jacktreese1 Reviews

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (2004)

Forgive me... I thought it was terrific.

[9/10 · 26 March 2007]

My nephew is a big fan of SpongeBob Squarepants, so I popped this in to entertain him one day, and I gotta tell you, I was amazed by the actual quality that this kids feature has to offer.

Basically, after SpongeBob's boss, Mr. Krabs, is accused of stealing the king's crown, SpongeBob and his dumb but lovable friend Patrick Star go on a quest to retrieve it.

Most of the humor is enough to amuse the kids that this film was targeted at. However, there was also the humor that goes way over kids' heads, but even adults can appreciate it without being disgusted of watching children's movies.

Overall, even if you're not a fan of the show at all, check it out. It's humor that isn't too dumb for adults, but not too smart for kids.

And, you never know... maybe it'll make you appreciate the show more. That's what it did for me. But then again, that's just me, and I'm just weird.

Borat (2006)

Walked in not knowing what to expect... walked out trying to catch my breath!

[10/10 · 25 November 2006]

I was in town when Borat opened at the local mall's theater. I decided to go and see it, because I had a lot of free time on my hands and enough money to get a movie ticket. I walked in expecting to be pretty funny, not knowing the laugh-a-minute comedy feast, known as Borat: Cultural Learnings For Make Bnefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. As you know, the story revolves around Borat (Sacha Baron Cohen) and his producer going to the United States to shoot a documentary about American culture. There wasn't a single moment in this film I wasn't laughing. Matter of fact, I was laughing so hard, I actually had to walk out of the theater for a couple minutes because I couldn't control my laughing. I highly recommend Borat to anyone who wants an extremely good laugh at the movies. Easily the funniest film of the year! 10 out of 10

United 93 (2006)

Looked very promising... however...

[7/10 · 29 April 2006]

First of all, my review for this film is NOT based on political belief. It is NOT based on these so-called "conspiracies." It is NOT based on the story itself. It is based on the way it was presented.

We all know the story from that dark day on September 11, 2001. We all know of the story of Flight 93, that crashed in Pennsylvania instead of the intended target of Washington, DC's capital building. Or more.

This film, directed and written by Paul Greengrass (Bourne Supremacy) did intensive research of Flight 93, in every detail from the stories of the flight's doomed passengers, to the black-box recordings. However, this film does have its flaws.

First, this has already been done. Anyone who saw A+E's TV movie Flight 93 knows what I'm talking about.

Second, I disliked the camera work. The way it was done added realism to the film, but it go to a point where it just became tiring and blinded the atmosphere of the movie itself.

Third... well, that's basically it.

Overall, I would only recommend this film to those who wish to see a memorable tribute to those who died on September 11, 2001. I wouldn't recommend this to anyone who feels it's too soon for a 9/11 movie, even though I didn't see any shred of negativity in the film.

6/10

The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (1987)

Wow, this movie sucks.

[3/10 · 11 April 2006]

When I was a kid, maybe 5, I remember my sister would always rent this movie. Somehow, one way or another, I loved it as a child. Recently she bought it on DVD at Wal-Mart. I check it out, because it had been so long.

In the end, I would have rather sat through "Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector." The movie is centered obviously around a bunch of grimy, ugly kids (with names such as Nat Nerd and Greaser Greg) who are total outcasts. They meet a boy named Dodger (right?) and they grow fond of each other. A bunch of other stuff happens, but I was too young to really recall it and I fell asleep while trying to watch it last night.

That's where the 3 out of 10 comes in. It gets a 3 because it just proves that you don't need NyQuil to help you fall asleep at night. Just pop this infernal garbage in and wait it out.

Eight Below (2006)

Spectacular.

[8/10 · 19 March 2006]

After hearing some good things (and after being asked to go), I went and seen Eight Below last night. I was pleased.

Frank Marshall's film is about eight sled dogs who are left behind at a field base, during the harsh winters in Antarctica. However, it's also the story of their owner's quest to get them back.

I do admit, some parts were sorta slow, but everything else was pretty quickly-paced and, might I say, entertaining? Overall, I would recommend this to anyone who wants something a little different for once.

8/10

BloodRayne (2005)

At least it makes Alone in the Dark look like Friday the 13th

[5/10 · 15 January 2006]

After forcing myself to see this movie the other night because a few of my friends are into vampire flicks, I actually thought it could have been worse.

Uwe Boll has made some bad movies, but this one is different because it makes you think at some points in the movie, like "I wonder if Hoodwinked was any good?" See it only if you like the video game.

I would give the movie a 7 out of 10, but that's being too nice. 5 out of 10 means it's mediocre, which it is, at best.

On that note, I think I'm gonna go see if Battlefield Earth 2 is still being planned.

Brokeback Mountain (2005)

Unexpectedly captivating

[6/10 · 7 January 2006]

Brokeback Mountain finally premiered in Rochester last night. Before I continue, I just want to say that before I walked into the theater, my conscience was saying not to go, because of my past view on homosexuality. My idea was that it was wrong and immoral.

However, I still cleared my mind and gave myself the strength to pay attention. And I'm glad I did.

'Cause I wasn't watching another gay-biased film. I wasn't even watching a new work that Ang Lee put out just to say he did something. No, I was watching an engaging, emotional, heart-felt romantic drama. Just with homosexual characters instead of the typical male-female romance.

Heath Ledger as Ennis Del Mar deserves not only an Oscar nod, but a win as well. Jake Gyllenhaal was also good as Jack Twist.

In the end, I learned that homosexuality should be tolerated, and that it's their own choice and no one else's.

ACTING: 10 WRITING: 10 DIRECTION: 10 MUSIC: 10 OVERALL: 10

Walk the Line (2005)

Quite possibly the best picture of 2005.

[10/10 · 12 December 2005]

Last year, us moviegoers were given a biopic about one famous music legend by the name of Ray Charles. Jamie Foxx did commendable work as Mr. Charles. A year later, Hollywood did it again, this time with country legend Johnny Cash. Were they able to pull it off? Absolutely.

Joaquin Phoenix is at his pivotal acting peak as Johnny Cash. People have said it too many times, but I need to remind everyone reading this that his performance deserves the Best Actor Oscar.

The film takes us from Johnny's childhood, filled with horror, to some of his finest live performances, and through his difficulty abstaining from his drug addiction along the way.

Along with Reese Witherspoon's stirring portrayal of a sometimes confused and outreaching June Carter, "Walk the Line" is just what movie goers are looking for. If you haven't seen it yet, see it now.

Pokémon 3 the Movie: Spell of the Unown (2000)

Looking back at my pathetic teenage self...

[10/10 · 25 November 2005]

The other day, I was looking through some old boxes filled with old stuff of mine. In this box was my original NES, some games, and all of my Pokemon stuff. Including each of the films on VHS (well, the first three and Mewtwo Returns).

I remember watching the movies when I was still a Pokemon passionate, and wanted to see if I could get that same rush still, four years later.

Well, with the first two, no chance. The third one, Pokemon 3: The Movie, however, was different.

Again, this review is coming from an 18 year old high school graduate. And even four years later, Pokemon 3 still delivered the thrills.

Loaded with excellent animation, some tense battle scenes (Charizard vs. Entei, anyone?), and a heartwarming theme that children can embrace, I recommend Pokemon 3 to anyone who wishes to rediscover their childhood or for anyone who is just up for some great animation.

9/10

Serenity (2005)

A good movie in its own right.

[9/10 · 15 November 2005]

Before I write this review, I would just like to point out that I have had very little faith in the sci-fi part of the film industry. Lately, sci-fi has become dull, unoriginal, and pale ever since the Matrix trilogy concluded in 2003 and the Star Wars saga came to a close this past summer.

When this movie came out, I initially had no interest in the film at all. I had only seen a few episodes of Firefly, which I'm guessing is the series this is based upon. I thought the film would be about as boring as half of the films Hollywood pumped out this year.

Boy, was I wrong.

Right from the beginning, I was drawn in. Between the well-crafted special effects and the accomplished acting by Nathan Fillon and Summer Glau, and even the directing job by Joss Whedon (who also wrote), made this a fun ride.

Now to the script. Serenity is about Capt. Reynolds evading every move by an alliance leader who wants to take in River Tam, a young beautiful girl with extraordinary powers. As her powers become clearer to Reynold's Serenity crew, the crew questions her power and the alliance.

For fun's sake, see Serenity.

9/10

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)

The end of a visionary saga (CONTAINS SPOILERS)

[10/10 · 28 May 2005]

After 28 long years of box office success, the Star Wars saga has finally reached its end. In 1977, George Lucas would release a film that has been considered to be the most successful film series of all time.

That film was called "Star Wars." In recent years, buffs may recall the release of two prequels that were a little less than "glorious." Those prequels were Episodes I and II, titled "The Phantom Menace" and "Attack of the Clones," respectively. (Reviewer's note: My reviews for all of the Star Wars films begin tomorrow, starting with "The Phantom Menace" and ending with "Return of the Jedi.") The last prequel, and last film in the saga, was released last Thursday, reeling in what I could imagine to be well over $100 Million by now.

Once again, I must stress this point out: This review will contain several spoilers, as I will be going in-depth with this review.

The Clone Wars are ending after three years. Obi-Wan Kenobi (McGregor), now a Jedi Master, has been sent by the Republic to bring down Separatists Count Dooku (Christopher Lee) and Droid General Grievous. However, Obi-Wan and Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker (Christensen) have learned a horrid secret--Chancellor Palpatine (Ian McDarmid) is corrupt and Coruscant is under attack! In the beginning dog fight, there is a wild, engaging dogfight where we learn Obi-Wan and Anakin are trying to rescue Palpatine, who has been captured by Count Dooku. When Obi-Wan is knocked out of battle by Dooku, Anakin fights him to the death until Dooku is brought down and killed by Anakin. This is where the corrupt mind of Palpatine comes into play.

Anakin is growing closer and closer to the dark side of the force. Little by little, Palpatine brings the Republic to an Empirical regime, and as Obi-Wan takes off to go after Grievous, Palpatine requests to speak with Anakin several times. He becomes closer to Palpatine, but while getting closer, he has nightmares of his pregnant wife-in-secret, Senator Padme Amidala (Portman), dying during childbirth.

However, as Anakin gets closer to Palpatine and his teachings, he reveals to Anakin that he knows the force--and the ways to the dark side and how to use it to advantage. Anakin reports this to the Jedi Council, and Mace Windu (Samuel L. Jackson) places Palpatine under arrest. Palpatine is captivated by the dark side, and fights Mace Windu in battle.

Anakin arrives in time to see Palpatine down on the ground, wickedly old-looking because of the dark side. Anakin obeys Palpatine's order over Mace's orders--and Mace Windu dies in glory, in an attempt to save the Republic.

Anakin is in a panic, knowing he has broken the Jedi code by killing another Jedi. So Palpatine offers a chance to teach and train Anakin the ways of the dark side. Anakin bows down and accepts. He is dubbed "Lord Vader." As a code to all of those of the dark side, the Jedi begin to drop like flies until only two good Jedi are left: Yoda (Frank Oz), and Obi-Wan. Yoda feels a strong disturbance within the Force, and sees visions of Anakin joining the dark side. Obi-Wan doesn't believe it, until he sees it on the recorded security holograms. Padme is heartbroken by hearing it as well.

Kenobi has no choice at this point but to face Anakin--who has been like a brother to him--and fight him to destroy the evil inside.

And through all of this, Palpatine crowns himself Emperor and gets rid of the old Republic and begins a new Galactic Empire.

All I can say is this is the most intense of the Star Wars films, and the most mature. The movie blends drama, suspense, and the same IL' Galactic fighting we are used to.

There's even some familiar faces from past films, including a brief screen second of Jar-Jar Binks. We also see Chewbacca, with Peter Mayhew proudly returning to the screen once more.

And who could forget, Darth Vader? MOVIE NOTE: When I said this is the most intense of the Star Wars films, I meant it. This is a Star Wars film more well-suited for the 13 and older crowd. Maybe I'm just exaggerating.

FINAL THOUGHT: When the film began, people stood up and cheered. It was cool! Hoever, I found myself in tears in the last half hour. Not only because of the movie, but because of the fact that this is it, there's no more new Star Wars. So thank you, George Lucas, for the excellent films, and goodbye forever, Star Wars! OVERALL: 10 OUT OF 10

Blue Collar TV (2004–2006)

Couldn't ask for more...

[19 September 2004]

When I first saw Blue Collar Comedy Tour, I found it to be quite possibly the funniest film ever. It still is.

When I heard about this show, I expected it to be nothing more than skits revolving around the jokes the guys made in BCCT... I was right, and then some!

This is indeed a rednecked SNL/MadTV, and I couldn't have it any other way.

From sketches including Rescue 911 to The REAL Bachelor, I can never really stop laughing when I watch this show.

My friends feel that this show sold out the Blue Collar Comedy guys quicker than Metallica. I disagree. If anything, this show glorified how much redneck humor rules.

If you haven't watched Blue Collar TV, I recommend you do. I'm definitely buying Season One when the DVD is released.

10/10

The Passion of the Christ (2004)

Excellent, Graphic, and Very Emotional Experience!

[10/10 · 27 February 2004]

Is it anti-semetic? Nope.

Is it graphic and violent? Yeah.

Is it emotionally powerful? Yes.

Is it good? Definetly.

The Passion of the Christ, the controversial biblical epic directed by Mel Gibson, is perhaps the best film of 2004. The film stars Jim Caviezel as the Christ.

The story follows Christ in his last 12 hours of physical life. The story of Christ's last hours are beautifully, graphically, yet understanably told.

I do not see where any of the anti-semitism arises from this film. It would seem as though rabbis are trying to stop certain people from seeing this excellent movie.

The violence is way overdone with reason. Every whip to his back, every amount of torture he suffered was for us. I believe this moral lesson of the movie: Dying was his reason for living.

The film is impossible to sit through without wincing once. This is true. I would wince in my seat each time Christ was whipped. It pained me to watch. In the end though, Passion of the Christ was very enlightening. I broke down crying a half four after watching this movie because of how powerful it is. It hits you hard.

To those who can't handle violence: Jesus took a physical beating for us. So why not take an emotional pounding for your own sake?

It'll change your life. It changed mine.

I recommend this film to everyone.