Distinctly average sadly... This would have made a great 40min short with it's originality in the end. There isn't much of a script other than the twist. And I get it's low budget but I'm not sure disco lighting was really great. Poor choices make it one of the most dull movies I've seen in a long time. There really isn't much dialogue, and everything is a bit too understated. Wish we had more aliens to cast judgment on many on this planet however.
Reviews
35 Reviews
Morbius
(2022)
Should have taken the 45mins off Batman to fill this
6 April 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Hmm... The sad thing for me is the first half I thought was alright, and I feel bad for Jared Leto as he is absolutely fantastic in it & the only decently rounded character. The antagonist went from nice guy to indiscriminate evil man child with absolutely no gradient in between it made my eyes roll into the back of my head. I feel like they cut out 45mins that they needed as filler to bulk out relationships & personalities & a few scenes in the second half happened without explanation or resolution.
Unwatchable Like The Show
19 March 2022
Just those opening seconds seeing Jeremy Kyle speak to the audience like that shows what kind of man he is. Disgusting. I cannot watch anymore clips like that, let alone actors pretending to be the staff whose voices they are using. The show was cancelled 14 years and one death too late if it was treating everyone involved like Jeremy's doormat.
Ignore the sceptics
15 March 2022
I'm really annoyed with how disgusting the 1/10 reviews are on here, so had to say something. Saying Ty should be in jail, etc... He gives his readings for free. The TV companies pay him, and who are you to say he is looking up information, when he actually asks that no one ever give him information to cloud his judgement. If you watched the show you'd know tapping into his gift has almost killed him & he wants to help others. Also, I've only ever seen people come away with an emotional weight lifted off them, so who are you to be so vile when no matter your beliefs he is helping people?! He doesn't prey on those grieving. It's them who seek him out. The people on the show are on his waiting list, and see it as his speciality. Get your facts right & just don't watch it or see a psychic. I've spoken to one similar to Tyler & facts like mum being glad she was found before the cat ate her are not online. We never even took photos of the cat. Or the fact she had rattly breathing. Some people are just gifted. My psychic even called out my mum being worried I was a coach potato! Who would professionally do that? Lol. And I paid for him. Ty gives free ones away on his social media out of nowhere to randoms. Same on his stage show. No charlatan.
Nightmare Alley
(2021)
Beautiful but boring
26 January 2022
The cinematography is beyond stunning, the acting is amazing... It was just unbelievably dull story wise. It needed more of the action from the last 25mins & I guessed where Bradley's character would end up as things started unravelling. Too many close-ups of the sumo cyclops baby too. Needed more of DelToro's old effects to jazz this one up maybe. Gorgeous movie. The last 25mins pushed it from a 6 to a 7 but needed to be shorter before that, so as not to note me to death. So clever for it's own good that it got predictable.
Last Night in Soho
(2021)
Predictable. Whiney. Enjoyable for the first half.
1 November 2021
Warning: Spoilers
This movie is beautifully shot. There is no denying it. I actually really enjoyed the first half, excited for what it may become. Then it became Paranoia The Movie. The trailer must have grabbed the best bits. Compared to the other reviews I just did not enjoy it by the end. The lead's whiney whingey kiddie voice grated like cheese by the end, the 'twist' was predictable, and I just wished we had seen Sandy on her revenge spree. THAT would have been amazing.
Never Say Never Again
(1983)
Only a mild Thunder balls-up
15 October 2021
I was ready to hate this ego boost for Sean. You have to remember it was his choice to leave the Bond franchise, so sticking a finger up at his former employers is a bit pathetic. This is not anywhere near as good as Thunderball, but it is enjoyable to a degree. M, Q, and Moneypenny are badly cast, and they haven't spent enough money pennies on the movie as a whole. Loving Kim Basinger & Rowan Atkinson in a Bond though. Worth a watch, but only the once. Never Again. Sorry! Said it lol.
Wanda Sykes: Not Normal
(2019 TV Special)
Ignore the haters!
9 October 2021
I worry about the people that rank this special low. I have never laughed as much watching a comedy special apart from old Robin Williams or Joan Rivers. This and Ali Wong's two specials are the best on Netflix. The rest of stand up I barely laugh as most aren't funny sadly. If you have an issue with politics being in stand up then just don't bother watching any. And if you have a problem with Trump bashing also don't watch any. Luckily comedians are of a higher intelligence, so those that rate this low just do not get why the world hates him.
Van Helsing
(2016–2021)
Deteriorates Like A Vampire That Hasn't Fed
7 October 2021
Loved the first couple of seasons, but it gets more and more out there with time travel, things morphing, extra family members, and so much more bizarre stuff that you just lose track of what made it great. It's substandard tripe by the end. If you haven't watched True Blood or Buffy. Those on repeat are far superior to this.
Digging for the Truth
(2005– )
Irritating voiceover habits
26 September 2021
Sadly the hot presenter Josh has really bad voiceover habits making what could be a good series irritating to watch. Vocally going up and down like a proverbial elevator when he should be speaking with either passion, or emotion just makes the whole thing unwatchable to me. I lasted the first 5mins.
Terrorism Close Calls
(2018– )
Worst Documentary Series On Netflix
19 September 2021
The narrator appears to be talking louder than the actual interesting people interviewed. I would never use him for voiceover as he is monotonous and irritating as well as too loud. He even sounds bored. On top of this it is badly edited, erratic, and to be quite honest... Boring. Never have I been so underwhelmed. Close call? I was playing a mobile game until I realised I had literally completely shut off. Terrible.
Dull As Dishwater
24 July 2019
Probably the worst movie that Netflix has ever made. Even the ghost effects were cheap. Boring script, irritating actress playing an irritating character. You feel nothing for her or the other character, so a complete pointless waste of celluloid
Fortitude
(2015–2018)
Convoluted Coddwallop
15 January 2019
Areas of the first two series were absolute genius... By the third with new characters with bizarre motives it just all became a redundant waste of time & the ending was a massive pointless disappoint. Don't bother... it may be well acted but they ruin it. Could have been wrapped up far better.
Sex Education
(2019–2023)
A Worldwide Education
11 January 2019
I had just pulled an all night movie session off with a friend & as the sun rose thought I would watch an episode of this series. I ended up drinking coffee & bingeing it, because it's that well acted, colourful & human on every level. I can already see reviews criticising making school in the U.K. visually look like the U.S., but if it helps it appeal to a global audience I don't blame them! It works. It's done perfectly with that in mind, and if you are complaining about that then you haven't watched the full beauty & impact that this series should create. There is no racism of any kind, and people are attracted to the person, the way it should be. It puts a spotlight on homophobia & shoo shoos it away for how ridiculous it is & how strong the gay supporting character is, the styles of dress never conform, and it just shows a more beautiful fluidity of beauty, colour, sex, style, and sexual honesty that I wish the whole planet was like. Nit pick what you want people, but in my opinion that's a reflection on you & "The Norm" when I see a fantastic cast with great writing, direction, costume, location, etc... That shows a new ideal town. I wish my high school was like that instead of a stuffy all boys grammar school with bums to the wall when I was outed at 16. Thankyou Sex Education for educating the world on a whole lot more acceptance than just bedroom antics. Watch this show. It's important.
Black Mirror: Bandersnatch
(2018)
Groundhog Day Has Better Plot Twists
9 January 2019
It was all so achingly dull if you look into it... It's great that Netflix can start doing interactive movies like this. I'd like to write my own from teenage years & burgeoning sexuality. The main actor is great, I feel badly for Will Poulter (although what people are saying is true maybe it would be more constructive to show how bad his acting is... complete unemotional plank compared to main actor), and just hope this all leads to new things, but flimsy as hell.
The Struggle Is Real
6 January 2019
What an incredible life... This was a man who had truly loved someone, was truly loved, and had some extreme everchanging views. Genius is always multi-layered & nobody is perfect. In his darkest hours he jumped on a bigoted bandwagon, but any criticism for that should surely be overshadowed by his later work that bowed down to the very people he once discriminated. We live & learn. Even creating his own ideology I find profound. Imagine sitting down and writing that much of your own truth? I think that in itself should be put in a book with a disclaimer (if only many works that exist now had disclaimers). One of the best documentaries I've seen in a long time... A complex ridiculously talented man who stuck by his roots & code. Who cares if he was narcissistic? Sometimes the greatest talents should be allowed a little.
Carrie
(2013)
Not As Good As The Original But Some Parts Superior
4 January 2019
Warning: Spoilers
I hated the first half an hour, constantly comparing it to the original, and by the middle it became okay...
Sissy Spacek is far superior and I have no idea why anyone thought this remake was needed...
However I found this completely worth the watch when it comes to the prom turning sour. The way Chloe plays Carrie as a dark conductor I found astonishingly beautiful in it's own way. That section is too short though. If there is a director's cut it would be so worth it. Gave me goosebumps. So... Not the original, but wow... Highlights.
Sissy Spacek is far superior and I have no idea why anyone thought this remake was needed...
However I found this completely worth the watch when it comes to the prom turning sour. The way Chloe plays Carrie as a dark conductor I found astonishingly beautiful in it's own way. That section is too short though. If there is a director's cut it would be so worth it. Gave me goosebumps. So... Not the original, but wow... Highlights.
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