TVM-Liveforever Reviews

Grimm's Fairy Tales for Adults (1969)

Three classic tales, quite literally Exposed!

[7/10 · 22 May 2015]

Essentially this is a far more adult retelling of the classic fairy tales- Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty, with some "slight" deviations- the wicked queen eats Snow White's supposed lady bits, Sleeping Beauty needs a lot more than a kiss to "fully" awaken and Cinderella's evil stepsisters actually cut off parts of there feet.

Well what can be said about this, a strange mix of nudity, sex, comedy and some very mild gore, however what comes over far more is the light moments, its actually quite funny at times. The story follows two brothers going through the forest, they first find Snow White, then stumble into what appears to be an orgy where everyone's out cold including Sleeping Beauty herself and finally Cinderella. The story zips along at a fair old pace with each situation becoming more outrageous and ridiculous as it goes, from animals trying to get it on with Ms White to her and the brothers sucking on a cows udders (its a very bizarre scene). Usually acting, direction, writing and all other technical aspects of a film would be up for review but in such a picture to look to seriously at such a film would be pointless and frankly stupid, because all of its absurdities add to the charm of it all.

Unbelievably the Director Of Public Prosecutions here in the UK decided in its "wisdom" that this totally harmless film should be added to the Section 3 nasty list, meaning it could be seized by the police as obscene, because of violence not sex or nudity shockingly, shamefully ridiculous. It's a fun, silly little film that entertains through its bizarre story and set-pieces, although certainly not for all tastes, but if cult audiences take it for what it is go along for the ride and they'll be thoroughly entertained.

Honeymoon Horror (1982)

If you're on your honeymoon, stay away from "Lovers Island"

[6/10 · 10 May 2015]

At a newly re-opened honeymoon lodge "Lovers Island" someone is stalking and killing the female newlyweds.

Decent if completely unmemorable slasher. The idea is fine, a killer lurking in the shadows killing the women on a remote island, but there are too many problems for it to become anything other than average. The acting is fairly stilted and even dramatically poor at times, the women are best but some of the males are just a bit too unbelievable. The film does create a bit of tension and does have a creepy atmosphere, however this is killed off along with some decent pacing, every time we see the stupid and totally unnecessary sheriff, its played for comic relief but doesn't work and would've been better not in the film. The mystery of the killer is not a mystery its obvious from the very first scene who our killer will be & is no shock when we see him. The low-budget is clear particularly in the ineffective gore sequences that don't really convince, although they are a little fun at times.

Unbelievably this was a Section 3 nasty here in the UK meaning it could be seized by the police, why?, that's anyone guess. The tag-line of- Why kill all the women- doesn't really mean a thing and it never becomes clear why, the best thing to do is don't think too much, just sit down for 90mins and enjoy it as much as you can.

G.B.H. (1983)

"More Brutal" than The Long Good Friday...REALLY?

[6/10 · 3 May 2015]

Donavon is released from prison and is hired as a bouncer to protect a nightclub from a violent London gang.

Obscure early British shot on video gang thriller that is much better than you might think. Acting is quite shaky to say the least, some of the direction/shot choices is on a par with home movies and the less said about the editing the better, but somehow none of that matters because it remains a watchable and fairly entertaining low-budget film. Writing has some wonderfully funny lines- "I didn't know this was a gay bar, it's not, what about those 2 p**fs at the end of the bar then" brilliant, the pic is also littered with fairly laughable plot points like falling in love after a couple of hours, being beaten into a pulp and then in the next scene walking around without a mark on them. The romance is very funny/ridiculous but adds to the overall charm of it all as does the lounge music that plays throughout, its not bad but doesn't fit with the violent scenes on screen. The violence itself is fairly entertaining in an unconvincing way, a lot of it misses its mark but there is a couple of graphic shots that are a bit more convincing and the final scenes are surprisingly very good.

As far as I'm aware this has only ever had one release on the World Of Video 2000 tape label in 1983 with the tagline more brutal than The Long Good Friday, well not quite, this release was added to the Section 3 nasties list of seize-able titles here in the UK, but the film is a hell of a lot better than it has any right to be. Obviously made with little money & resources but by people who were out to make as entertaining a film as they could and were as successful as they could've hoped.

Enter the Devil (1972)

Enter The "very average" Devil

[6/10 · 28 April 2015]

A sheriff investigates people begin to disappear and turn up dead, unknown to him a strange satanic cult called the Penitenties seem to be responsible.

Highly obscure horror/western, but a fairly watchable if undemanding picture. Story goes along at a pretty slow but steady pace with a few twists within it, including the lead (or what I thought was the lead) making a surprise exit. Acting is decent but nothing exceptional, as is the direction by Frank Dobbs. The rural, sparse Texan setting however is beautiful and strangely adds to the creepy undercurrent of tension in the cult scenes and is does manage (rarely) a modicum of suspense.

A decent but just very average movie that will pass the 80-odd minutes pleasantly enough just don't expect anything too great if you can get hold of it.

Shockingly this non-graphic, non-gory film was placed on the section 3 nasty list here in the UK, how anyone in a position of power at the DPP or police could've watch this on video in the early 80's and thought wow this should be banned is not only pathetic but down right stupidity.

The Black Room (1982)

Don't date anyone in the Black Room

[7/10 · 17 April 2015]

A man rents a room a brother & sister so he can have extramarital affairs away from his own house, however his landlords are draining the blood from everyone who enters the room.

An extremely dark and original take on the vampire genre. Set in the modern day (1981 when it was made) unlike many vampire movies of the time, the setting does give it much more credibility than its Gothic counterparts. The draining sequences are very dramatic, no fangs here but a massive machine which pumps out the blood into some very gory scenes. The performances are a lot better than you might think, the 4 leads are surprisingly good as is most of the supporting cast. The second half of the movie is great, tension mounts very well, the pace improves and the last 10-15mins are superb and quite scary at times. The film does have a couple of issues though, in the first half pacing is quite sluggish, as the set up sequences to key scenes take an age and at times fail at keeping the viewers attention, editing is also quite strange at the beginning (although that could just have been the copy I watched 1983 UK VHS).

Overall a very good surprising watch, if you enjoy weird fairly gory horror there should be plenty for you to enjoy here. Interestingly this quite rare horror was put onto the DPP's section 3 list here in the UK (meaning the police could seize it from the shelves), a real shame as this well made little horror didn't deserve the negative attention it got.

Night of the Howling Beast (1975)

Paul Naschy versus the Yeti

[5/10 · 14 April 2015]

A professor sets out to find the Yeti and organises an expedition to Tibet however a member of the team is attacked by a strange creature and is turned into a werewolf. One by one the expedition is killed with only the professor's daughter the only survivor ands it is she who will witness the Werewolf and the Yeti's life and death struggle.

The Werewolf And The Yeti as it was called here in the UK starts off as a pretty standard adventure/horror but gets more & more silly as it goes along. The adventure side of the story is far more interesting and far more possibilities than the horror, but its the weaker story aspect that wins out in the end & that is a shame. Paul Naschy plays the werewolf (for the 7th time) and is actually OK, the others are also fine but no more, Vandessa has to seen she's hilarious, the violence is hardly extreme or graphic but does have a skin peeling scene that is a little bit stronger and the "battle" between the 2 title characters is a little but disappointing. The pace is what really hurts the film though, first half is desperately slow at times and will challenge all but the hardiest Euro horror fans and the dubbing is also terrible.

Although a video nasty this is hardly your average "gore flick" and those looking for that will be disappointed if you can find this very rare movie. Overall watchable but no more.

Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker (1981)

She was lonely, he was all she had & no-one will take him from her, and live...

[8/10 · 30 March 2015]

When his parents are tragically killed Billy goes to live with his aunt who appears to be fixated on keeping him with her at all costs. When the aunt kills a man who won't sleep with her the police detective investigating suspect the aunt is protecting Billy who he thinks was having a relationship with Billy.

An incredibly dark thriller with some very strange events. Bo Svenson who plays the lead cop on the case has to be one of the most unlikeable characters in horror film history, he is so unpleasantly homophobic/sexist/racist it makes it quite difficult to watch. Susan Tyrrell as the psycho aunt is brilliant and plays her with a truly demented edge, Jimmy McNichol as Billy and Julia Duffy as Julie are also very good. Writing overall is good, the character aunt Cheryl story's come out bit by bit and is always interesting(especially her relationship with Billy) as is the climax, but the detective story is so deliberately offensive it does undermine some of the story. The make-up effects are very good, the opening scene is impressive as is the violent set-pieces at the end. The atmosphere is excellent, the tension mounts and builds to a very strong finale.

Not a gory or exploitative horror but a well made and brilliantly put together picture. How this well thought of film was banned as a video nasty and then rejected by the BBFC is astounding, this does deserve a release on DVD it has been on the shelf too long.

Human Experiments (1979)

Human Experiments - OUTRAGOUS!!! as a Video Nasty

[7/10 · 18 March 2015]

Rachel Foster is wrongly imprisoned for the murder of an entire family, once in prison however she is subjected to mind altering experiments at the hands of the prison psychiatrist with results.

A good women in prison movie with some strong points. The story is nothing special but is handled well, and has enough movement within the story to hold interest. Performances are all pretty good, Linda Haynes in the lead as Rachel gives a very strong portrayal of the innocent prisoner, Aldo Ray & Geoffrey Lewis are also strong in their roles. There are also some very good sequences within the film including, the scene where Rachel is losing her mind and a hoard of insects are coming in to her cell and she then crawls her way through the ducting it's a strong and commanding scene. The main problem with the film though is it's pace, although the story is OK the pace of the film is sometimes so slow it feels it's taking a age to develop and the audience may start to drift off.

This is not a violent or gruesome film, there is a scene at the beginning where you see a family who have been shot and later in the film you see a woman hanging, these are the two most violent things in the film and are both aftermath shots, so how this relatively mild W.I.P. movie ever got caught up the Video Nasty scare here in the UK really is shocking and it is something it most certainly didn't deserve. If you can see this pretty rare film give it a watch it isn't bad.