epalejandrocarrillo Reviews

She's the Man (2006)

Garbage

[3/10 · 19 July 2022]

The plot and character intro lasts all of 9 minutes. The only time I laughed was at how bad everything is. Pointless scenes and forced jokes that just don't land it's just embarrassing. Seriously go watch Just One of the Guys.

Planet of the Apes (2001)

Better than I remember but the ending.

[5/10 · 11 July 2022]

I remember watching this in the theater and being extremely disappointed. The original POTA is imbedded in the culture and it's ending can't be topped. In this reimagined version you can't have a twist ending, nothing can beat the original. Looking at it again it's makeup and acting ( not Mark Wahlberg ) is exceptional. The creepy way Lia looks at Davidson is culminating in a crowd inducing cringe kiss. The new ending might be interesting to those people who have read the book but it disappointed everyone else. So much work and potential waisted on a weak ending. It's better than my first reaction maybe you should give it a second watch.

Moonfall (2022)

Get some popcorn and turn it up.

[7/10 · 8 May 2022]

Big, dumb, loud and fun. I can't believehow much fun I actually had watching this movie. Roland Emmerich's movie's are remakes of 50s scifi like War of the Worlds, When Worlds Collide and this is just like those kinds of movies. The third act is where this ridiculous story shines, I gave up about logic and just went along for the ride and had a lot of fun.

Terminator II (1989)

The best kind of bad

[6/10 · 7 November 2021]

Shlock ripoff of Aliens and The Terminator. Must be seen to be believed. I laughed, I cried laughing and it is glorious. Watch with friends and cocktails.

Darkness Falls (2003)

An underrated gem

[8/10 · 24 June 2021]

When it was in the theater It sounded terrible. I rented it because I couldn't find anything else and thought I could make fun of it. I was completely wrong. This is a must if you have a surround sound system. Fun and entertaining.

Delta Farce (2007)

Give me a minute and I'll explain.

[6/10 · 15 April 2021]

1. Yes it's a 'check your brain at the door ' funny 2. If you like three amigos or tropic thunder give it another chance you might actually have fun.

Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021)

Absolutely incredible.

[10/10 · 24 March 2021]

I've seen this movie twice from start to finish and that's the only way I want to ever watch this movie from start to finish. It is absolutely incredible this man's vision and it is incredible that Warner Brothers ever doubt it that vision. I can only hope that they can continue on run and finish his vision for another two movies at least and bring a finale to the story he started. Epic is this word that is used too often but it is Justified in this film.

Color Out of Space (2019)

Better than annihilation but just barely.

[6/10 · 26 February 2021]

HP lovecraft probably at its best. Creepy and immersive. After years the director seems not to loose a step and brings a nightmare to life. Nicholas cage is perfect for this kind of movie.

Shark Attack (1999 TV Movie)

It actually tried.

[6/10 · 22 January 2021]

For a B movie it was rather entertaining. It has a story, action and sharks. My expectations were low but I was pleasantly surprised.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Action takes a backseat to the story.

[6/10 · 26 December 2020]

More of a morality movie rather than a punch the bad guy in the face movie.

Bait (III) (2012)

Perfect for bad movie night with friends and beer.

[5/10 · 15 October 2020]

This movie has everything, ex girlfriend that's with a guy that totally has a smaller penis than you, Dr. Doom and poor man's Mila Kunis.

Dead Rising: Watchtower (2015)

Garbage

[3/10 · 11 October 2020]

Watch something else. For a two hour movie with terrible character introductions cutaways to comic relief news broadcast and slow pacing I'm suprised that nobody in the editing room said " should we maybe trim I'd down a make it more interesting, at the very least entertaining?". But no, that never happened.

Ouija: Origin of Evil (2016)

Absolutely worth your time.

[7/10 · 11 October 2020]

Better than the original this prequel wraps up the whole story. A flawed but solid horror movie is fun and a throwback to the great 70s horror movies.

Ouija (II) (2014)

Predictably fun.

[6/10 · 11 October 2020]

As bad as the reviews are and as generic a teeny bopper horror movie this is, I actually had fun. I heard that they reshoot half of the movie but I think they wanted it to be more like the conjuring.

The House of the Devil (2009)

Like watching paint dry

[4/10 · 28 September 2020]

Forget about all the 80s nostalgia because you are better off actually watching an 80s horror movie. Don't waist your time.

ClownTown (2016)

Watch something else.

[2/10 · 23 September 2020]

If you watch assault on precinct 13 and Texas chainsaw massacre and have no idea of how to write a script you could make your own clown town movie.

Yo-Yo Girl Cop (2006)

Boring

[2/10 · 21 September 2020]

1. Suicide website 2. Undercover yo yo girl cop 3. Mass suicide 4. Bank robbery 5. Every single cliche you can think of. There, now you don't have to watch this lack of fun movie.

Child's Play (2019)

A waist of Mark Hamill, again.

[2/10 · 19 September 2020]

At first I thought it was just nostalgia but forty minutes in the brutal realization that the movie sucks. I want to say nice try but it just sucks.

Jupiter Ascending (2015)

Essence of gelfling.

[4/10 · 9 August 2020]

The focus of the story is all over the place. The first big action is rendered pointless because the aliens that are trying to kill Jupiter fix the city. Apparently even aliens beleve in reincarnation and the bureaucracy in having to re register when they come back. Jupiter reads the intergalactic monopoly rule book and is trying to play the game. Jupiters space family is just as bad as her earth family. Jupiter loves dogs. The stupid end. The music and visual effects are waisted on this story.

Waterworld (1995)

My boat.

[7/10 · 8 August 2020]

As much hate from the critics this movie gets there's no denying it is an action packed entertaining movie. A twist on the road warrior pos apocalyptic genera with a teddy ruxpin blimp, this movie still holds up. Kevin Costner is bad ass modern version of John Wayne. Denise Hopper is excellent in every scene. Real stunts, real sets, and production value alone makes it a worthwhile investment.

The Abyss (1989)

Technically impressive.

[6/10 · 23 May 2020]

An impressive film especially when you consider the lengths that the director goes to but unfortunately the sci-fi part really takes away from the dramatic events. If the director would have eliminated the aliens and kept it a drama it would have been one of the best movies for everyone involved. Movie endings can change your opinion of the whole and the overly preachy end really ruined a great experience. Everyone worked so hard for a good movie when it could have been great.

Terminator: Dark Fate (2019)

So bad it's ok

[2/10 · 28 March 2020]

What a peace of garbage. Cocaine is a hell of a drug but did anyone bother to read the script!? They thought this was a good idea!? I understand that people need to work but I would have decided not to do this movie because of my reputation. If you want to watch this movie have a good supply of alcohol and watch with friends and don't take it to seriously.

The House That Jack Built (2018)

Art shmart

[1/10 · 15 March 2020]

The worst thing a movie can be is boring. Over describing a simple thing dosen't make it smart or in this case sophisticated.

Poseidon (2006)

Give it another chance

[7/10 · 13 March 2020]

The production value is tremendous. The cast and acting is great. Intense and overwhelming.

Kong: Skull Island (2017)

Kong is king again!

[7/10 · 1 February 2020]

By far the best of the new monster movies. Total survival horror. Godzilla king of monsters and Godzilla respectively. I hope this franchise continues with Godzilla vs King Kong with a good story and intense action.