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ukheather
I watch 3 movies every weekday and 5-6 every weekend/public holiday and have for decades.
I am chronically ill and disabled so I have a lot of time to watch things and I have seen tens of thousands of movies.
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
Christmas Magic (2011)
Bad lead and story
I love Hallmark movies and watch tons of them
The male lead is terrible. Really bad. The female isn't great, but nothing like the male. He really lets it down
The story is very silly but I won't spoil it, but it is ridiculous.
She should be concerned with other things!
Something major happens and she is smiles with no concern for the future... it's just so silly.
Plus there is a twist that makes no sense as the fate was stated earlier in the film, but changes later for this twist that makes zero sense!
The 10/10 ratings are definitely not real! Must be fake.
It's not a 1 but it's nowhere near a 10!
Robots (2023)
Avoid if you can't stand Jack Whitehall
I personally cannot stand jack nor his humour (I'm British too) and this is the most painful movie. Not just because he is in it, but because it's not funny and boring as hell.
It's not only very UNfunny, but it's painful with not 1 but 2 Jacks in this! Won't say more as not going to spoil it if you do watch it.
If you like comedy movies with out any humour that are more boring than anything, then this is the movie for you.
If you like comedy movies to be funny and don't want to be bored senseless, this isn't for you. More so if you don't like jack whitehall!
The writing is poor and the comedy is even worse.
I only leave reviews if I feel it's needed.
The Triangle (2016)
Made me sick with a migraine from the sound!
The story was pretty meh, expected more with found footage style films, the ending was too abrupt too
The main issue I had was that as the story has high pitched sounds on it later in the film, they actually made me really sick with a migraine from the sound! Physically sick.
A high pitched sound comes in the film and there is a really high one they complain about, and a lower level one that lasts for a long time, that not everyone can hear.
It made me physically sick with a migraine due to the sound lasting for 20-30 mins.
Avoid if you can hear high pitched sounds, especially if they ever make you unwell.
Tracks (2018)
Dreadful with dreadful humour
This is such a bad film. 15 mins in and I'm ready for the end. I stick with it to the end to see if it picked up. It didn't.
Trust the other low scores and ignore the fake 10. This is bad.
Soon as it started I said "I bet this guy produced or directed this" and yup he did.
The humour is none existent. It's like childish humour that doesn't even bring a smirk. It's not even slightly funny. We looked at each other every time there was a "joke" and both rolled our eyes every time.
The conversations were painful, childish, pointless conversations. Barely any discussion of the trip, just moaning, arguing and childish conversations.
It's like 2 young kids in a playground. No joke!
It's not I don't get the humour, I'm British too, it's just the worst I've ever seen. Honestly, and I watch 2 movies every single day so seen a lot of films!
Humour is the worst I've seen in a while. It's like two 10-13 year old kids making "jokes" with barely any storyline. It's like they were just trying to get in "jokes" rather than a good story.
No story, constant music and skipping through their trip super fast, only stopping the music and sped up scenes for the "jokes". And the jokes aren't even jokes.
Be prepared to not laugh. At all. And be prepared for the dumbest, most pointless, unfunny, childish conversations ever.
-10 but can't rate negative, so 1 star.
Second Chance Christmas (2017)
Filled with lying! Absolutely infuriating
This is the most infuriating film I've ever seen!
The film is just the entire cast lying to the lead character for the entire film, which included her parents, family, husband, best friend, husband, and even the lead character herself!
They all lie to the lead character and everyone thinks this is totally fine! All because she was busy with work so didn't get time for people, so that means it's fine to lie to her, gaslight her, make her forget she was getting divorced, and make her think she's unemployed rather than the truth that she owns her own company!
And then after it all comes out, he lies yet again!
Infuriating!
Normal people would tell her, but these people think that's fine.
She even forgives him for the constant lies and stays with him!
It's baffling!
Killer Weekend (2020)
Shocking acting especially from lead
The acting is terrible. The lead actress is so bad I would t be surprised if she paid for the part! It's the worst I've seen in a long time as she's the lead!
The review score is justified.
Happy 40th (2015)
Pretty good!
I was a little wary with the lack of reviews but it's a really good film!
Highly recommend it. Don't let the lack of reviews put you off.
Also as someone disabled, I liked it addressed disabled people as well which many films don't include.
Senior Year (2022)
Not remotely funny
This is incredibly unfunny. Nothing was funny.
Rebel seems to always so the same humour and it's not funny.
Watch this only if you're a fan as it's a trash for the rest of us.
The Shipment (2021)
Laughable in a bad way
I really had a good laugh at this, but it isn't a comedy. It is just hilarious in parts at the script or other things.
The acting isn't the worst I've seen although not great, but the script and bad camera shots that make it worse.
I laughed out loud in parts and I wasn't alone.
Fortress (2021)
Not great and funny in a bad way
The acting is not great with a few really bad actors in it, the story is silly and had some really silly plot holes. It's not the worst film I've seen but it's not good at all.
I am a fan of Bruce and surprised he keeps doing movies like this. I guess it's still money.
Shannon Doherty turned up which I had to check it was her on here as I wasn't sure at first.
Ive seen much worse, but it's watchable if you want to kill some time, but don't expect a good film.
3/4 through the film the story gets a bit silly and there is a lot of made up stuff in "the fortress" that made no sense but it's fine as a meh film.
The Electrical Life of Louis Wain (2021)
Lovely film
I hadn't heard of Louis although I had seen a few of his paintings without realising it was him.
A really nice guy who loved cats and wanted to share them with everyone.
What a shame about the copyright issue!
Well worth a watch.
Christmas Coach (2019)
What the heck Hallmark?
As a fan of Hallmark films, i am used to the usual standard of acting. This is like a film pretending to be a Hallmark movie.
The lead female is so annoying you just want her to never speak again but she never shuts up and the acting is poor. The male has a terrible fake accent and can't act very well either. Not sure if he just tried too hard to be a posh English guy rather than concentrating on acting.
The acting is just too bad. It's really horrible!
I don't know why they cast these actors at all. After all normally they are all fine.
Worst one to date.
Christmas at Graceland (2018)
My least favourite Hallmark
Kellie Pickler isn't a very good actress and her endless bad miming to clearly pre-recorded in a studio with added auto tune makes it quite painful.
I usually really enjoy Hallmark movies. This character and singing isn't needed and shouldn't have been so clearly badly mimed to auto tune rich pre-recorded songs for what were all supposed to be random impromptu singing opportunities.
But the actress let the film down for me mostly. Shame as the other actors as fine as you usually get.
Goodbye Honey (2020)
Not bad
It's actually not too bad a film. Obviously on a budget but the acting was fine and least the storyline was a bit different.
Stick with it if you aren't sure to start with. It's not bad.
Ignore the 1's. It's not a 1.
This Is the Night (2021)
Absolute joke
This was so bad. It's just lots of people obsessed with Rocky and being angry at people for talking badly about a fictional character in a movie....
It's just so hilariously BAD!
Unless a Rocky fan, avoid! Seriously!
Bergman Island (2021)
Snoozefest and feels like a Bergman promotion video
This really is a snoozefest and feels like it's a promotion video for this place in Sweden.
Also animal cruelty involved. Two of them pick small jellyfish up and thrown them at each other in a jellyfish throwing battle. No need for this! This IS animal cruelty!
Rise and Shine, Benedict Stone (2021)
Ok besides the lead "child"
The film is fine, but the lead apparent 16 year old is not only incredibly annoying but she is clearly 21 and literally is plus the overacting of her pretending to be is dreadful.
It's hard it ignore when she is in most scenes.
Otherwise it's a typical TV movie.
The Final Wish (2018)
Boring
This is really boring and confusing. I didn't expect much but this was really bad. Was excited for it ending.
Lynn Shane is the usually crazy lady character she usually plays in every film.
Avoid!
The Killing of Kenneth Chamberlain (2019)
Very sad and truthful movie
Sad story but it's needed for people to see what happened. Still no justice. That is just crazy! There should be justice for him. How awful.
Twice the Dream (2019)
Hilariously bad. Check the fake 10 star reviews!
The main character is a not a good actress and even worse "singer'.
I laughed and said "I bet she wrote this and cast herself as a singer". I looked as she actually did write and direct it.
Really bad.
Fake reviews giving this 10 stars when it's dreadful.
The film is like a cheap TV movie, which is fine as nothing wrong with a TV movie, but the main actress is really bad and ruins the film. Her bad acting and singing are cringe worthy.
Clearly wanting to live a fantasy in a film whilst writing and directing it.
Vintage Hearts (2020)
Not the usual Hallmark standards
I have seen a lot of Hallmark films and know the usual standard is about the same.
This was the worst hallmark I have ever seen. The acting was very poor! Never seen acting this bad in a hallmark film.
Fireflies in the Garden (2008)
Cruelty killing insects
It's not ok to just kill fireflies with rackets as do like they do in the film. I was mortified watching them just kill them while cheering and laughing!
Trainwreck: My Life as an Idiot (2007)
Not funny
This is not at all funny. Expected it to be ok from seeing some of his other films.
Also don't really appreciate seeing dying fish in a movie.....
Zebra Girl (2021)
Dreadful
Not sure what film the high reviews were watching as it's rubbish. Bad acting and story.
Also a lot of spiders. Big ones. If you're scared of them like me they appear quite a bit!
Say It Isn't So (2001)
Not remotely funny
I don't know how any actors agreed to do this. It's awful and not remotely funny!