a great show in the last episode. They really dragged it out too, a bit like the third lord of the rings movie - the first half of it was the conclusion, the second half is a tour of every single character we met in the show to make sure we know what every one of them were feeling about how it all went down. Bit like this review, it just needs to end.
Occupation: Rainfall (2020)
No redeeming features
I was watching this for boba fett, but wanted punch something at about the 10 min mark. I did get to see boba fett but it took me three sittings. And as soon as I saw him I stopped watching. Everything about this movie is terrible. I feel ashamed of being an Aussie. I wish I could un-see the bit that I saw.
Invasion (2021)
Painful to watch
A combination of terrible story line, terrible acting, unscary and unexplained aliens that seem totally directionless in their "invasion" attempt, the agnosingly slow waste of time only builds anger instead of any form of suspense. The money wasted making this show should have been funnelled into some R&D to help Apple come up with a new product for once.
Prisoners of the Ghostland (2021)
Another Nic Cage gem
I enjoyed this movie. A couple of things stopped me from giving it a 10 though - the sets seemed very cheap, and the crowd seemed a bit awkard while Nic was walking around. They didn't really seem into it which pulled me out of the story.
This is supposed to be a crazy adventure, but i feel like they didn't add enough crazy to the receipe. They could have amped it up a bit more, and except for two scenes (a ball explosion and a neck slice) it didn't have nearly enough gore for me.
In summary - I really liked this movie, the cast, acting, writing wasn't too bad, direction etc; but it lost 1 point for not enough gore, 1 point for the cheap sets and unconvincing crowds, and 1 point for a lack of crazy.
If you're a fan of Nic's other recent work, I'm sure you'll enjoy this, you might just need a couple of drinks to help you ignore the imperfections.
Vicious Fun (2020)
Fun but missing something
The film itself had all the elements of a great horror / romance / comedy but was missing one thing. Actually make that two things - romance and character development.
The romance was almost there, with two different love interests, but by the end of the movie neither materialise and the main protagonist is firmly in yet another friend zone.
Which leads me to the lack of character development - the main character Joel starts the movie as a sad loser infatuated with his roomate, only to finish the movie as a sad loser infatuated with a serial revenge killer.
Usually in any other movie, the lead character experiences a series of events which ultimately lead to growth, but this aspect was totally missing from the film. We finish up with Joel not having learnt anything or grown at all - he simply changed the target of his affections. In my opinion this leaves the viewer without a moral message and it left me with a feeling of underwhelm. This is something which could have very easily been rectified with a better story line for the ending, and its confusing to me why they didn't try to include it? Perhaps they didn't think they could make it believable to turn Joel's character around into a tough guy worthy of Carries affection within a 1.5hr movie? He was doing pretty good there in the hospital with almost taking out the bad guy, but for some reason they thought it would be funnier to make him gag every time he sees a dead person instead? WTF?
Apart from the stupid ending and missed opportunity, I think everything else about this movie was great - it held my attention, i enjoyed the humour and the gore, and was still very enjoyable. If they fixed up that one thing i would have easily given it a 9, but for missing such an easy free kick, they lose two points.
Awake (2021)
I've seen worse
This film really reminded me of Tom Cruises War of the Worlds. Except not as cool. I've read the reviews and i hear what people are saying - slow, poor writing etc, but i like most of the decisions the mum was making, and when the movie was finished, i kept thinking about what might happen next which i liked. For those reasons i give it a 5. I've seen plenty worse movies - like Alien Conquest. OMG. One thing i would have liked though is a better conclusion for Dodge. And maybe a faster way to kill the mum.
Away: Vital Signs (2020)
50minutes of cringe
The cringe level of away took it to new highs with episode 8. So dumb yet so hard to watch. Why am I watching this again? I think I need to go do something more constructive with my time. Like watching the grass grow. Curse whoever told me to watch this show. I've been able to get through any movie or tv series, even terrible ones. But I think this show has broken me. It makes me angry in a special way. I'm not even sure how it's doing it. It is truely magical in how awful this show is. Don't think I'll ever to be able to watch something with any of these actors in it again. Well maybe the Russian guy. But not anyone else. Especially not Hillary. I used to like her in that Clint Eastwood movie. She's gone downhill from there. Oh look, the episode is over. I don't have to keep distracting myself by writing this. Catch ya.
The Walking Dead: World Beyond (2020)
Would rather join the dead than watch more of this.
I would have given this a negative star rating if that was possible. This didn't just bore me but made me angry with how bad every part of this show is - casting, acting, writing. The only redeeming feature was the zombie make up. However for some reason even the zombies are terrible in this epic waste of time. I don't normally write reviews but I had to in this case to express my anger at myself for wasting minutes of my life watching this trash. I'm off to do something more fun now like peeling off my nails with a rusty cheese grater.
Friend Request (2016)
Excessive use of eye makeup
Not sure if it was just me, but the film makers seemed to try and convey emotions with ever increasing amounts of eye makeup.
Horror movies are known for patch story lines, but I had real issues with this one and it caused some serious IDGAF's.