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Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)
NEVER, in ALL MY LIFE, have I been more GENUINELY ANGRY at a movie.
How this script made it past everyone at Disney I'll never know. What happened to the Star Wars that told a coherent story and focused on characters that we truly cared about?
Here, we have a ridiculous stew of new pawns thrown into the mix who end up amounting to nothing. The characters we do care about are under-utilized. Phasma has an underwhelming death after once again being absolutely worthless and without consequence. The other two deaths in the film are that of the two female characters who are introduced with minimal development. And... how did Luke die? He just decided to drift off into oblivion in the same fashion as Yoda? This made sense for Yoda in Return of the Jedi as he was way beyond his years. But Luke here basically just commits suicide.
Genuine drama and momentum is traded in for cheap twists and a non-stop urge to be humorous instead of taking itself seriously. Several of the jokes are cringe-worthy, as if a room full of aspiring comics sat around and said "Hey, wouldn't this be kinda funny if we had this character do this?!" and then they just included every possible outlet for humor with zero discretion. Trading in fluid and impactful story-telling for an overabundance of cheap laughs... something that no Star Wars movie til now has dared to do.
I was genuinely excited to explore the true nature of The Force in this installment, but I was sorely mistaken in that department as well. The dialog during the training scenes is simplistic, rehashed from The Empire Strikes Back, but in a dumbed-down way. No new or innovative ideas are brought up, and as Luke trains Rey, he does so with an air of mockery. To those who have found actual insight, emotion, and philosophical resonance in The Force, the way this movie handles the subject is beyond insulting.
Also- I understand Leia is strong with the Force- but are we really supposed to believe that Jedi can survive being THROWN INTO OUTER SPACE now?? Where do we draw the line? These are human characters we're dealing with, but Mr. Johnson apparently has no boundaries.
And his final shot? A boy who we have NEVER SEEN BEFORE. I understand the meaning behind it- to say that anyone can be force-sensitive- but really?! For me, Star Wars has always been about the characters. So when one considers the closing shot of the movie (which has, in other Star Wars films, always been highly poignant) to be a RANDOM BOY... instead of a character that we're actually invested in... you'll see why I am upset.
Adding even more questions to the list of unanswered mysteries introduced in The Force Awakens, this episode has me seriously concerned for the culminating chapter of this trilogy. Best of luck to Abrams in salvaging the story he set out to tell, as The Last Jedi has left it in a very puzzling and disappointing place.
Horse Feathers (1932)
One of the Funniest Movies of All Time
Hilarious! This film is truly one of the greatest comedies ever made. And, if ranking on a scale of satirical over-the-top comedies, this is definitely in the top 5. Save only Duck Soup, this is the best Marx Brothers film in terms of the laughs. It's not meant to be taken seriously so all you have to do while watching is release your mind from the real world and suspend your disbelief to its max.
I suppose I feel a special connection with this film, mostly because I watch it and think this is the exact same kind of film that me and my friends would make. I know that, had I lived in the 30's and been fortunate enough to be a Marx, I would have been right up there with them. This is the film that really brings you in and makes you form a special relationship with the Marxes. "Horse Feathers" makes you feel like you're part of the action and incredibly close to the characters as though you are right there in the scene with them.
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
Not Only The Best In The Series; Also One Of The Best In The Genre
Let me just tell you this: I love Spider-Man 2. Love it, love it, love it. I always have loved it, and undoubtedly always will. Now, let me tell you why I love it.
First of all, it starts off with the characters already developed and established. This means no time is wasted in explaining who the people are. The introduction of how Peter Parker became Spider-Man has already been told, which gives the film the ability to begin at an already-quickened pace, which it definitely takes advantage of. From the minute the narrative starts, you as a viewer are automatically hooked. This movie does not fail to get your attention... unless you have really bad ADHD.
Also added into this film that are missing in most superhero films: emotions. Tons and tons of emotions. Whether it be the ill-fated love between Peter and Mary Jane, the tense rivalry between Peter and Harry, or the saddened yet insightful words of Aunt May, this film gets right down into the hearts of the people who matter most. The movie doesn't overuse action or stunts; it uses them as a powerful compliment to the even more powerful storyline.
Another point that must be observed is the pure awesomeness of the villain. Alfred Molina as Doctor Octopus is, in my mind, the quintessential comic book super-villain now ever since I've seen this film. His performance is spectacular and the character is just wonderful. I mean, once you catch just a glimpse of Doc Oc and his four mechanical legs, that picture will stay in the back of your mind for at least two months, give or take. He's also a superb character because he has such a powerful story and strong personality, which is clearly illustrated before he becomes Doc Oc. The reason why I love him so much as a villain is because he is human, and he's not completely evil at heart. It's a clear example of how good, intelligent people can be driven away and turned into something they're not, but then also deals with the importance of redemption.
I won't give away too much more, since the movie really is worth seeing. When viewed, in my mind, I can't find anything that a viewer would find wrong or out of place. It's a fun, light-hearted film with a strong message and deep emotional scenes. There's also great action and comedy throughout. The acting is terrific on everyone's part, from the lead role down to every little extra you find in an elevator or on an elevated train. Also, with a villain whom you can feel compassion for and a hero you can really connect with, this movie can be related to pretty much anyone's own life.
The bottom line is... if you've had troubles in your life, you'll be able to connect with it. If you've ever been unsure of who you are or what you're supposed to be doing, you'll be able to connect with it. And if you've ever given up a dream to do what's right, you'll be able to connect with it. And if you haven't experienced any of those things, good for you. Watch the film for the fun of it. It's one hell of a ride. :)
Happy Gilmore (1996)
I'd say this is probably the funniest movie of all time.
As far as comedy goes, this is the best! It honestly does not get better than Happy Gilmore. I don't think I've ever laughed as hard in a movie! Even after seeing it at least five times, it stay makes me laugh out loud!
A word of advice: This is a movie to watch with a group of people who also like to laugh. It will be a lot more enjoyable the more you laugh and the more you know other people think it's funny too. That being said, it's not the type of movie you'd want to watch if you're looking for some deep message. It's just a simple story about a new golfer with anger management issues who tries to win back his grandmother's house. But it is HILARIOUS.
To demonstrate the type of humor used throughout the film, imagine a quiet, peaceful golf course filled with proper people there to enjoy the sport. And then there's Happy. He comes to the course dressed like a bum, has no idea what he's doing, and treats the game as if no one were watching. For example, he frequently gets mad when the ball does not go in the hole. Once, in my favorite scene, he gets down on the ground next to the ball and says, "SON OF A B**** BALL, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST GO TO YOUR HOME?! THAT'S YOUR HOME! ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME?! ANSWER ME!" and then begins freaking out even more.
So, I guess, if you don't like that kind of humor, this movie's not for you. But if you think that it'd be funny to watch a psycho golf player on the course and dig an inspiring story of love and determination on the side, check this out. It's become a classic in my mind, and out of all the great comedies I've seen, none of them seem to compare with this one.
Adam Sandler, you are a genius.
With love,
Simba Jackson
Zookeeper (2011)
It's a COMEDY
I'm extremely shocked at the reviews for this movie. I mean, I know most films like this will only get a 5 or 6 out of ten rating. But an average of 3.7? I don't think so!
I thought this movie was very good. It had something for everyone, that is, if everyone was willing to be a little more open-minded. Not all the humor was incredibly hilarious, but most of it was very much laughable. Especially the scene with the gorilla at TGI Friday's! One of the funniest scenes I've seen in modern movies.
And that wasn't the only funny part. This movie is loaded with good comedy! I don't know what everyone else is smoking, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. It even throws in a twist in the plot with the main character actually getting the girl and then having to choose between her and another.
Also, I'm an animal lover so this film was just awesome for me. Talking animals are the best! In fact, yesterday a dog followed me home, and I was still thinking about this movie, so I tried talking to the dog just in case it talked back.
So, all in all, this is a great family movie and it should make you laugh. I'll put it this way, if you don't laugh at least once in this movie, you have no sense of humor. People with a sense of humor will be able to laugh at almost anything, and most definitely this movie.
So please, don't listen to all the bad reviews. Give this movie a shot and you'll probably enjoy it. Just understand, IT'S A COMEDY.
With love,
Simba Jackson
Water for Elephants (2011)
The best circus movie I've ever seen.
Well, maybe that's because it's the only circus movie I can think of off the top of my head. But nonetheless, a great film. It's the perfect length, the perfect amount of action, the perfect mix of drama and comic relief, and overall, it's got a good story.
Really well put together. For the type of movie it is, it's really quite impressive. I mean, obviously it's not the most exciting story in the world. It's a story of a troubled man who finds work and falls in love at the circus. But even with that limited plot, the filmmakers did an excellent job of bringing the movie to life and making you feel like you're part of the scene.
It's definitely near the top of my list as far as 2011 movies go, but I don't expect it to be much of a classic. I'm thinking it'll turn into one of those movies that time just blows over into obscurity, but if discovered by a new generation, they'd definitely enjoy it.
With love,
Simba Jackson
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (2011)
A fun-filled joy ride. Way better than people make it out to be.
This movie is way better than people say it is.
That is, if you're not expecting it to be a huge epic or a completely innovative work that'll keep you thinking. It's not meant to be that. It's a fun, good old adventure.
And it's in the spirit of the classic adventure film that Pirates 4 strives. The action isn't overdone, but there's just enough that it'll keep you alert. The conflict of the story also isn't overdone, which is a huge relief from the last two. I mean, don't get me wrong, I loved the last two installments. But after the incredibly complex story of Beckett and Davy Jones, it just feels right that it goes back to the basics.
Three ambitious parties all searching for the fountain of youth. Simple. Understandable. Adventurous. The perfect plot for the fourth installment.
Of course, however, the first viewing will most likely be A LITTLE disappointing. That's just because it's a sequel and I, for one, am always somewhat disappointed with a sequel the first time I see it. It's been that way with pretty much every big franchise I can think of. But then, once you get past that (which you will), you'll realize it fits quite nicely into the series and ought to be watched at least a second time or a third.
So, in conclusion, it's not that innovative epic or the high point in the series. What it is, is a fun movie filled with laughter, love, and the many other things that make movies great. Don't criticize it if it wasn't everything you expected. If it made you smile, then it's a good movie. Unless you just like to complain.
And don't forget, there will be two more installments added before the franchise is done, so don't be disappointed that it's not as epic as the last two. It's not supposed to be the high point in the series. But it is entertaining. I'd definitely rank it as one of the best movies of the year.
And, oh yeah, I forget to mention the best part. CAPTAIN JACK IS BACK! WOO! YEAH! JOHNNY DEPP ROCKS! GO JACK SPARROW! GO JACK SPARROW! JACK SPARROW!
With love,
Simba Jackson
Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)
Worst film of the year...
Well, I went into the theater with low expectations. Even then, this film disappointed me beyond belief. It was even worse than the previous two. Wait, maybe that was because it was almost exactly the same as the previous two.
Now, if you're someone who goes to a movie and looks for nothing but action, I have four words for you: GO SEE THIS MOVIE. You'll love it. The whole thing is action, and I must admit the action is top-notch.
However, if you're someone who actually appreciates the art of cinema, and looks for emotions and good plot line when watching a picture, you will probably agree that Transformers 3 sucks. That's because there is no emotional buildup, no climax, no real characters, no meaning, and overall no point. It's robots fighting. That's it.
Firstly, the characters, which are arguably the most important factor of a movie, are not developed AT ALL. I guess you could say that they developed them in the first two, and so we're already supposed to know who they are. Well, we do know who they are, but that's about it. Many of the characters have about ten lines of dialogue throughout the whole thing, or so it seems. This means that whenever something really "climatic" happens, no one cares anyway since we barely know the characters. Frankly, I didn't even care if a main character was about to die, because the film didn't touch on the character's personalities at all. Instead, the whole thing is constant action with a FEW dialogue scenes, which are pretty pathetic as well.
Secondly, if you find pointless action boring, you will bored the hell out of this movie. The final battle in Chicago takes, I'd say, a good 45 minutes. The first 15 were actually really entertaining. If it would've stopped there, I actually would've given the movie a better rating. But no... it drags on for several eternities. Each time you think it's going to end, they trick you and add in another obstacle and another cheesy, slow motion thing that's supposed to be climactic and emotional. Well, like I said, no one cares anyway because everyone's going, "Who is this guy again?"
The bottom line is, this movie sucks. If you want a good, modern action series with an equal amount of good story, I would suggest the Pirates of the Caribbean or the Batman movies. Also check out Source Code and Inception, two of the most innovative movies that have come out for awhile.
With love,
Simba Jackson
The Bourne Identity (2002)
Split in two over this one... pretty good spy film... yet it almost put me to sleep...
I really lean both ways when it comes to this one. One part of me says, "Wow, this is a great movie with a cool plot!" and the other side says, "I'd rather be sleeping in my bed than sleeping through this movie."
First, the good: It's realistic. It's got cool locations and the action is 100% real (as in no CGI).
Then, the not so good: There's really not too much dialogue, and consequently not too much sympathy or empathy that goes to the characters. I have about the same amount of sympathy for a pedestrian on the street as I do for Jason Bourne in this movie. And instead of adding more dialogue or character development, they fill the movie with long, unnecessary shots of the locations and scenery. They show the characters doing pointless busy work all the time that really doesn't need to be shown on film! Probably because they couldn't think of anything else to fill the gaps!
And plus, it could've been over in a half hour. It's a simple story. And they kept it simple. And by doing so, they made it very boring. I'd say this is, without a doubt, the slowest action movie I've ever seen. But the ending DOES make you want to come back and see the sequels.
So, there you have it. My final advice is, if you haven't seen it, see it. It'll be a classic in the world of action movies someday... it's just a little slow. Don't watch it with high expectations, though. Like I said, it's slow. Should be called "The Bored Identity."
With love,
Simba Jackson