axel335 Reviews

Daniel the Wizard (2004)

-437

[1/10 · 19 July 2023]

I have counted all the sillyness in this "film" and I have found out that the correct score for this "film" should not be 1 but -437. Its really that bad.

This film is awful in any way a movie can be awful. The "film" tells the story of a very bad and unintressting pop singer called Daniel. He cant sing, he looks dreadful, hes a lousy actor. Why he is pupular is beyond me. Besides long and boring concert clips there is an insane story of three bad guys wanna kill Daniel for unknown reason. And it that wasnt silly enough Daniels grandpas ghosts comes along and say stupid things !!!

This creation is so bad it needs to be seen to be believed. Ulli Lommel is the heir of Ed Wood.

Many scenes in this "film" is so bad its funny. The ending could he the worst in cinematografic history and also hilariously funny

I know it can be hard to find a copy but its woth it! Its a new level of badness in here!

I highly recommend this one for lovers of really, really, really bad films.

Fateful Findings (2013)

A combo of Ed Wood and Dingo Pictures, and its NOT a good idea

[1/10 · 9 April 2023]

This movies is awful and hilariously so. I hadn't laughed as much as I did at a movie in a long time. This movies is so bad that its actualy very interesting how one could make such a bad movie. Even on purpose.

Every single scene in this movie is bad och not in the same way all the time. Ed Wood, I mean Neil Breen, comes up with new mistakes all the time.

The plot is almost impossible to follow. I'm not sure there even was a script. I think Neil had some kind of idea what the movie should be about but failed miserably to convey that to the audience.

Neil is truly a rightful heir to Ed Wood's throne. He does the same kind of truly awful movies without humour and he, like his master Ed Wood, has no idea what's going on or what they're doing.

This is one of the weirdest films you can see. Ever.

It's a disaster if you view it as a normal movie and a masterpice if you view it as a bad one. Strongly recommend to all lovers of bad movies.

1 or 10 stars. It's up for you to decide.

La mujer que hablaba con los muertos (2014)

A Spanish Ed Wood

[1/10 · 31 January 2023]

This movie is awesome. It carries the tradition of the great Ed Wood into the future. I really didn't know movies like this were still being made in modern times.

The genius behind this movie manage to do everything terribly wrong. The script is nonsens, the dialogen is hilarious, the actors seems to have been picked up randomly from the streets. The music can be one of the worst and most unappropriate I have ever heard. It's awful.

No one has any idea whats going on. Not the director, not the actors and certainly not the audience.

Most scenes are great fun. We laughed through the whole movie. The demon that appears in the end is super lame. Just lazy and ugly.

All in all, this is great fun if you enjoy so bad it's good movies. I recommend this one to all of you C movie lovers out there.

I Believe in Santa (2022)

This is a great movie..... If you are a total moron

[1/10 · 25 December 2022]

Where do i start? At first i was convinced this was a parody. I couldn't really understand that something could be this bad without being a parody. After about 10 minutes i realized that it probably wasn't a parody. The director really thought this was the way the movie would look like.

I have seen many thousands really, really bad movies. Some are boring (like many bad love stories), some are crazy fun (Troll2, Birdemic). This movies is however different. The male character has sever mental problems and act like a 5 yo. The female character looks like a serial killer with wild, starring eyes. If i dated someone who looked like that i would move out of the relationship very fast.

The story is so bizarre that its hurts my brain to think about that someone actually wrote a script this way. But someone actually did. The story is that of the serial killer looking lady dates a man who actually believes Santa Claus is real!! No sane woman would date that guy. He's the kind of guy anyone would stay far away from.

Nothing makes any sense. The movies is cheesy and slippery. It looks like a cheap commercial. The idea of a grown up man believe in Santa Claus is so redicolous that its hard to take in. The end is so awful that it can actually be the worst ending in cinematic history.

Apart from some very funny scenes the movie is boring. It has long, boring scenes with the couple discussing boring, pseudo religious mumbo jumbo.

I think this is one of the worst movies ever made. I'm sure this can be a cult classic like Troll2 och Birdemic in the future.

I could recommend this movies to someone that likes extremely bad movies and can laugh at all the silliness. For all you other guys out there: stay away if you wanna keep your mental health intact.

The Evil Dead (1981)

Probably a great movies back in 1981. Just silly now

[2/10 · 31 October 2022]

I saw this movie when it came in 1981 and thought it was awesome. Now when im 55 i saw it again and i see a really cheese and silly movie. The actors are lousy, the camerawork is amaturish, the music is annoying, the plot is non existent. At times its supersilly and some scenes are laught out loud bad.

I have seen this concept done so much better in later movies over the years. This movie has really not stand the test of time. Its really, really, really, really bad.

I guess some reviers havent seen this movie in later years but remember how great they thought it was back then when they where kids. I thought so too before i watch it last nigh.

A tips: watch it now and you will certainly not think its a great movie.

Neron (2016)

Very funny

[1/10 · 30 May 2022]

Super funny

I love this movie. Its so much fun. Not a single part of this movie make any sense. The plot holes are enormous. The actors are one-demineional,. The script is totally confused. Its a total mess

There are many scenese in this so called movie that is LOL bad. Me and my son laughed so hard at the worst part of this crapfest. I saw on imdb that there where two morons that direct this crap. Where they in some kind of coma or high?

I recommend this awul/superfun movie to all the lovers of really bad movies out there.

Scream (I) (2022)

Now this is a bad movie

[1/10 · 16 February 2022]

I went to see this movie with my son and hoped it would be a descent movie. I like the old ones from the 90s. I think they were good and entertaining and made something new out an old and tired genre.

I assume the director of this "movie" intended to update the movie with things that didn't exist in the 90s like mobile phones and GPS but the movie stills feels very much stuck in the 90s.

In a bad way that is.

What was cool 1996 is not necessarily cool today, This movies is certainly not cool. At all.

I feel embarrassed watching this dog of a movie. When we saw it a cinema in central Stockholm I saw at least 10 people walking out of the cinema. I am surprised it wasn't more.

The actors were totally worthless, the script doesn't make any sense, the ending is the most pathetic and useless ending in the history of cinematography. I mean, come on, they could have come up with ANYTHING and it would have been better than this crap.

The "movie" is not scary at all, there are some lazy jump scares, some silly infantile attempt to humour but it failed miserably. The movie is too long which makes it slow and boring.

Don't even get me started on the script and the plot holes, There are plot holes here greater than the pacific ocean. The guy that wrote this drivel should drive a bus instead....

This is truly a horror movie but not in the way the director thought. This movie is a horror in badness, laziness, "we put some crap together, the kids will watch it anyway" bad.

Stay far away from this awful so called "movie" unless you wanna feel embarrassed, bored to death and loose two hours of your life like i did.

Scream (why not Scream 5, you morons?) is an utterly bad movie,

Incoming (2018)

Strange and bad

[2/10 · 24 July 2021]

This movies is bad. But its not awfully bad as the worst ou there. Infact, it they skip the super stupid idea in having a space prison its could have been decedent

The actor are really not that bad and the photo and plot is okay. What really drags this down are two things: the moronic idea of a space prison and the super bad specail effects

If they skipped these two things this one could have been a decent lowbudget action movie.

But they didnt and the movie is just bad.

Interstellar Wars (2016)

Very bad

[1/10 · 23 July 2021]

Now this is a bad movie!

This is as cheesy is it gets. The actors are bad even by porn standards, the special "effects" are something a child could have done, the scripts non existent, the actors do super stupid things all the time.

Of course the photo is awful. I can shoot better with my mobile camera. What kind of equipment did they use? The sounds comes and goes. Some actors whisper, some are screaming.

An in all, this movies is totaly worthless. Unfortunatly it was not so fun that i thought it would be after reading the comments here in imdb. You get a bit mentally exhausted of all the stupidity.

Still it can be worth a watch if you are into serioulsy bad movies.

Surf Nazis Must Die (1987)

Weird

[2/10 · 23 July 2021]

This is a strange movie. I can't get my head around if they really thought this was a good idea or if it was deliberately bad.

The actors are playing with extremly dead pane faces. The idea of surfer nazis is so silly that I doubt that anyone can have done this on purpose though.

The movie itself is quite boring. Around half of the movie are people surfing. Long and boring shoots of people surfing. Its not that intressting, maybe it was back in 1987

As for the rest of the movie, it's boring and confusing. The script is so unfocused that it's hard to follow what's going on. Sometimes you laugh at something utterly stupid but most of the time it's just - boring.

Alla in all, this movie is absurd but not as funny as some other classic c-movies like Troll 2 or Birdemic.

Kampout (2017)

So bad its good !

[1/10 · 5 July 2021]

This movie has it all!!

This is the perfect bad movie thats will make you laugh all the time

Everything about this movie is bad: the acting is awful, the script does not exist, the photo is dull and the music is misplaced

The movies also doesnt make sense: the plot isn´t coherrent. It seems that some scenes are coming in the wrong order, and some scenes that would explain things are missing.

The monster is supersilly. It's extremly obvious a man in a mask. The budget must have been superlow when thats the best they could come up with

Overall this movie is awful, but its so bad its good.

In fact, its the perfect "so bad its good movie"

So grab your friends and a bunch of popcorn and bear and have fun.

Pontypool (2008)

ROFL

[2/10 · 2 June 2021]

For all you C-films lovers out there this film is for you. Me and my son laughed so hard from first scen to the last. This film is rediciolus in all sense of the way. The actors are crap, the script is insane, everything about this bad excuse for a film is totally crap

But its fun. You will laugh at all the stupidity and bad acting (the doctor is hilarious). The whole ide that words can carry virus is so stupid that there is no word in the english language that can explain it. The ending of the film makes no sense at all. Its just like: WHAT ??

So if you are into really bad films, this is for you !!

Cats (2019)

Mental meltdown

[1/10 · 15 January 2021]

Many people here have already pointed out that this movie is extremely bad. And it is. Very very bad. I don't have to do that again but instead I want to point out that this movie makes me think of what the word bad really means. Sure this is bad, but it's also something else. I get the same feeling from watching this as I get from watching Troll 2 and Birdemic: this has been created by a twisted mind. It's not bad in the traditional way but bad in the sense of a piece of filth created by someone not mentally well.

Another thing that strike me is that the awful cats look like demons out of a crappy c-movie. They just look and move like shadows in the background of horror movies. Once you see that you can't stop thinking about it. Its very disturbing.

From time to time the stupidity and awfulness in this movies makes you almost hypnotized. In some bizarre way it makes you feel numb and in chock, unable to move out of your chair to switch it off.

This is not something to watch for people who are not used to very, very, very bad movies. It's a film that could make you permantly damaged if you are a person that use to see normal and decent movies. If you are not accustomed to watching hardcore crap fests like The Room and Troll 2, I suggest you split the viewing into pieces (like 4 or 5 maybe) to reduce the mental pain you are due to experience.

The Devil's Restaurant (2017)

Underrated "so bad its good" movie

[1/10 · 4 December 2020]

Now ladies and gentleman, this is a really bad movie. It competes with Troll 2, Birdemic and The Room of the worst movie ever made. It's extremely bad and it really deserves some better attention from all the "so bad its good" film lovers out there.

The movie itself is a total train wreck of extremely bad acting, lousy script, bad sound and photo. Some scenes doesn't make sense at all. Other scenes seems like they are happening in the wrong order. Confusing and very very very bad.

The silly story about a restaurant owner that has a monster in the basement is ridiculous in itself and it doesn't make more sense when the "monster" shows up and is a man in a ugly mask!

Do NOT watch this movie if you are not into "so bad its good" movies.

Dragon Soldiers (2020)

WOW! So bad !!!

[1/10 · 22 August 2020]

This one is amazing in sheer badness ! If you wanna laugh at a really bad movies this is it !

The plot is non excistent, the camera work sucks big time, the actors are useless and when the "dragon" shows up you just scream out loud in laughter to the bad CGI

So grab a few bears, get your friends togheter and have a good time

It doesnt get any better / lower than this one

Manhunt (2008)

Nothing specal

[4/10 · 22 August 2020]

This movies isnt really bad but its nothing special either, The actors are ok, the plots is working but it becames a bit boting after a while. You have seen all this before in better movies

This is nothing special really

See a better movie

The Gravedancers (2006)

Now this is a bad film !!!

[2/10 · 22 August 2020]

I was curious to watch this one because of all the good reviews here. But man was I dissapointed!!

The actors are wodden, the photo is awful, the so called special effects are laughable.

If this was a comedy i would gives it 6 stars. Its extremly unintionally funny, especially in the end.

Apart from being very funny at times this trash of amovies does the carnal sin of horror movies: its boring

Stay away from this dog. You have seen it all and better in other and better movies

Avoid !!

The Rental (2020)

This is a BIG warning

[22 August 2020]

Don NOT watch this movie !! This is an awful one !!!

Its really frustrating and emberassing that this kind of crap enter the big screen in Stockholm city. This dirt shuld have been direct to the dvd or streaming. It is very uncommon that i want to walk out of a cinema but it was close this time

Its a bit sad to see the decline of horror movies. This movie had all the cliches you have seen hundred times before. Four non-likeable characters go on a weekend to a big house in the countryside. Of course there is a mad killer killing them one by one. Heard that one before?

Its not funny, smart, exciting, or anytihing else you would want from a horror movie. In fact this piece of crap is just bad, bad, bad . In a good movie you relate to the characters and identify with them. The idiots in this movies you just want them to die as fast as possible.

The ending is useless and pointless. It just ends, without any explanations.

Did i mentions there are a lot of plot holes too?

The only, and only, reason this dog don´t get a 1 star is becasue the camera work is pretty decent.

AVOID !!!

Naken (2000)

Bad bad bad bad

[1/10 · 10 February 2020]

Its not fun too see a naked guy running around naked in downtown Stockholm in a stupid and worthless movie. Its also not fun to see this utterly stupid actor not acting. This movie fails in all levels. Its sexistic. Its stupid. The actors are emberrasing. The plot is non existing or very very confusing. The filming is bad. The sound is bad. I get an headache from the stupidity overlord. Everyone involved in this movie should be ashamed of themselves.

Its not even so bad its funny, its just bad bad bad

This could be the worst swedish movie ever. Stay away att all cost. This film make people sick

It should be expelled from planet earth

House on Haunted Hill (1999)

Now this is a BAD movie

[2/10 · 15 October 2019]

I havent seen the original movie with Vincent Price but i guess its far more better than this junk, Geoffrey Rush try to act like Vincet Price but fails miserably. Hes is simply a very bad actor. The others actors are boring and uninteresting.

The plot doesnt exist and the scary jumps are so predictable that we sat and said: now will a scary jump and, yes, there it was.

All in all a very, very bad movie which is boring and predictable and the stuff going on here have you seen being made far better in other movies.

I dont recommend this boring and stupid movie to anyone.

Rottweiler (2004)

Now this is a bad movie!

[2/10 · 25 June 2019]

I love this movie. It's a great "so bad its good movie". In fact this is one of the most hilarious movies I've seen in quite some time. Me and my son laughed right out at scenes that were supposed to be scary. It's an unknown gem in the bad movie genre.

Exactly how bad is this movie? Well. It's not Troll 2 bad of course buts is somewhere in the line of Birdemic, minus the godawful birds. The actors here are awful, the plot is confusing, the monster dog looks ridiculous, and you laugh all the time at the incompetents in the filmmaking.

All in all this is very entertaining for us who likes really, really bad movies

The idea of a monster dog that attacks people is really not that bad but the execution is beyond bad. The camera work sucks, the sounds goes up and down, the music is not fitting the scenes

The guys involved in this insult should never be given the chance to do another movie

Or maybe they should so we lovers of awful movies could laugh again!

Daughter of Darkness (1990 TV Movie)

Awful or really good

[1/10 · 25 June 2019]

This is extremely bad or extremely good depending in which perspective you have. If you have the perspective of a horror movie it's awful, but if you see it as a comedy, it's brilliant.

This "film" has all you can expect from a really bad movie: Stupid plot, ridiculous acting, bad music and bad photo. Many scenes are so bad that I keep thinking if they were meant to be bad. Were they?

The plot makes no sense: the girl's father is dead. She has not care for him at all when he was living why should she care when he's dead? And it gets really stupid when they go to Romania and of course her father is an undead. Can it be sillier?

Antony Perkins use to be cool but I guess not even him can keep up in this mess. Mia Sara looks good but is totally hopeless. The scenes from Romania (shot in Bulgaria) are descent though but the rest of the movie is plain stupid.

Only for die-hard fans of really bad movies. For the rest of you: watch another movie!

Frankenstein vs. the Mummy (2015)

Very very bad

[2/10 · 25 June 2019]

Very, very bad

I bought this movie in Stockholm for 10 Swedish krowns (1 USD). I don't know if it was worth it.

I expect to see a bad movie and yeah I got it. This movie is bad in several ways: First of all it's way too long. Its 1,46 and could easily have been cut down to 1,25 which would have been much better.

The beginning of the movie is too slow. We see a lot of non-interesting conversations which the main characters are too bad to deliver. Some of the scenes are "so bad it's funny" but not enough to make this movie that kind of movie.

After a long boring time the monsters show up and they look silly. Especially "Frankenstein" looks really silly. I mean; Is that the best you can come up with?

The dialogue are worthless, the actors are poor. Sure, the girl is pretty but that doesn't help this movie out. The only thing that makes this movie avoid a number 1 in rating is that this movie has a decent photo, sound and music.

Another annoying thing is that it says stuff on the back of the DVD box that isn't in the movie.

All in all this movies sucks hard time. The only person who should watch this are guys like me who like "so bad it's fun" movies. For the rest of you guys out there: stay away !!

Left Behind (I) (2014)

Brain meltingly bad

[1/10 · 3 March 2019]

I had very low expectations on this movie since i heard its was awful and since Nicholas Cage are a lousy actor. I thought, in my stupidity, that it would one these "so-bad-its-good-movies"

But no it wasn't. It was just brain meltingly bad.

In fact it was so bad that I start to fell physically sick and had a severe headache. I thought for real that I was getting sick and I had to lay down to get some rest before writing this review.

Where do one start? I use to avoid the grade 1 on imdb because very few movies are so bad that they deserve a number 1. I was thinking of getting this a 2 because a number 1 would be reserved for really, really bad movies. But then I thought: why should I not give this awful piece of trash a 1?

It is really that bad. It's in the company of The room, Troll 2 and other "masterpieces" but different from these movies this one is mostly boring.

Nothing works in this movie. The actors are 100% bad and non believable, the script is horrible, the plot is extremely boring, the Christian "message" (if there is any)? Are insanely stupid

All in all this a movie that no one shall see. If there ever is a rapture please take this move but not to film heaven but to the opposite place and let it stay there.

Feed the Devil (2015)

Now this is a bad movie

[2/10 · 8 January 2019]

I love this movie. Its preposterously bad. The actors are awful, the script is nonexistent, the camerawork and music are bad and I have not for a long time seen so many plot holes in a movie

In the movie almost nothing happens. The actors are taking the wrong decision all the time. Sometimes i start imagine that maybe the scenes where put together in the wrong order. Many times things just happen without purpose or without leading anywhere.

For example:

What was the purpose with that mute girl? Why did she lead martin to her house? Why did she laugh? For what reason? It doesn't make sense at all.

In the beginning of the movie why did the girls get it of the car after being attacked by wolfs? Wouldn't it be much more reasonable to get in the car and out of here?

At many times the actors are so bad (especially Martin) that its lol-funny. From time to time the movies are so confusing that it's difficult to understand what's going on.

The beautiful Canadian wilderness is not being used the way it could and should. The morons that made this movie fail to even get a decent shot of the beauty of nature.

Sadly the movie ends with gore and Martin looking more stupid than ever.

This "movie" fills med with a lot of question. Why was it done? What was it intend to be in the first place? Maybe the guys behind this trash had something completely different in mind (I hope so)

All in all its really, really bad. The only reason I don't give it a 1 was that it's so bad it's funny