deny-966-237037 Reviews

Silent Night (2023)

Cringefest

[2/10 · 21 December 2023]

John Woo may have done one or good movies, but this is just horrible. Never have I ever watched a movie trailer and get so pumped to watch a movie that turned out to be this level of garbage.

Plot convenience has been elevated to a whole new level, to the point of being absurd and ridiculous. Acting is very, VERY bad, and here's the kicker, it's NOT because of the actors, it becomes very obvious that the actors - who by the way have almost ZERO lines of dialog for some reason - are INSTRUCTED by the director to express themselves by facial expression and body language, in the most idiotic possible manner.

The action scenes are going to look stupid to anyone who knows anything about guns, cars, or fighting. Cars are bullet proof, automatic weapons fire 300 rounds without changing a magazine, but for some reason the producers decided to make some of the bad guys basically bullet proof.

This kind of movie practically REQUIRES a stoic hero, but the director probably wanted to make him more "human" and instead turned him into an idiot.

If like me you've watched the trailer and thought this was going to be a good movie, you can still avoid wasting 1h45m of your precious time and spare yourself from the cringe and annoyance, fair warning.

Hellraiser (2022)

Why?

[2/10 · 4 December 2022]

Why reboot an IP to make it much worse than the original only for the sake of gender swapping and pushing the usual political agenda? There's some good dialog in the script, but the characters are very unlikeable so I didn't care about them at all. I know horror movie characters are supposed to be stupid but we need to be able to understand and make some sense of their decisions at some level, which isn't the case here. There's more family drama than I'd like to endure in a horror movie, the editing is poor and the pacing is painfully slow. Hellraiser movies are supposed to be violent and gory, and this one is neither, looks like a softened version for sensitive audiences, who shouldn't really be watching horror movies to begin with, maybe Scary Movie is a better fit for them.

Black Adam (2022)

Excelent as a role model

[9/10 · 22 October 2022]

If you're a dad and worried about your son becoming a worthless insect like most genZ and Millennial BETAs, I'd suggest you take him to watch Black Adam so he learns what a real man looks, sounds and acts like.

It's far from perfect and could be a little more violent, some casting decisions are far from ideal and the plot is kinda predictable, but compared with previous DCEU movies (except WWI) and the current Marvel crop, it's a masterpiece. I'd say go watch it, fun is guaranteed unless you're one of those blue haired people.

Visuals and special effects in general are what you'd expect from a movie at this budget class, but the action scenes are something special and probably worth the price of admission alone.

Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

Beyond crap

[1/10 · 13 August 2022]

Hollywood's habit of creating movies by formula has reached a new low, this thing is just horrible, and I was expecting it to be bad. The plot is so awful and the directing is so boring I started drifting away after a few minutes and couldn't care less about it. There's no doubt in my mind that this movie was written, produced and directed by idiots, which tells me there are way too many of them in position to burn millions of dollars in atrocities like this. I'm not going to go into the woke identity politics garbage in the movie as it's quite irrelevant given how terrible everything else is, even though I do believe it might be the main cause for the disastrous failure of JWD. As many others have mentioned, that's the end of the Jurassic franchise, may it rest in peace.

Manifest (2018–2023)

Started out great, then meh, but 3rd season is horribly annoying

[6/10 · 25 July 2022]

1st season was excellent, 2nd season was bearable, but 3rd season doubled down on every single character behaving like an entitled idiot, which probably reflects the personality and intellect of the writers. It's kinda sad that even someone as brilliant as Robert Zemeckis (executive producer) couldn't save Manifest. Whenever there's drama and arguing I just wish everyone's heads would explode and be done with it, I'm on S03E08 and starting to doubt I'll have the stomach to endure through.

The Lost City (2022)

Such a cool and fun movie

[10/10 · 10 May 2022]

Unpretentious, light hearted and actually funny - which is something I can say about 1 in every 100 comedies, at most. I won't try to rationalize why and how the director makes you care about the characters, but if you have a heart (like this movie), you will. The script is well written, another rarity these days, and the acting is excellent, even when the scripts calls for larger-than-life and exaggerated performances. It just works, pacing is great, soundtrack is spot on, what more could a viewer possibly wish for? This isn't my favorite genre but I'm giving it 10/10 because I think it deserves better than its current rating.

Uncharted (2022)

Not good

[3/10 · 26 April 2022]

Starts boring, gets annoying and predictable, and ends completely nonsensical. It's the "connect the dots and then paint by numbers" of Indiana Jones wannabes. Oh and the soundtrack is awful too.

Death on the Nile (2022)

Just horrible

[1/10 · 14 April 2022]

I don't think someone could put this many bad things together in a movie on purpose: bad acting, bad directing, horrible soundtrack, bad screenplay... The opening scene was nothing special but at least it wasn't boring and annoying like the rest of the movie. The directing is noticeably pretentious and the restaurant scene at the beginning with the couple nearly doing it while dancing was insufferably cringe. The woke overtones here and there were like maggots sprinkled over a generous pile of feces, a perfect match for an already all around talentless piece of work. I'm glad Agatha Christie isn't alive to witness this dumpster fire of a movie.

The Outfit (2022)

Good cinema is still alive

[8/10 · 12 April 2022]

The only way to make a single location movie work is with a great (just "good" won't cut it) combination of story, direction, acting, cinematography and soundtrack. The Outfit delivers all of that with a touch of class and keeping the audience on its toes until the very end, in what's in my opinion one of the best movies of the year.

Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (2021)

Wait, is this a joke?

[1/10 · 28 December 2021]

Feels like this movie was written, shot, produced and directed by 12 year-olds. I'm not even kidding, who the hell green lighted something this stupid? I feel sorry for any actors and employees unwillingly caught up in this dumpster fire, I thought this franchise couldn't possibly get any worse but alas, somehow they've done it, congrats.

Dune (2021)

Pretentious, slow and convoluted, with unlikable characters

[2/10 · 18 October 2021]

"Unlikable" might be an understatement, the actor who plays Paul (don't care enough to look up his name) is so annoying I want to punch him in the face, not sure if that's from the script or his actual personality, but pretty sure that's not how we're supposed to feel about the character.

The pacing is painfully slow a lot of the time, to the point I've caught myself thinking about how weird it is that a 20 year old movie feels like it has better action than a new one. Lots of pretentious "deep" dialogue dragging themselves for minutes that should have been seconds. The plot gets extremely confusing a lot of the time, leaving the spectator clueless as for what the hell is going on, and that's coming from someone who watched the first movie multiple times. In fact I will watch it again just to get the bad aftertaste from this one.

Killing Eve (2018–2022)

Spy movie if spies were mentally challenged

[1/10 · 12 October 2021]

I went into this one just to get me some more Jodie Comer and she sure doesn't disappoint, she's as amazing as ever in "Killing Eve".

Problem is, she's the ONLY thing this show has going on for it. Seriously.

Unless all agents in MI6 have the mental capacity of a 6 year old. The main character's decisions are beyond idiotic, and to make things worse there are hints of a woke agenda (granted it was 2018 so not as aggressive as these days), which partially explain the talentless writing. Still, Jodie Comer makes it watchable so far, let's see how much of the rest of it, which is frankly just a steaming pile of crap, I can take and for how long.

Fun fact, I never root for the bad guy but am very happy to make an exception for Jodie.

Escape Room: Tournament of Champions (2021)

Horrible cringefest

[2/10 · 13 September 2021]

Soooo boring and really, really badly written. Movie producers seem to think anyone can write a screenplay these days judging by this disastrous piece of crap. Casting isn't much better either, actors are not likable or relatable, so I wasn't able to get invested in any of them and didn't really care if they all died - in fact, at a point I was really hoping they would. Avoid like the plague.

The Suicide Squad (2021)

Awesome movie

[10/10 · 8 August 2021]

I thought the first Suicide Squad was horrible, pretentious and badly written, and acting wasn't very good either.

When someone told me this one was better I wasn't expecting it to be *this good*, so I felt I had to write a review.

The Suicide Squad is incredibly entertaining and the jokes are actually funny, heck I laughed more than in some actual comedies. It's well written and directed with a lot of heart so you do get invested in the characters and cheer when they succeed at something, which is what superhero movies are all about. I don't really think it deserves a 10, but because I see a lot of idiots giving it 1/2 stars (why do you even watch superhero movies to begin with?), I felt compensation was in order.

Worth a watch without a doubt, go see it!

The New Mutants (2020)

I didn't know teens were directing movies now

[1/10 · 15 November 2020]

This movie is incredibly bad. Feels like it makes a huge effort to be horrible, on purpose. It's like a bunch of kids were given the budget and told "we want a mutant movie, do whatever you want". The acting is horrendous, and seems like it's not the actors but what the producer/director was looking for. I could try, but there are not enough bad things I can say about this abomination. Best advice I can give is: don't waste your time with this piece of crap, it's not a superhero movie, it's a teen drama movie and a really bad one at that.

The Boys (2019– )

Doesn't get any better than this

[10/10 · 14 September 2020]

A super hero series that feels so real it's easy to actually believe it could happen and relate to the characters, like someone went to the trouble of spending a few minutes developing the characters personalities and thinking how they'd react in any given situation. Also this is a series that hasn't been infected by the "let's give this to our A TEAM now" like Netflix does whenever something becomes a hit, and turns good series into woke pieces of crap filled with identity politics and political messages. Second season is on and it's just as good as the first one, if not better! Just watched episode 4 and can't wait for the next one.

Disaster Movie (2008)

Horrible

[1/10 · 26 July 2020]

It's like someone trying to tickle you right after your parents died in a horrible accident. This movie is a DISASTER, oh wait, now I get it.

Star Trek: Picard (2020–2023)

Trash

[2/10 · 5 February 2020]

My issue with this one is how absurd the "science" part of the fiction is in this thing. I really stopped watching when scientist woman mentioned something about reconstructing a synthetic brain from a single positron. A positron is the anti-matter equivalent of an electron. It's a subatomic particle, nothing more. It's probably the stupidest attempt at pseudo-science I have ever heard. Is it possible that something similar becomes possible in a million years? Maybe. But for a story to be engaging it needs to be believable, and this one isn't. I might be wrong but I have a feeling this will not be the only such bad attempt at throwing buzzwords that sound "sciency" around and hoping they stick. I feel sorry for the producers and for the cast but the story is just terrible, next time hire a physicist as a consultant so it's a bit less embarrassing.

6 Underground (2019)

Don't waste your time

[2/10 · 15 December 2019]

I kept waiting for the music clip to end and for the actual movie to begin until I realized this isn't really a movie, there's no story, just a bunch of scenery and action clips stitched together and punctuated with laconic pretentious punchlines. It's really admirable how much money can be spent to produce something visually stunning but with no actual content. Here's a crazy idea, next time spend more money hiring a decent writer and director and save some on VFX, stunts and cars.

Alita: Battle Angel (2019)

Better than I expected, and I was expecting A LOT!

[10/10 · 15 February 2019]

I don't write reviews very often but I was so awestruck after watching Alita I've been watching the trailers again non-stop since I got home and am seriously considering watching the movie again maybe on iMax, so why not write a review. I've been waiting for Alita to hit theaters since the first trailer came out last year, and it didn't disappoint: she is simply adorable, and to accomplish something like this with a CGI character is an incredible feat on its own. But on top of that there's a good story, some of the best action scenes I've ever seen, and what's also great is that it feels like an actual movie, as opposed to a bunch of action scenes stitched together. I'm not giving out any spoilers but I'll say this, Alita is now one of my favorite heroes of all time, it got me excited and with misty eyes throughout the entire flick and I left the theater with a smile on my face, can't wait for part 2! So, I'd have to say that it's as good as it gets.

The Predator (2018)

That's right, I gave it a ten

[10/10 · 1 December 2018]

Best action movie I've seen in a long time, good acting, good character development, good plot, great pace and action, what's not to like? And having a mild degree of asperger syndrome myself, I especially liked how the kid was portrayed. A few plotholes, yes, but who cares? I even laughed at the jokes, can't say the same thing about most of the comedies I've watched. If you like sci-fi action and are not a die hard Predator fan who thinks every movie in the franchise should stick to a fixed formula, I guarantee you'll like it.

The Titan (2018)

I feel violated by this abomination of a movie

[1/10 · 8 April 2018]

"The Titan" feels like something that would come out of a teenager who's not particularly smart, but has a lot of money to burn. Forget about being predictable, the screenplay is just stupid and nonsensical, to the point I felt awkwardly sorry for the resposibles for bringing such a horrible film to audiences. It feels like a B-Movie from the eighties, full of plot holes and bad writing, no wonder Netflix removed it from its highlights row. The sad part is I still feel like I'm offending teenagers with a camera (or even a cellphone) with my first statement, because I'm pretty sure a lot of them can come up with something much better than this piece of crap.

American Assassin (2017)

Review of the first 3 minutes

[1/10 · 9 December 2017]

I'm sorry I didn't have the stomach to watch the whole thing, but my time is precious and I'm not about to waste over 1h of it on this piece of garbage. I could hold the puke in during the unbearably cheesy engagement scene on the beach in the opening scene, which combined with the title of the movie gives it away (unless you're 3 years old) that the fiancé is going to die so the main character has an excuse to become, well, an American assassin. What I am not willing to take anymore is that after a group of men armed with automatic weapons start shooting people dead on the beach, the recently engaged girl wanders oblivious to the shooting taking place around her calling for her fiancé - yes, as predicted she gets shot and probably dies, not sure because I sopped caring and watching at this point. In my book, anyone that stupid deserves to die (Darwin awards anyone?) so in my opinion the guy's following hunt for the guys who killed his girl is unjustified because the way I see it they did him a favor. How someone who has the nerve to film something this stupid is able to get funding for such a horrible movie is beyond me, if I could give it a -10 I would, because the current rating - probably artificially raised by bots and fake profiles - is totally undeserved, this flick should be getting a 2, TOPS.

Wonder Woman (2017)

Excellent movie, and comments on all the bad reviews

[10/10 · 27 August 2017]

I was really surprised at all the bad reviews on a movie that has all the right elements for a good action movie: good actors, good direction, a reasonably good script, and that pinch of magic that turns all of these into an actual entertaining movie. And entertaining it is, as show its box office figures - unless you are one of the following types of reviewer:

1. "Boring" in the title: we get it, you are a rock star who is secretly a CIA operative, fighting crime, doing high speed pursuits, exploding stuff and killing bad guys with assault rifles. But keep in mind most of us live more mundane lives and thus your incredibly exciting lifestyle can't be used as a reference that's useful to the rest of us.

2. "Insult to your intelligence" in the title: okay, so you're both a Nobel prize and Oscar winner, we get it. You're so intelligent that to you the rest of us are like a bunch of apes. WE GET IT. Now if you would please let us apes enjoy our monkey movies that we find entertaining, that would be swell, thank you very much. Next time you write a review though, it would be best if you put a disclosure somewhere saying it's only for people with an IQ above 200 or something.

3. "Your hate cliché here" in title: lots of reviews giving bad ratings for various different reasons, but interestingly all of them in sequence, effectively burying the good reviews under a number of pages of bad ones. What could this be? An organized bunch of people upset with the success of a movie whose hero is a tall, lean, beautiful Jewish woman who does not hate all males, perhaps? I wonder who these people might be.

So to sum things up, if you have an agenda or an ego the size of Connecticut, you're probably not going to like this movie, well, at least not admit to it. But if all you're looking for is an entertaining, heart warming and even uplifting movie, definitely go watch it. On a side note, I have always liked superhero movies because they portrait the decision of an individual who, despite having super powers and being able to use them to do pretty much anything he/she wants, still chooses to use them nobly and for the good of others. Personally I would not trust a person who fails to perceive and appreciate the beauty of that kind of attitude.

Iron Fist (2017–2018)

Horrible

[1/10 · 18 March 2017]

Plot holes, annoying characters, crappy fight scenes - this one's got it all. But what really sets it apart from other shitty shows is that it's full of characters who are supposedly following this or that oriental philosophy and training martial arts, but still behave like idiotic spoiled rich kids who throw a tantrum whenever things don't go as expected. Ask any martial artist with years of training if they'd behave like that and out of 100 of them you'll hear 100 "no"s. And did I mention how *bad* the fight scenes are? They did use the harnesses that allow them to do those crazy flying-like stunts, but without proper combat training and more importantly, good editing, it looks even more ridiculous. On the bright side, Jessica Henwick is very cute and Tom Pelphrey is one of the best actors I've ever seen, he literally steals the show, honestly and makes it worth it if just for the acting lessons.