tamstrat Reviews

13 Minutes (2021)

Too woke for me

[2/10 · 15 August 2022]

I can sum this movie up very briefly-if you are white, straight and believe in God you're a horrible person. That's pretty much it, oh, BTW, there is a tornado for a few minutes at the end.

Psycho Storm Chaser (2021 TV Movie)

Ridiculous but typical Lifetime fare.

[4/10 · 17 September 2021]

Anyone expecting to watch a Lifetime Movie and expecting high art is crazy. We watch these as pure escapism and to get a good laugh.

This movie is as dumb as any other one I've ever seen. Bad acting, effects, etc. But having said that, I forgot my problems for awhile and laughed at the stupidity of it, and so that's okay in my book.

Shock Docs: Amityville Horror House (2020) Season 2, Episode 1

Decent documentary on the murder house

[8/10 · 28 January 2021]

I have been fascinated with the Amityville murders since the mid 70's. Yes, I'm that old! I personally feel the motive for the murders was not supernatural but the dysfunctional family dynamic of the Defoe family and by greed.

This documentary focuses mainly on the Warrens, the paranormal investigators who went into the house about 1 1/2 years after the murders. There's also audiotape interviews with George and Kathy Lutz, the first owners of the house after the murders. They do seem credible, but I still don't think the house was necessarily haunted. I think some weird things happened, I think maybe they let their imaginations get the best of them. Or maybe they bought the house, realized they were in over their heads financially and decided this would be a good way to get out and make some money.

However, it is a good documentary and I recommend.

Miracle on the Mountain: The Kincaid Family Story (2000 TV Movie)

If you have to

[4/10 · 27 August 2020]

Watching this movie was like getting your teeth cleaned, do you want to.....no

The story pretty much centers around a rich family wanting to go to the mountains on their private jet. Dad is the pilot. There is a spoiled little rich entitled daughter who is alienated from the family and doesn't go. The plane crashes, family has to struggle to survive. Now it's up to the daughter to rescue them.

Almost cringe worthy. But I love Patty Duke and anything she is in. Watched it because of her. Skip. It unless me, you are a die hard Patty Duke fan.

Terror at London Bridge (1985 TV Movie)

Not bad if you're bored

[5/10 · 27 August 2020]

The story of the "Terror at London Bridge" is pretty ridiculous but it held my interest. The plot is a pretty weird, the London Bridge (in real life) was dismantled and shipped to Arizona. Yes Arizona. Anyway, a tourist couple are staying near the bridge and the wife cuts her finger and Jack the Ripper is resurrected and starts his reign of terror again in Arizona (of all places)!

It's pretty cheesy, but David Hasselhoff was easy on the eyes. Stefanie Kramer held her own, although overly tanned and the hair, the shoulder pads, but hey, it's the 80's. Adrienne Barbeau was not utilized as much as she could have been, but did a decent job. Randolph Mantooth was fair enough as the co-cop friend of Hasselhoff.

This was a TV movie, which I realize young people can't comprehend these days. I grew up watching the "ABC Movie of the Week" back in the 70's, which actually have some fantastic movies, which are cult classics now. This isn't a classic, no way near that, but it was okay, and had a few suspenseful moments. Would I go out of my way to watch this, no. But if it came on, I had nothing else to do, yeah, sure.

Sensing Murder (2006– )

Interesting Crime Show

[7/10 · 8 July 2020]

I remember watching this several years ago, when it first premiered on TV. Due to some paranormal experiences I, myself as a child experienced, I've always been interested in all things supernatural.

The show was well done, and I liked both of the psychic's. For some reason I found that Laurie Campbell seemed more credible even though Pam Coronado has more fame due to the "DC Sniper" case.

Sadly, I don't think they helped to solve a single case, and when a few cases were solved, their "impressions and visions" were completely off. The Susannah Chase case being the most glaring. But, I still enjoyed watching the show. Are they truly psychic? Perhaps or perhaps not.

There's Something Wrong with Aunt Diane (2011 TV Movie)

Sad, sad, sad

[7/10 · 6 May 2019]

The story of "Aunt Diane" is ultimately a story about denial. The family of Diane Schuler, while confronted with overwhelming evidence of her being drunk and high, is stunning. I know they loved her. But PLEASE! Toxicology reports have no reason to lie. This is one of the saddest stories I've ever heard. The fact that they thought she "had a stroke" was amazing. I don't think Diane Schuler was evil, I think she was an addict, who hid it very well from her family and friends. Based on the toxicology reports she was amazingly intoxicated but she maintained well enough to go to McDonald's and a gas station-HELLO! This shows me she had built up a tolerance to alcohol and weed, otherwise she would not be able to walk.

Then it (Vodka and Weed) truly kicked in. That's where it went off the rails. How awful for everyone involved. Those precious children taken, the son surviving but impaired for life. And the innocent men just driving to get a Spaghetti and Meatball dinner... I know the family loved Diane, but PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE HER CULPABILITY IN THIS....SHE WAS DRUNK AND HIGH. End of story.

The Birds II: Land's End (1994 TV Movie)

Not as bad as I thought it would be

[5/10 · 25 November 2018]

Based on the reviews here I expected a terrible movie, and while it wasn't the best movie I have ever seen, it certainly wasn't the worst either. It held my interest and some of the bird attacks were actually pretty scary. As others have stated, the ending was my only real disappointment, it was way to abrupt and left me thinking, "what"? Overall, if I were home alone and bored on a rainy night I would watch this again.

Don't Go to Sleep (1982 TV Movie)

Creepy made for TV movie

[9/10 · 22 September 2016]

Somehow I missed this movie when it was seen on TV back in 1982 (I had a small toddler then, was working full time and didn't have a lot of time for TV watching then). I was a huge fan back in the 70's of the Movie of the week, especially loving the scary ones such as "Satan's School for Girls", etc. This little gem was right up there with the best of them.

Dennis Weaver and Valerie Harper play parents who lost their eldest daughter in a car accident. Relocating to a new house, weird things start to happen. Mary, their surviving daughter begins to see her dead older sister, Jennifer, who encourages Mary to start killing off the surviving family. One by one, they all start dying by weird means.

The writing and acting are all top notch, Weaver and Harper play their roles as the guilt ridden parents with pathos. The acting is superb! There are some effectively creepy scenes, as others have noted, the pizza cutter scene is particularly eerie and effective. I love movies that convey fear and suspense without gore and this movie delivers.

I watched this on YouTube, evidently it has not been released on DVD, which is a shame. So many of the old, eerie Movie of the Week movies have not been released on DVD and it's a damn shame.

Sharknado (2013 TV Movie)

What's not to love?

[12 July 2013]

If have waited so many years for a movie as cheesy and campy as Sharknado!!!! I mean who wants to watch the academy award winning Lincoln on pay per view when the SyFy channel offers a gem that contains drug dealers, a former surf superstar who while a bar owner is a meterologist and super hero who can without help can repel overpasses and save a school bus load of school kids and be a counselor to his tortured, rejected teenage daughter,who can swim in blood soaked mansions & fight his way out of a shark with a chainsaw, there's the girl who looks like a stripper who is pretty bad ass with a shotgun (yes you can kill a huge shark flying through the air with a shotgun and a cue stick for that matter), a one dimensional ex wife (numbly played by the ever zombie like Tara Reid) don't forget the lecherous old drunk who rescues Golden Retrievers with bar stools, yes y'all, Bar Stools!!! Forget the current gun law legislation, let's outlaw bar stools, you can kick some serious shark ass with that! It just can't get any better folks!!!!!

This was the most fun I have had watching a movie in years and I am not even joking. I mean, sharks attacking people in little to no water, a giant roller coaster squashing people, tornado's with sharks flying around, where were the octopus', jellyfish, whales, etc? It was so bad it is FANTASTIC!!!!! Please make a sequel, PLEASE! Maybe sat in the south and call it Gatornado or Crococaine.

The Creature Walks Among Us (1956)

Pretty good version of the telling of the Gill Man

[6/10 · 1 May 2013]

This is the third & final rendering of the tale of the Gill Man. Seems a group of scientists head to the Florida Everglades to locate, capture and study the creature. He is captured and nearly killed when he catches on fire. He is left without gills but has lungs (who knew) and he is transported to San Francisco why there?

Then he is penned up with animals and dressed in human clothing????? All the while the scientist played by Jeff Morrow, is losing his grip on reality due to jealousy over his young, sexy but faithful wife whom all the other male scientists are interested in. A murder occurs, sending the creature into a murderous rampage.

This is a different theme than the previous two outings, but the acting is good and the plot kept my attention.

The Hearse (1980)

The Hearse How do you kill a ghost?

[7 May 2012]

I have to say this is not a bad little horror movie from the early 80's. It is pretty atmospheric, lot's of creepy little moments, but I have to say, there are a lot things left unanswered...

Yes, we get that Jane's Aunt got into Satanism and abandoned her faith for her love affair with Robert (Tom), but why? What happened to her Aunt? Why was Paul the young man killed? Why did Jane have a nervous breakdown? The most crazy thing that I found was when the hearse went off the cliff and exploded....that killed the ghost of Tom? Do you kill a ghost in a car wreck? That made absolutely no sense to me. An exorcism yes, a car crash, not so much.

I did enjoy this movie but the ending was a bummer,,,, nuff said.

Mamma Mia! (2008)

Fun movie but better on stage

[8/10 · 21 July 2008]

I am a huge fan of Abba (and have been since the 70's!) so I highly anticipated this film. I have to say I enjoyed it very much but after having seen the show on Broadway twice, this isn't as good in my opinion as the live shows. The energy that feeds off the crowd at the live show is amazing and it just wasn't there as much watching it on film. However, the actors did a good job with the songs and the Greek scenery was amazing. As others have stated, Pierce Brosnan was the weakest of all the actors singing, but he gave it a good old college try, and he is very engaging and handsome as usual. Meryl Streep looks great and did a fine job with the singing. And Julie Walters is a hoot as one of Donna's friends who arrive for the nuptials. I would recommend the movie but if you ever get a chance to see the show live it is much, much better.

Halloween (2007)

In a word-DISGUSTING

[1/10 · 6 January 2008]

I will be the first to admit I am a mid 40 mom of 2 who knows very little about Rob Zombie who directed and wrote the screenplay for this piece of trash. But I remember being a senior in high school and going to the original "Halloween" by John Carpenter and Debra Hill and being terrified for days after. This movie wasn't scary-it was just plain gross and badly written and filmed. As many others here have stated, Zombie took an American Classic movie and put his own sick, misogynistic spin on it. Why? In the original, what was so scary to me personally was the fact that we did not know why Michael Myers was so evil-was he demonic, pure evil or just a little boy who was severely pathological? Carpenter did not tell and that added to the suspense and horror. Here, in the first minutes of the movie we find out that poor Michael is the product of a severely dysfunctional, white trash family. This causes someone to go nuts and gruesomely murder family members and strangers alike? I think not. The characters are not likable, the only one I did like, the Hispanic janitor in the asylum was killed off by his friend "Mikey". There was no character development of anyone. The language was horrible. Does every single person have to use the vilest language imaginable in order to get their point across? It was absurd. The females in the movie were all horrible and annoying. Even Laurie, the lovable, level headed babysitter in the original movie was annoying. I felt no connection with her whatsoever. Annie and Lynda were so obnoxious in this movie. Horrible! The thing that really bothered me was the amount of violence Zombie used in this film towards the females. The rape scene in the asylum was totally disgusting and pointless. It had no plot value, it was just Zombie wanting to throw it in for shock value or his own sick fantasies, whichever it is, it was pointless and disgusting. Also, the killing of Lynda and Annie's attack again tells me that deep down Zombie is a misogynist, I really believe it. Poor Malcolm McDowell, the brilliant actor from "A Clockwork Orange" has been reduced to this. How sad.

While I am not familiar with Zombie's previous movies, if they are anywhere near as bad as this one I will stay away. If you revere the original "Halloween" don't waste your valuable time watching this garbage.

Night at the Museum (2006)

Good family fare

[6/10 · 26 December 2006]

This movie is fun for kids of all ages. The storyline is simple, Ben Stiller plays a man who just can't seem to get it together so to speak. His ex-wife is not wanting their son to spend anymore time than necessary with the Dad until he gets his act together and finds a steady job. Hence he takes a job at the Museum of Natural History as a night watchman. The story takes off from there.

The movie is fun and enjoyable. It certainly not heady stuff, this movie will not win any academy awards, but if you are looking for a movie you can take the whole family to and have a few laughs, this movie should satisfy.

The Nativity Story (2006)

Beautiful version of the greatest story ever told

[8/10 · 19 December 2006]

This movie is a beautiful movie to take one's family to. If you believe in the Virgin Birth of Jesus this is a faithful retelling (with the exception of the Magi) of the biblical story.

The writing, costumes and acting are all top notch. I was very impressed with the presentation of the story of the conception of Jesus, and Mary and Joseph's reactions to this dumbfounding turn of events in their ordinary lives. Can you even imagine a 13-14 year old Jewish girl in that time, being told by an angel of God that she is to bear the Messiah, she will become the Mother of God? This movie shows the very human sides of Mary and Joseph and the difficulties they must have encountered while preparing for the 2nd most monumental event in history, the birth of Christ (the greatest event of course was His Passion and Resurrection).

I loved this movie and hope everyone can enjoy it!

I Walked with a Zombie (1943)

Creepy masterpiece

[10/10 · 24 November 2006]

When I watched this movie, I expected (based on the goofy title) a "B" movie, what I saw was a wonderfully written and acted movie. Val Lewton's vision of "Jane Eyre", set in San Sebastian satisfied me in every way.

Frances Dee plays Betsy Connell, an idealistic nurse who goes to San Sebastian, in the Carribbean, to take care of the catatonic wife of Paul Holland (played by Tom Conway). She arrives not knowing that Jessica is to quote her "a mental case". Is Jessica the victim of a strange virus that robbed her of her mental facilities or a victim of voodoo? The dynamics of the island and the 2 brothers who both loved the doomed Jessica are explored amongst the background of revenge and voodoo. The scene where Betsy takes Jessica to the voodoo "home fort" is one of the eeriest, scariest scenes I have ever scene.

Lewton creates an atmosphere of dread and fear without displaying any overt violence or gore. That is the work of a true master.

I love all of Lewton's movies but this stands above the rest as a true masterpiece of it's genre. Enjoy!!!!

Breaking Bonaduce (2005–2006)

Those crazy Bonaduce's!!!!

[5/10 · 16 November 2006]

Watching this reality series is like watching a slow moving train wreck, it's awful, it's horrible but you can turn away.

What to say about Danny and Gretchen that hasn't already been said? They are both celebrity whores big time to allow cameras into the meltdown that is called their marriage.

This is the second season and sad to say, things are not improving for the family. During the first season I had a lot of compassion for everyone involved, but now I am beginning to think Gretchen is using Danny both monetarily and for the "fame" itself. Not that he is perfect, God knows how F****D up he is, and I'm sure living with him would be difficult at best, but to make the man beg and grovel and not to let him touch you? I don't get it, either you love him and are willing to give it another go for the like 1,000th time or for God's sake cut him loose!!!! He deserves at least some honesty for crying out loud. She seems to get off on him telling her how much he loves her and needs her and can't live without her and she acts as if she could care less. She's a heartless bitch in my opinion. The recent episode of her going to Boston with him proved that. She went to look like "Gretchen Bondaduce, supportive wife" in public and then they get back to the hotel and she invites him to sleep in her hotel room and then tells him he is not to touch her? What the hell? I don't get it.

And Dr. Gary, what is up with this guy? He looks like he has been Botox'd to the max, he can't even move his face when he is chastising Danny and he has obvious anger towards Danny that tends to make him side constantly with Gretchen. They are like 2 sorority sisters getting together to cut up poor Danny. Don't get me wrong, Danny pushes everyone's buttons, but Dr. Gary always sides with Gretchen instead of trying to stay impartial and make both the adults in this relationship own up to their dysfunctional ways. Gretchen is not the perfect saint that Dr. Gary tends to make her out to be. I think she is totally manipulative.

The obvious victims in this whole mess are the 2 Bonaduce children. How sad for them that their mother hates their father and encourages her young son to make fun of his father's bipolar disorder!!! In 20 years we will probably be hearing about these 2 kids multiple stints in rehab, arrests, etc.

Watch this show if you must (I have to say, once you start watching you can't stop)but don't be surprised if it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

Dead Famous (2004–2006)

Dead Famous same old stuff

[3/10 · 16 May 2006]

I wanted to like this show, and the hosts are a likable pair, but the show is the same show over and over. Never any real proof of a haunting anywhere they go. Just some photo's of orbs (most paranormal researchers don't consider orbs paranormal) and Chris contorting and making weird noises, sorry Chris but I can do the same thing if I wanted to. Also the choice of locations leave a lot to be desired. If you want to catch a ghost's spirit you should go to actual places they lived, not a restaurant they went to at some point in their lives....

I like Gail Porter, she is cute and perky, even after losing her hair I think she is awesome, but they show just doesn't deliver the goods. However, it can be entertaining as long as you know you aren't going to see a haunting.

The Wolf Man (1941)

Even if a man is pure at heart and says his prayers by night....

[6 April 2006]

This is one of the Universal Classic Horror movies of the 1940's and it still is fun to watch.

Lon Chaney plays the poor victim/werewolf Larry Talbot with just the right amount of sadness and vulnerability. He infuses the role with confusion and despair, it is truly good acting. His later roles were caricatures of this role and as he evidently sank into alcoholism his roles became more and more ridiculous.

Claude Rains plays his very British father, Sir John very well as well. It is never really explained why Larry has such an American accent (we are told he has been in America for a number of years but still this is still not fully explored). Evelyn Ankers plays the lovely daughter of the local antiques dealer whom Larry tries to win but loses to his werewolf-ism.

There is plenty of fog and spooky atmosphere to go around. Bela Lugosi has a small supporting role as Bela the Gypsy who is also a werewolf who bites Larry and turns him into a werewolf.

A great old horror movie to watch on a rainy night.

Diagnosis Murder (1993–2001)

Not bad considering...

[14 March 2006]

I liked the series in the early years, it leaned a little towards the geriatric set, kind of a male based "Murder She Wrote", but Dick Van Dyke is a great actor so I enjoyed watching him portray the amiable Dr. Mark Sloan. He worked well with his real life son, Barry Van Dyke. The series was well written in the beginning, but towards the end it got really lame. It seemed that every episode featured the whole "Van Dyke" clan, and sadly to say, none of them could act with the exception of Dick and Barry. I've heard of nepotism but this took the cake, and some of the story lines got really,really out there, especially "The Blair Nurse Project" which had the young Van Dykes searching (and yikes-finding) there is a ghost in the basement of Community General Hospital. The series was cancelled shortly thereafter and I wasn't surprised. Occasionally I will watch the reruns on the PAX network or Hallmark Channel and I do enjoy them in small doses.

Cat Ballou (1965)

My my that whiskey will do your mind

[10/10 · 14 March 2006]

This is my all time favorite Jane Fonda movie. She plays the role of "Cat Ballou" as a lark, very funny, sexy and sweet. The schoolmarm turned outlaw due to the death of her father is a very fun movie to watch. The supporting characters, including the amazing Lee Marvin are unforgettable. Lee Marvin, in dual roles of Kid Sheelan and the baddie Tim Strawn leaves a lasting impression. His drunken gunslinger steals every scene he is in bar none. He plays the part with hilarious conviction and Jane Fonda plays her role with just the right amount of innocence, anger and sexiness. Always worth watching. John Marley plays Cat's father. He is hilarious as the rancher who refues to cooperate with the local authorities. This movie holds up well and is just as fun to watch today as it was when it was released all those years ago.

Glen or Glenda (1953)

Theater of the absurd

[4/10 · 8 March 2006]

This is Ed Wood's masterpiece. One literally has to experience this film to understand how nuts it truly is. The film literally makes no sense whatsoever and that is the brilliance of it. The story of the transvestite Glen/Glenda is told by not 1, but count them 2, yes 2 narrators. One of whom was the sad, pathetic drug addled Bela Lugosi. Watching him rambling almost incoherently "Bevare, bevare..." it is hard to imagine just 20 years before he was the toast of Broadway as "Dracula", just watching him spouting his mindless chatter gives the film a surreal quality. Obviously this was the biography of Wood himself and watching him take the angora sweater from his confused yet loving fiancée is priceless. This movie takes camp to a whole level of it's own. No other film, not even "Plan 9 from Outer Space" can touch it. One watches it in utter amazement.

The Amityville Horror (2005)

Pretty ridiculous

[3/10 · 12 November 2005]

I guess this wouldn't be a bad horror movie if you had never read the book by Jay Anson, or seen the original movie. I HAVE read the book and seen the original movie and have seen footage of the real George and Kathy Lutz discussing their supposed experiences in the home in Amityville and this movie was nothing like it with a few exceptions. If I were George Lutz I think I would be ready to sue the makers of this movie. I don't recall anywhere seeing, reading or hearing that George Lutz attempted to murder the family as is portrayed in this movie. Also the Dafoe murders were not accurately portrayed. There was no Jodie Dafoe. The 2 daughters were Dawn and Allison. Dawn was 17 and Allison 12. Allison was the younger and was killed lying facedown in her bed, not shot in a closet. She was also on the 2nd floor, not in the upstairs bedroom, Dawn the older sister was killed there while lying face down in bed. I read that the home may have been built over an Indian burial ground but the scenes in the basement with the preacher and the indians was absurd to say the least. This movie did not scare me at all, at times I was just left shaking my head most of the time. If anyone is interested in what really happened in Amityville should read a good book called "The night the Dafoes Died" instead of watching this mind numbing movie.

My Fair Brady (2005–2008)

Quit whining

[7 November 2005]

I hoped to like this show, I truly did. I like Chris Knight, always watched him as Peter Brady on the Brady Bunch and so I anticipated this show. Sorry to say it hasn't impressed me much. Adrianne Curry is a whining baby as far as I am concerned. She is 22 years old and acts 14 years old. Mr.Knight is more than twice her age and has 2 failed marriages in his past so I can certainly understand his reluctance to marry this child and make no mistake, that is what she is. I am sure she is great in bed but sad to say we all have to get dressed and get out of bed sometime sooner or later and I really feel if he marries her it will be a disaster.

This show is the same episode over and over, her whining about him not wanting to commit and him telling her to move out and grow up. Boring!!!!!!! Chris, go with your gut dude and get with a mature woman who will not pressure you!!!!!!!